Confessions of a Black
by MelissaLianne
Summary: Narcissa Black is in her final year at Hogwarts, when things begin to go dangerously wrong. Murder and betraylment being just two examples. Will her sister and friends swear alliegance to the dark lord? Read on...
1. Chapter 1

Narcissa tightened her cloak around her as she waited for her sister, Bellatrix, to stop groping Rodolphus Lestrange (or was it the other way around?) and to board the train with her. She sighed inwardly and glanced at the huge clock towering above her. The hands were reaching eleven quicker and quicker. "Where are they?" She mumbled, scuffing her black shoes on the platform in temper. "Cissy, why are you waiting here?" Bellatrix appeared, her hair out of place and her make-up slightly smudged. Narcissa rolled her eyes and grabbed her sister by her arm and dragged her onto the train. "Waiting for you." She replied curtly. The whistle blew, and the doors went to shut themselves, when Lucius Malfoy and Rodolophus came running to the train. "Wait!"  
"It's not going to open, Rod."  
"Sod off, Malfoy."  
"_Alohomora,"_ Lucius muttered, and the doors swung open for a split second, and Lucius dragged Rodolphus onto the train.  
"Nice going," sneered Bellatrix, jabbing Lucius in the chest, and smiling affectionatley at Rodolphus, even though it was entirely his fault.  
"It wasn't Lucius's fault," Narcissa murmured, her long blonde hair falling over her shoulders. She gave a little shake to push it backwards.  
"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure," Rodolphus replied smugly, and taking Bellatrix by the arm, they went off to the compartment they had all shared since first year. Lucius stared at Narcissa greedily, his eyes sweeping over her. "Come on Cissy dearest, we better follow on."  
"You follow on, I'll come when I want to."  
"Now now, don't be so rude. I'll have to teach you some manners, my girl."  
"Since when was I your girl? And since when have you told me what to do?" She swept past him, knocking his shoulder delibratley. He frowned slightly and caught her arm, which was suprisingly thin. "Since I've wanted to."

She pulled free, and stalked off, cloak swishing. She passed her cousin's compartment, and opening the door, poked her head through. "Hey, Sirius. I heard you left your house."  
"Well, yeah," Sirius replied, looking quite handsome as he flopped against the windowsill. "I couldn't stand another moment with all that pure blood mania being thrown around." He sighed, and glanced at his Slytherin cousin with curiousity. She smiled in response, and took Wormtail's seat. He was suprisingly vacant, but she didn't let that bother her.  
"Reg told me you were blasted off the family portrait," Narcissa mentioned with a hint of sympathay. She had always had a soft spot for her cousin, and his friends. She didn't paticularly know why. Sirius grinned at her. "Yeah, yeah I was."  
"And that doesn't bother you?" Narcissa looked slightly suprised.  
"Nah," Sirius replied earnestly, "It's just a portrait." Narcissa thought this was rather brave if it was all an act, and focused her attention on Remus Lupin. She rather liked him, despite his little affliction, because he was so wise and sympathetic, constantly there for whoever needed a little guidance and help. "How are you, Remus?"  
"Rather well, thanks Narcissa," Lupin replied pleasantly, ruffling his dark hair carelessly. "Defence against the Dark Arts should be good this year though."  
"How come?" Narcissa asked, leaning against her cousin and ruffling his hair in a way she used to do when they were smaller.  
"Well," Lupin replied, choosing his words carefully, "I hear we get to learn more about the unforgivable curses. Apparently," a trace of disgust flickered across his face, "we may have to perform them."  
"On people?" James spoke at last, looking rather disgruntled. "Bloody hell, I swear You-Know-Who has infiltrated the school system."  
"Don't be silly," Lupin replied reassuringly, "just things like spiders and little insects. I guess your friends will be excelling this class."  
Narcissa looked uneasy, but then broke into a glittering smile. "No, no one can ever top your grades, Remus."  
At that moment, the door to their compartment swung open, and there stood Lucius and Severus.  
"Hello Snivellus, not wearing your mums blouse today I see?" Sirius said cruelly, watching Snape shudder slightly, an expression of sadness and humilation tracing his face for a split second. Narcissa frowned at Sirius, an expression clearly telling him to stop there and then.  
"Come on Narcissa - you can do better than this lot." Lucius said smugly, yet looking rather pleading. He shot a glare at James. "Potter."  
"What do you want Malfoy? Being Snivellus' babysitter I see?" James said slyly, whilst Sirius roared with laughter. Remus shook his head slightly, and buried his head in a book.  
"Watch your attitude, Potter," Lucius hissed, "maybe that's why Lily doesn't like you."  
"I hear you still haven't got a girlfriend, Malfoy," James replied sarcastically, "maybe it's because you give the impression that Snivellus is your girlfriend."  
"How dare you, you decieving little blood traitor---"  
"Oh, get over yourself, Malfoy." James said angrily, standing up to his full height and pushing them out of the door. "And stay out - you good for nothing jerks!"  
Narcissa shook her head, her hair falling over her face. "Oh, great James, now do you see what I'm going to put up with when I go back?"  
Remus placed a hand comfortingly on Narcissa's shoulder. "It'll be alright, they'll get over it sooner or later. I promise you."  
Narcissa nodded, still unsure ...


	2. Chapter 2

The rest of the journey to Hogwarts seemed to past undisturbed, and Narcissa rather enjoyed hanging out with her cousin and his friends - in fact, it made her seem rather rebellious. "You know," James remarked, as the train began to slow down, "You're alright - for a _Slytherin._"  
Narcissa chuckled. "And you lot aren't so bad - given you're all _Gryffindors._"

James yawned massively and ruffled his hair. "Where's Wormy?"

Sirius cocked an eyebrow at this sudden debate; he, and the rest of his friends, had seemingly forgotten the whereabouts of Wormtail. He shrugged lightly, watching his reflection for a little while before replying. "Who cares?"  
"Sirius," Remus reprimanded gently, "He's meant to be our friend. However - let us not emphasise the fact he's not here," he said quickly, as James looked at Remus indignantly, "because - we've arrived."  
It took some time to coax Sirius and James off the train, because they were ramsacking the abandoned food trolley, stuffing Pumpkin Pasties and other delicious food into their rucksacks. "Padfoot, Prongs, that's enough!" Remus said sharply, gesturing for them to hurry up. Almost all the boats had left now, just a small reminder of how greedy Sirius and James could be.  
Once they were all together finally (bar Wormtail) they headed off towards the few remaining boats. Narcissa's hair blew in the wind, an icy bitterness seeping through her skin. She knew if her mother and father discovered she was mingling with people outside of her house (and that was putting it nicely) she would probably be thrown out. She shuddered a little.  
"Narcissa." Malfoy spoke grandly, interupting any form of conversation. "I take it you will be sitting with us at dinner? You know," He lowered his voice, whispering into her ear, "You don't have to pretend to like this sadistic lot, you know."  
Narcissa pushed him away. "Get lost, Malfoy." She turned away from him promptly, and he slid his arms around her waist.  
"Come on, Cissy," he purred, "you know you want me really." She slapped his hands away, and with suprising force for her skinny frame, pushed him away so hard that he nearly toppled over. "As IF," she retorted coldly, "and no - I won't be joining you for dinner."  
And with that, she climbed into the boat with Remus, James and Sirius.

"And with that said - let the feast begin!" Dumbledore's majestic voice echoed through the great hall like fire trickling with water, and everything seemed to burst into life. Wormtail was still no were to be seen, but nobody seemed paticularly bothered. Narcissa had half debated joining her Slytherin cronies, but suprised her new Gryffindor friends by sitting with them instead. Dumbledore did not tell her to move back to her own table, he merely raised his wine glass at her in mild appriceation. Narcissa twisted her salad selection without much thought, not feeling paticularly hungry. "Cmon, Narcissa," Sirius said sarcastically, "you're going to waste away if you don't eat properly." And with that said, the three friends piled her plate high with chicken, salad. James got a bit bored with this routine and accidently squirted Tomato sauce all over an unsuspecting Gryffindor. Sirius sniggered with appriceation. Remus sighed slightly, sipping his Pumpkin Juice, hoping to get away so he could start some of his new books he had bought in Diagon Alley. He watched with mild curiousity as Narcissa's Slytherin friends shot her confused looks. Lucius Malfoy did not say anything, he looked stricken with silent fury, pushing his food around on his plate but not eating it.  
"I bet get going." Narcissa said resentfully, "but we're basically in all of the same lessons, so, you know." She picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder, smiling at her cousin and his friends. "See you."  
"Bye Narcissa," James bidded, his mouth spraying yet another unfortunate Gryffindor with salad mixed with fruit. The unsuspecting Gryffindor thwacked him over the head with their book, and rolled their eyes.  
"Yeah - see you." Sirius said with a swagger, looking arrogant. She ruffled his hair affectionatley. It looked like a hairbrush had never come in contact with Sirius's messy hair, but she decided not to point this out.  
"Bye, Narcissa," Lupin said softly, smiling pleasantly at her. She waved at them all, then set off out of the Great Hall. Making her way to the common room, she wondered if she truely could abandon her 'Slytherin Destiny' as Bellatrix called it, to become more respected within all the houses, not just Slytherin. She glanced at the portrait, and murmured, "Dragonskin," to which the portrait replied, "Exactly," and swung open. She stepped in, and was glad to find it marginally empty. Without hestitation, she ran up the stairs to the girls dorms, and sorted herself out with the necessities, shower, teeth brush, get into pjs, and then bed. She was on the fourth step as Bellatrix finally arrived, her face exhilirated. "Wow Cissy," she said sarcastically, flopping down onto her sisters bed, "how did it go with the dorks?"  
"Don't call them that," Narcissa replied softly.  
"I hope you remember your place," Bellatrix sneered, pushing her hair off her face, "You ought to think about whether becoming a blood-traitor is really for you."  
"Don't be ridiculous," Scoffed Narcissa, pulling her quilt around her, her promiment chin sticking out.  
"Well, anyway," Bellatrix stood up, "I hear the dark lord is going to be requiring members." As she said this, she got a rather dreamy yet crazed look in her eyes, her cheeks blushing. "And I'm going to sign up." She looked smugly at her sister, waiting for a response.  
"Sign up for death?" She retorted, turning on her side. She heard Bellatrix sigh with exasperation.  
"No, no, become a death eater. That's what he's calling it - his close group of followers."  
"Night, Bellatrix." Narcissa said pointedly, closing her eyes. Bellatrix murmured the same, making her way over to the showers. Worry overcame Narcissa - what if Bellatrix was actually serious? Signing up for the Dark Lord meant alliegance for eternity - but she supposed Bellatrix would be entirely dedicated; considering she seemed fazed and slightly obsessed with Voldemort now. And with that speculated upon, Narcissa fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

"Good morning, sunshine," Lucius's voice drifted around the Slytherin common room as Narcissa entered, all set for the day ahead of her. She nodded at Lucius without speech, and went to select an Apple from the fruit bowl on the table. "Narcissa - this is getting ridiculous." Lucius's sudden anger from the night before had returned but this time it was no longer silent, he was speaking and his stance was rather intimidating. He stroked her hair patronisingly, "Stay with us, dearest, not with the filthy blood traitors --- oww!"  
Narcissa slapped him hard on his cheek, that was now rather red. "You deserved that," she told him cruelly, and selecting an Apple, she sunk her teeth in and wandered out of the common room. No sooner after she had left, Bellatrix desended along with Rodolphus, Severus, Crabbe, Goyle and Regulus, looking rather smug. "Oh, did you get slapped?" She commented coyly, pointing at Lucius's smarting cheek. He swore angrily at her and turned away, beckoning for his cronies to follow. Bellatrix looked perplexed, but followed her friends and boyfriend admiringly.

Narcissa sat down at the Gryffindor table as pre-mentioned last night, and was warmly welcomed by Sirius. "Hey Narcissa, did you get enough sleep last night?" He asked, his tone delibrating mock concern. "I hope so," she replied, equally sarcastic. He grinned, she grinned. Now they could continue. "Where's Remus - and James," she added hastily, to Sirius's eyebrow raise. "Well - Prongs is still dragging himself out of bed, Moony is still re-arranging his bag for the lessons ahead 'cause James lost his schedule mysteriously but we weren't really suprised, so you know. And, Wormtail is ill." Sirius finished this rather grandly, and rewarded himself by shoving scrambled egg in his mouth.  
"I see - wait, Peter is ill?" Narcissa sipped her drink, raising an eyebrow slightly.

"Yeah, the stupid git has food poisoning or something." Sirius reported, leaning back enough to see Remus and James enter the hall. James sat with Sirius, and Remus sat next to Narcissa. "So - what do we have first lesson?" James interjected rudely, taking a large portion of scrambled egg and toast. Sirius smirked, and then looked enquiringly at Remus.  
"Transfiguration with Professor McGonagall," Remus replied promptly, then smiled warmly at Narcissa, who had reached over and stolen some of James's toast. "And how are you today, Narcissa?"  
"Rather well," she replied, "bar getting cornered by Lucius Malfoy."  
James snorted. "What did the git do - threaten to get Snivellus to wipe his nose on you again, or something as equally pathetic?"  
Narcissa smiled. "Not exactly, James, just told me not to hang out with you lot, so---"  
"What did you do?" James interuppted, shoving toast in his mouth, looking enquiringly at Narcissa with wonder.  
"Slapped him," she replied casually, to which James chuckled with appriceation, toast spraying out of his mouth. Remus looked apologetically at Narcissa, smiling. "My friends aren't the most delightful sites when eating food, Narcissa."  
She grinned in response, taking another slice of James's toast before he could spit it out with laughter again. At that moment, Severus entered the hall, looked at Narcissa sitting with the Gryffindors, and smiled beningly. She waved at him in response.  
"Slimey git," Sirius said with disgust, watching Snape sit down with the Slytherin table, and opening his book and ignoring the mountain of food and drink displayed in front of him. Remus ignored Sirius, but James laughed. Narcissa sighed inwardly. "So - we better get going, then."  
They all stood up, and walked out of the Great Hall together, barely noticing Dumbledore was vacant from the headmasters chair - which could only mean something was seriously wrong.

"Today, you will not be writing essays nor using transfiguration on an animal or human, you will merely be reading through your books assigned to you yesturday evening. You may talk, if you wish, but please," Professor McGonagall looked pointedly at James and Sirius, "Keep it quiet!" McGonagall was not the only one who was pleasantly suprised with Narcissa's flourishing friendships with the three Gryffindors, infact, all of the teachers were rather happy. Narcissa had never been suited to a Slytherin life, but she did enjoy acting as if she had alot of power - and she did, in a way. She was a pureblood - but a blood traitor. She wasn't entirely sure where she stood in this situation, so she decided to make the most of these friendships. Sirius, James, Remus and herself claimed a double table by the window, sunlight flooding through, the sky outside looking suprisingly light, not a cloud in the sky. She could not help but to encourage her cousin's bad behaviour, James's rebellious ways, or Remus. She had caught him looking at her rather intently during their rather passionate, flowing conversation regarding the Dark Arts and what Voldemort was up to, and when she was around him she could not help but to smile, not having a care in the world. "I think," Narcissa told Remus, "That Bellatrix is going to sign up to Voldemort and become a ... oh, what's it called?"  
"Death eater," Remus replied instantly, smiling at Narcissa. She felt her cheeks tint slightly.  
"Yeah --- a Death Eater. She seemed rather passionate about joining him. I'm pretty sure the others," she indicated her old friends lightly, "Are intent on signing up aswell. Even your brother, Sirius."  
Sirius rolled his eyes, giving up pretending to read his book by flinging it onto the table. "That doesn't suprise me," he replied darkly, "He's just like mum and dad - obsessed with being pure and that muggle borns and half bloods should be, well, you know."  
"It's pathetic," James interjected frostily, "pure blood mania if you please! This Voldemort sounds rather immense though - know what I heard?"  
"No - what did you hear James?" Remus asked, curiousity getting the better of him. He leant forward slightly, pressing his fingertips together.  
"That he doesn't have a mum or dad."  
Remus raised an eyebrow at this piece of information. "And you know that how?"  
James shrugged. "I dunno, I overheard a couple Slytherins discussing it, so I listened it before hexing one of the stupid ones - Goyle, I think."  
Narcissa laughed softly. "So it was you who hexed him? I wondered why he looked too _disturbed_ to speak."  
He nodded, then began to watch Lily Evans with mild interest. "She wants me..."  
"Yeah, when you stop hexing people." Sirius told his best friend in amusement. "And will you ever?"  
"Well ..." James said slowly, "Maybe we can make certain exceptions - for Snivellus."  
After attempting to read their books for a little longer, Narcissa noticed that Sirius was becoming restless. He knocked James slightly on the arm, then indicated Snape. He whispered something to James who, in response, snorted with laughter. Sirius pointed his wand at Snape and murmured, "_Langlock_!" as McGonagall began to quiz Snape about his previous essay, but after the hex had been spoken, Snape could not speak, he merely grabbed his throat and couldn't speak, indicating that. He spluttered, heaved, and banged his head on the desk in agitation at being hexed. McGonagall could, unfortunatley for Snape, not find the culprit, and dragged Snape off to the hospital wing, yelling over her shoulder that class was dismissed. "Nice one Sirius!" James was still laughing as they left the classroom. Lily Evans swept past him.   
"At least it's not you hexing for a change, James." She called over her shoulder, walking off with a girl called Mary. James grinned massively, looking rather pleased with himself. "So, what do we have now?"  
"Potions," replied Sirius unenthusastically, heading off to the Dungeons. Remus smiled at Narcissa again, and she returned it, before saying, "I wonder what sort of potion we'll be making today?"  
Remus shrugged. "Not sure, to be honest with you."  
"Oh, you don't know this, but you know almost all our lesson plannings?" She teased, her blonde hair falling over her face a little as she laughed. He blushed a little then gestured Sirius and James who were at least several feet infront of them. "We better follow on."  
"Yeah - we simply can't be late for Slughorn." Narcissa replied sarcastically, and in suprise Lupin laughed. They both picked up speed and headed to the dungeons.


	4. Chapter 4

Potions was fairly entertaining, because James had totally ruined his entire potion and the consequences of the sticky liquid on Professor Slughorn weren't pretty. However, the rather odd professor did not seem to care, but roared with laughter, and dismissed the class ten minutes early for break. "James, was that delibrate?" Sirius asked, amusement flickering across his face as they approached the lake, settling down for an enjoyable half hour free time. James gave the mere image of a nod, and Sirius laughed. "Nice one!"  
Remus sighed. "You shouldn't encourage him, Sirius ..."  
Narcissa laughed softly, her eyes closing as she breathed in the warm breath of sunshine. "Ever the mature one, James," she commented lazily, enjoying the warm sun on her face. It truely was a perfect day.

Remus opened his bag and leant back against an old oak tree, and selecting a book, he began to read. He managed a whole sentence before being tormented by James. "Cmon, Moony, take a break from studying for just one day. The day is perfect, so enjoy it, don't hide away."  
"Was perfect," Remus corrected, putting his book back in his bag. "Look who's just arrived, dear James."  
"Excellent," said Sirius, "It's Snivellus."  
"Leave him be," Narcissa interjected sharply, "I still haven't forgotten what you did to him after the Charms OWL exam."

"I forgot about that," Sirius said reminiscently, smiling with newfound amusement. Narcissa's thoughts drifted to what would happen if he parents discovered she was befriending Gryffindors and basically doing what Sirius did - which was becoming a blood traitor? She shuddered slightly under the dazzling sunshine. She would too, be blasted off her Aunt's portrait, but even if that did not bother her cousin, it would most certainly bother her. She couldn't quite understand why it would bother her so; her family consisted of pompous gits, but still. They were her family. She sighed, edging herself up on her elbows, opening her eyes. She was a little suprised to see Remus watching her curiously.

"So, have you spoken to any of them?"  
"I ... what?" Her brain seemed to turn to mush, forgetting completely what Remus was trying to ask. He smiled benignly at her, a hand momentarily smoothing his hair, not quite as messy as his friends hair was, but still not completely neat.

"Your friends," he pointed out quietly, "Rodolphus, Regulus, Crabbe, Goyle, Severus, Lucius - and your sister, Bellatrix."

"No," she admitted after a while, twirling a strand of blonde hair around her finger nervously. "I talk to Severus a little, but not really the others. Bellatrix talks to me when she wants to discuss how ... how terribly 'amazing' and 'powerful' Voldemort is."  
Remus nodded. "That is to be understood. I disagree on her description of Voldemort being amazing; but he is however powerful-"  
"Oh, shush Moony," Sirius yawned, watching James play with the stolen Snitch with mild interest, "You talk like a book sometimes."  
Remus blushed, but Narcissa interuptted. "I didn't know books could talk."  
"Dear Cissy," Sirius said carefully, to delibratley annoy his cousin, "Some books CAN talk."  
"Don't call me that," she grinned, grabbing Remus's book without thinking, "can they also do this?" And she whacked Sirius over the head. James roared with laughter at Sirius wavering slightly, but then his usual swagger returned. "Oh I dunno, _Cissy_, can they?" and he retrieved his own book, and whacked her with it.

"Sirius Black!" The sharp voice of Professor McGonagall stopped any form of book hitting. "Do not use your new Transfiguration book as a form of weapon! Don't let me see that again!" And with that, she dissapeared into the castle, looking haughty.  
"I won't let you see," Sirius replied sarcastically, but put his book back just in case. Narcissa realised she was still holding Remus's book and offered it to him. "Er, sorry about that."  
Remus smiled. "Don't worry - I think he needs that sometimes." As he retrieved his book, his fingers gently brushed against Narcissa's, and she blushed. James was oblivious to this mild flirtation going on right under his nose, and he picked up a stone and threw it into the link. "Hey, Sirius," James smirked, "Suppose you could do me a favour?"  
"Probably not," Sirius sighed, but then smiled. "What sort, Prongs?"  
"Tell Lily how good I've become lately-"

Sirius snorted.  
"And, how I like her-"  
"What's in it for me?" Sirius demanded, looking at James with a gleaming challenge set in his twinkling blue eyes.  
"How about I do your homework for you for a day?" James wheedled, looking hopeful.  
"Deal!" Sirius beamed triumphantly. "I'll do it tomorrow, first thing during Defence against the Dark Arts."

Remus moved his hand away from Narcissa's when Sirius and James finally turned around, and neither of them cottoned on. "Speaking of which, we have that in ten minutes. I can't wait."  
"Trust you Moony," Sirius said affectionatley, catching the Snitch before James could, which was saying something as James was the Gryffindor Seeker. Narcissa pondered. "I wonder who'll be teaching us."  
Remus shrugged once more. "Not a set teacher, I hear. It'll probably be a supply teacher." He smiled once more at Narcissa, but his smile was cut short when Lucius and Bellatrix approached.  
"Narcissa," Lucius said pleasantly, his eyes sweeping greedily over her body. "Want to be partners for next class?"  
"No," replied Narcissa shortly, squinting up at him, the dazzling sunshine becoming more and more bright by the second. Lucius did not take this rejection very well. Bellatrix crossly acknowledged the group with a sarcastic eyebrow raise. Her eyes rested on Sirius and she pouted. "Your brother talked about you earlier, Sirius."  
"Doesn't suprise me," Sirius replied loftily, staring at Bellatrix with controlled dislike.

"Yeah, well, Cissy, are you going to acknowledge our existence or not?" Bellatrix folded her arms across her chest, still pouting.  
"I am acknowledging you, Bella. I'm just not sitting with you in classes or lunch, but," she held a hand up in defence as her sister began to rattle something off, "I listen long enough to you to know how much you desire Voldemort."  
Bellatrix's mouth opened then closed, deciding it was better not to speak.  
"Come on Lucius," she said crossly, turning away from them.

"Nice one, _Cissy,_" taunted Sirius playfully, then high-fiving her. "God, you're friends with such jerks."  
"Bella is alright sometimes, but Lucius is just ... I don't know. He makes me feel uncomfortable."  
A great bell sounded, which indicated it was time for class. "Cmon, lets go."


	5. Chapter 5

**OK so someone (Steph :P lol) asked me why Narcissa reminded the three mauraders what they had done after the last charms in OWLS. now - JKRowling mentioned the maurders closing in on snape after the defence against the dark arts exam, but they did this too, for a different reason. enough explanation; read on!**

Narcissa could not concentrate on this class - for several reasons in paticular. One was Dumbledore was teaching the lesson for that day, and although Dumbledore and herself were on friendly terms, he had restricted her from sitting with her friends. "No, Narcissa, sit with Mr.Malfoy today." She opened her mouth to object but Dumbledore gave her a slight eyebrow raise which silenced any form of argument, so picking up her bag glumly, she went to sit next to Lucius, who looked rather smug. "Hello, dearest," he smirked, raising an eyebrow at her appricieatevely. She rolled her eyes and turned away from him. She saw Sirius mouthing "HA-HA" at her, so she stuck her tongue out and crossed her eyes.  
"Quite an alluring look, Miss Black," Dumbledore commented as he surveyed the class, "but not right now, if you mind." She smiled apologetically at him and began to listen as he discussed, with some hestiance, the use of the unforgivable curses. Narcissa listened and was interested, but not as interested as her sister or friends. Bellatrix was scribbling notes down excitedly. Dumbledore coughed slightly. "Bellatrix, I have not asked you to take any notes regarding the three unforgiveable curses, am I correct?"  
"Yes, sir - but I'm really interested in them." Bellatrix replied, a scowl disorting her relatively pretty face. Dumbledore inclined his head at her words, and considered her for a few moments over his half moon spectacles. "I take it you are passionate about the dark arts, Bellatrix?"  
"But, of course professor - the dark arts is one of the most fasincating subjects around!"

"I see, I see," he murmured to nobody in paticular. He allowed Bellatrix to resume taking notes at top speed, mildly fasincated at the girl, whilst he told evil yet great stories, about wizards and witches whom had been attacked by one of the unforgiveable curses. Near the end of the class, Dumbledore's last few words were rather grave. "And any of you who desire joining the dark side," he glanced at Bellatrix and Regulus mainly, "it is not an enjoyable task."  
"You speak as if you served for him, Professor," Bellatrix sneered, looking put out that he had tried to critisice Voldemort. Dumbledore did not berate the dark haired witch for not only contridicting the matter but insulting him, he merely smiled.  
"I was at Hogwarts when he was." He told them simply, "I taught him for one of his classes." The class looked eager to know more, but at that prescice moment, the bell rung, and Dumbledore silently signalled them to all leave. Narcissa immediatley went over to join James, Sirius and Lupin, when Dumbledore interuppted any formation of conversation. "Mr Potter, Black, Lupin and Miss Black - Mr Pettigrew will be returning tomorrow morning. I am sure you will be happy with his return." And with a smile, he left the class without another word.  
"Yeah right!" snorted Sirius incredulously, "lets hope Wormy gets food poisoning again." James and Narcissa laughed, and even Remus couldn't help smiling. It was lunchtime now, so of they all headed to the Great Hall.

Narcissa didn't feel paticularly hungry, but she brushed that aside when she saw the delicious looking food waiting for her. She sat down at the Gryffindor table once more; she was acusstomed to it now. Remus sat next to her, his arm briefly brushing against hers. She selected a sandwich and pressed it to her lips, and was suprised at how delicious it was. She hadn't appriceated food for a long time. Remus watched her with amusement. "You need to eat more, Narcissa," he pretended to be cross with her, but he couldn't stop his eyes shining. "Give me a chance and I will," she replied, finishing off her sandwich.  
Five minutes had barely passed when Bellatrix wandered into the great hall, made her way distastefully towards the Gryffindor table, and whispered to her sister to come outside. Something had happened, clearly. Motioning she'd be right back to her friends, Narcissa stood up and left the great hall with Bellatrix. "What's wrong?"  
"What isn't?" Bellatrix replied passionatley, her eyes gleaming. "The Dark Lord is sending for recruitments."  
"Meaning?" Narcissa replied dully, an eyebrow raised.  
"_Meaning_," Bellatrix smirked, adding extra emphasis, "That he wants more followers. So, Reg, Rod, Lucius, Crabbe, Snape, Goyle and I will be going to sign up tonight. We're skipping dinner to go meet him in Hogsmeade - it's all sorted." She finished in a flourish, looking bright and happy. "Isn't that fantastic?" Narcissa looked appalled.  
"No! Why on earth is Severus signing up - he can't be a death eater - and nor can you or Lucius."  
"I thought you didn't care about Lucius," Bellatrix grinned maliciously, her eyes glittering.  
"As a friend I do," Narcissa corrected her sister, "and I most defintley do not want Sev or you to sign up. I can't bare it. What will mother and father say about it?"  
"Who cares?" Bellatrix said in a singsong voice, skittering awa, leaving Narcissa stare at an empty space.

A few moments later she pulled herself together and re-entered the great hall, and went to sit down again. She selected a sandwich but did not bother eating it. "So, what did your stupid sister say?" James asked loudly through a mouthful of sandwiches, causing a few people to stare at him.

"Just that she's going to sign up for Voldemort's army tonight - with Severus, Crabbe, Goyle, Lucius, Rodolphus and your brother, Sirius." Narcissa replied mechnically, terror seizing her. What the hell where they playing at? She cracked her knuckles, feeling sick to her stomach.

"Doesn't suprise me," Sirius replied loftily, "Reg was always desperate to get in good books with Voldemort, so, you know. Not suprised about Crabbe or Goyle either," he added, selecting a few chocolate frogs that appeared out of no were, "They're so stupid they probably won't realise what they're comitting themselves to. As for Snivellus, Voldemort won't keep him for long unless Snivellus invests in some Shampoo that actually works. And, Lucius, I wouldn't really be suprised either, but I don't think being a death eater would suit him," Sirius swallowed the remaining chocolate frog, "and your sister has always been eccentric, hasn't she?"  
Narcissa nodded, still worried. "Doesn't it bother you about Reg, Sirius?"  
"Nope," Sirius replied darkly, "It'll please mum and dad to no end how their little Regulus is turning out!" He scoffed, shoving more food in his mouth as if in agitation. "I second what Sirius said," Added James helpfully, looking sympathetic towards Narcissa. Remus placed a hand on her arm making her jump slightly, but then relax. His hand was suprisingly warm and soothed her. She looked enquiringly at him. "Well, maybe Voldemort won't be interested in them, Narcissa," he reassured, "chin up." She smiled at him, and restricted the urge to wrap her arms around his neck for a hug.

And now ... and now to wait.


	6. Chapter 6

The next two lessons were free periods, and then it would be Quidditch practice later on in the evening. Sirius had suggested they all make a trip into Hogsmede seeing as they had nothing better to do, and so that was the plan. Eventually, when they had arrived in Hogsmede, an icy bitterness closed in on them. James shudded. "I swear, it's them bloody dementors."  
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Why would dementors be near Hogwarts?" They approached the Three Broomsticks and entered; the barman looking up suspiciously. "No school?" He queried, rubbing a hand over his gold teeth.  
"Free periods," replied James with what he imagined to be a charming smile. The barman looked suspicious for a split second, but then relented, serving them up free Butterbeers. Grabbing a table near the warm log fire, the four began to discuss, much to Narcissa's discomfort, Voldemort.  
"Personally," James said through a mouthful of Butterbeer, "if he really is the greatest wizard of all time, then why the bloody hell does he need followers?"

"Quite simple," Remus replied simply, "because, should he not succeed, he will want them to take the blame - not him. And, because some are so stupid-"  
"Like my cousin, your sister-" Sirius interuppted, looking at Narcissa.  
"-they will do what he says," finished Remus, glancing at Sirius and Narcissa with wonder. Narcissa felt her cheeks burn - was it from the warm, blazing fire, or was it because of ...

"I'm so bored," Sirius whined, slamming his head on the table in agitation. Narcissa and James exchanged a smirk. Sirius sat up, rubbing his dark brown hair with wonder. "You know - that actually hurt more than I intended it to ..." The barman glanced over and tutted, no longer mesmerized by cleaning the same glass over and over again, keeping an eye on the four seventh years.

"I wonder," Narcissa said, breaking her silence, "what Voldemort and his death eaters will be getting up to."  
"You sound curious, Cissy," teased Sirius, leaning back in his chair. Narcissa thought it was remarkable he didn't fall and break his neck or something. She thwacked him on the arm.  
"Well - I am," she admitted, clasping and unclasping her hands. "Considering my sister, cousin and old friends will be serving him, so, I was just worrying, I mean, thinking, you know ..." she trailed off, looking at Sirius with wonder. How could he honestly not care about his brother?  
"Listen, Narcissa," Sirius said, as if reading her mind. "Regulus and I never got along. It's like - I care about him, but not in the way I should. It'll be alright." He smiled reassuringly at his cousin. Still not entirely convinced, she nodded and took a slurp of Butterbeer. Remus continued to survey her with some thought, before focusing his attention on the now empty glass of mug infront of him. Narcissa glanced at him, and he was looking back, his smile radiating. After their Butterbeer's, they trudged around the shops, mainly in bordeom, when it happened. They were looking at the shrieking shack, when everything went cold. Narcissa's insides turned to ice, and her hand on the fence would of frozen had Sirius not tugged her away from it. Turning mechnically, she saw a Dementor hovering in front of her. But before it could do anything, all she saw was Remus point his wand at it and yell, "_EXPECTO PATRONUM!"_ and a force of silver coloured energy flew out of his wand and pushed the Dementor far away, until it dissapeared entirely. Narcissa trembled. "You can produce a full patronus?"  
"Of course he can," James told her proudly, "he is the best in our defence against the dark arts class, after all, so it's to be expected, isn't it? Thanks for that Moony. Them things are horrible."  
"You can say that again," Sirius murmured, shivering. The sun began to descend as he spoke, and snowflakes began to drift from the sky. Everything seemed to go back to normal once the dementor's presence had been evicted; a much warmer atmosphere in it's place. Narcissa looked beesechingly at Remus. "You saved our lives ..."  
"No big thing," Remus shrugged lightly, with a trace of a smile. "Now - where to next?"

After watching James practice and perfect his already immaculate skills, they all marched in to dinner. Bellatrix, Lucius, Snape, Goyle, Crabbe, Rodolphus and Regulus were unsuprisingly missing. She must of winced slightly, because Lupin placed a reassuring hand on her arm, reminding her it would be okay. She could only hope so. She ate some food, watching with mild interest as Sirius tried to hex a young Slytherin. Narcissa glanced up at the table where all the teachers sat - and saw Dumbledore's chair was once again vacant. "Where's Dumbledore gone?" She queried, looking curiously at Sirius, who shrugged. "Gone to join Voldemort, I suspect - kidding!" he added hastily when he saw his cousins expression. She stood up rather abruptly. "Narcissa, I was joking." Sirius said pleadingly. She looked at her cousin's handsome face, and let her own face relax into a smile. "I know," she replied, to which Sirius relaxed immediatley. "I'm just tired, so I think I'll be off."  
"Don't dwell on it, Narcissa," Remus advised, glancing at her. "Night night."  
"Sleep tight," said James with a wicked smile,  
"Don't let the ghosts bite." Sirius added.

Narcissa looked amused.  
"Ghosts don't bite, dear cousin."  
"Exactly," Sirius replied, "so - go get some rest." He kissed her forehead affectionatley, then shoved her. "Go on - you're starting to make me scared." Narcissa was slightly suprised - her cousin was never usually affectionate towards her. He must really care about her, deep down. And, at that moment, she became glad she had a so called blood-traitor as her cousin and one of her best friends.

She was waiting. She knew what was coming.  
Narcissa sat up in bed, attempting to read a book Remus had let her borrow with some enjoyment, but her attention was brought to a sudden halt when, from the shadows, appeared Bellatrix, a crazed look in her eye. "Voldemort," she began, her voice silky, "Was only too keen to let me become a death eater - he approved straight away, I should say. We are getting marked after we leave school, but we'll be having a practice at what it's like to be a death eater." Her eyes gleamed, and Narcissa pulled the quilt closer to her chin.   
"Practice, as in-"  
"Using the cruciatus curse," Bellatrix replied simply, "On unsuspecting Muggles. After they've been tortured, we place a simple memory charm on them, and Merlin's beard - they won't know what's hit them. Voldemort was curious as to why two of the Black sisters were not interested in being recruited - so I told him your studies were more important. He seemed to approve," she paused, glancing into the long mirror by her bed, which stirred slightly, "and I told him dear Andromeda was in a similiar position - coming out with O's in almost everything - bar the dark arts, which he was dissapointed about, and-"  
"And the others," Narcissa interrupted, shivering, "were they accepted?"  
"Well - of course. He was dithering about Lucius, Goyle and Crabbe, but he accepted me right away. Said I was perfect - and rather pretty for a death eater, so he said he'd have to sort that. You'd love him Narcissa, he's so _charming_ ..."  
Narcissa felt rather sleepy all of a sudden. Bellatrix took the hint, rather uncannily, and got ready for bed in silence. Darkness fell over the dorm, and the mirror said into the darkness, "The dark lord never was one to recieve subtle hints."  
"Shut up," said Narcissa groggily. The mirror replied "Naturally," and with that she fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Let's fast forward a month.  
It was Halloween now. Sirius, James, Remus and Narcissa were spectating the shrieking shack, their cold hands being warmed by the bottles of Butterbeer they were holding. Wormtail had accidently touched an acid during potions class first period, and so he was confined to bed rest. Narcissa was rather pleased - Peter Pettigrew was alright at times, but he was so desperate to fit in and to keep up with his so called friends, that it was rather annoying to watch. Sirius and James had transformed - Stag and Dog standing side by side. They wandered off together, their footprints no longer visible in the snow, as it began to fall heavier. Abnormally large snowflakes drifted down and settled in Narcissa's hair. Remus looked mildly amused. "Your hair ..." he gestured quietly, approaching her. His face was illuminated from the winter sun, and his blue eyes seemed to sparkle. His hand reached her hair, and he brushed away the snowflakes with soft, delicate strokes. She froze, he was too close now. She had a constant ongoing argument in her head, three quarters of her mind encouraging her to take it to the next step, one quarter reminding her of 'were her priorities lay.' "I ..." Narcissa began, but was interrupted. Not by Remus, however.

"Cor! We've just nicked - I mean borrowed a whole load of Butterbeer." Sirius said cheerfully, approaching with James, carrying a box of Butterbeer. Remus sighed inwardly and moved away from Narcissa. She sighed too. She could slap her cousin sometimes for being so - RANDOM. The way he appeared out of no were sometimes was rather uncanny.  
"I ... I guess we better go back - we don't want to miss the feast." Remus advised, still looking rather put out. Sirius raised an eyebrow at Narcissa who returned his silent queery with a smile, and then punched him on the arm softly.  
So, Sirius and James taking turns to carry the box of Butterbeers, they made their way back to Hogwarts. They were not far from the castle, when they saw Bellatrix sneak in, looking rather frazzled. Her clothes were all out of sync; and something told Narcissa she had not been fooling around with Rodolphus. Sirius shared this view by pointing at Bellatrix and snorting with laughter. Narcissa informed the others she'd be back with them in a moment, and ran off after her deranged sister.  
"Bella - BELLA!" She called, running after Bellatrix at impressive speed. Her sister turned, her lips pouted, hair out of place. She gave an odd smile towards Narcissa.  
"Hello, Cissa," Bellatrix spoke as if in a trance, a crazed look in her eye. "And how are you today?" She chuckled at herself.  
"Are you drunk?" Narcissa shot at her. "And what have you been doing?"  
"E-enjoying a Fire Whisky with Voldee-mortee." Bellatrix hicupped. Narcissa rolled her eyes, gesturing for her sister to continue. "Don't tell Rod," Bellatrix whispered suddenly, now completely serious, "But-"  
"You never?" Narcissa prompted, her worst fear waiting to be confirmed by her tipsy sister.  
"Yeah - Merlin's beard, he was _fantastic_. But - please don't tell Rod!"  
"Whatever. That is disgusting. He may be your master - but - oh what the hell," Narcissa shot at Bellatrix, who was now running up the stairs, hiccuping. Narcissa walked over to her friends and cousin, who had now appeared in the entrance hall. Remus gave her an enquiring look, but did not press the matter. It was as if he was waiting for confirmation that he could. Narcissa sighed inwardly, and then told them in a quiet voice. James rolled about with laughter, saying that it was disgusting. Sirius, however, was more dignified about the affair. "Bloody Hippogriff," he muttered, as they skulked into the great hall.  
"And what," Narcissa asked, "does a Hippogriff have in common with my sister?"  
"Well - they're both rather ugly," James answered promptly, "And rather stupid ..." he trailed off as he saw Lily, and wandered over to her, mesmerized, so it seemed. Narcissa and Lily were on speaking terms now - and Lily had shared some quite private things with Narcissa, such as family life, her feelings about James, and so forth. Her feelings were clearly confirmed as James wrapped her in a warm hug, happily. Lily grinned up at him, and turned away. "See you later, James."

"Yeah ... see you." He called after her. He turned back to the group, a big smile on his face. "I'm going out with Lily. She said as long as I stop hexing people, we'll be pretty good together." Remus chuckled to himself but did not contradict his best friend. Instead, they all entered the Great Hall, and sat down to some rather delicious looking Halloween food. Sirius was amusing his cousin by drinking a whole bottle of Butterbeer in a single gulp. "Impressive," she chortled, sipping her own Butterbeer, surveying him with approval. James was rather happy, flicking food at unfortunate students - and - McGonagall.  
"James Potter!" She shrieked, as a bit of meat landed on her face, "If I catch you throwing meat one more time ... WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT WAS AN ACCIDENT?"  
"Time to go, methinks." Sirius snorted, flipping his hair out of his eyes. McGonagall luckily let James off as it was Halloween. They reached the entrance hall again, and James glanced at his watch. "I don't feel like going to the dorms ... anyone fancy a quick, unoffical game of Quidditch?"  
"Yeah!" Narcissa and Sirius replied enthusastically, then exchanging looks. Narcissa had not played Quidditch for a good while, but she was pretty good at catching the Snitch.  
"That's settled then," James smirked. "And Moony will be ...?"  
"Watching from the Bleachers," he replied, his eyes twinkling, "finishing off the butterbeer."  
"That's the spirit!" James cried enthusastically, patting Remus on the back.  
Ten minutes later, Narcissa was darting about in the sky, laughing. She had not felt so free, so young, so _alive_ for such a long time. She was quicker than her cousin when it came to racing, but James was far by the best. His technique was remarkable, his catches of the Snitch flawless. They spent an hour in the sky, feeling the wind on their faces and in their hair, and never had they felt so refreshed. Even Remus, who was reading and drinking countless amounts of Butterbeer seemed happy.


	8. Chapter 8

It was just a few days before Christmas, and as a special treat to Seventh years, they were allowed a trip, via floo network, into Diagon Alley. Peter Pettigrew would be accompanying them, much to Narcissa's dislike. Things had been rocky over the last few months since Halloween, a couple of murders had taken place - murders of people she had known, or had spoken to only a while ago. It was terribly unbecoming, and with that said, Narcissa was rather happy to get out of Hogwarts to do some shopping. Sirius and Peter would be with Narcissa, they had decided, and later on they would meet up with Remus, James and Lily.

Standing in the old fashioned grate in the headmasters office, Narcissa selected a handful of floo powder, before saying very clearly - "Diagon Alley!" and dissapearing into the Emerald flames. They arrived with a bumped head and dirty faces, and Sirius speculated his suprise when Peter actually used the Floo network correctly. "So - where to first?" Narcissa asked, a hand automatically wiping down her dust-covered clothes. Without hestitation, Sirius replied, "Gringotts of course, Cissy." And so that was settled. After withdrawing a substansiual amount of money from Narcissa's savings, they moved along in the little cart with a rather sour faced goblin, and collected Sirius's money. The last storage they went to was Peters, and both cousins were suprised at the small fortune he had glistening from his storage. After leaving what appeared to be a never ending chamber, their faces welcomed the warm winter sun with ease. "Right - what do you both want for Christmas?" Narcissa asked lazily, rubbing her hands together in a hurried attempt to keep unfrozen. "Well," Sirius hinted, "can we check the Quidditch shop ...?"  
"Sirius," Narcissa scolded playfully, "you already have a ton of brooms."  
He shrugged in response, his eyes gleaming. She sighed and dragged both boys to the shop. In the tinted window cleverly designed to look as if snowflakes were falling across the crystal-clear panes, there was a brand new model of the best racing broom yet. "A Nimbus?" Sirius gasped, and then gazed at the price label. "It's three hundred galleons."

"You want?" Queried Narcissa, an eyebrow raised. Her hand indistinctively slid into her pocket and her fingers wrapped around her big bag of money. Sirius looked rather pleased for a moment, but then shook his head, his dark hair falling over his face. "James is more of a fanatic than me," he said simply, "but it is tempting." His gaze returned to the polished broomstick.  
"Tell you what," Narcissa said, "I'll buy you BOTH a Nimbus."  
"Merlins beard - are you serious?" Sirius threw his arms around his cousin happily. "Cissy - you're the best!" His hair tickled her face and she started giggling, hugging him back. "Sure - why not?" And with that entered the store, and placed an order for two Nimbus's to arrive on Christmas day, one to James Potter, and one to Sirius Black. The fact Narcissa had just spent six hundred galleons did not paticularly bother her; she had always been modicodled within her families vast fortune. She ordered Peter some new robes, a new wand and a quill, and, leaving the two boys to drool over the Quidditch supplies, she made her way to Flourish & Blotts. She knew exactly what to buy for Remus. Examining the shelves, she saw a brand new, autographed set of Defence Against the Dark Arts books, encrusted with jewels down the spine. There was only one collection left - and she bit her lip slightly when she saw how much it cost. Two hundred galleons. Still not enough metaphorically, she'd spent another hundred on her cousin and his best friend. She'd only spent roughly one hundred galleons on Peter, but she felt complied to spend a fair amount on Remus. And that was when she saw it. An hilarous, original copy of _The Werewolf_, a fun chatty story about how "evil" Werewolves were. Remus had mentioned to her how that was the only story he appriceated; and so she bought it for him. For Lily, she purchased a rather large ginger cat and some Chocolate frogs. The cat was to arrive on Christmas day.   
With a sinking heart, Narcissa realised she had not bought anything for her family. In a mad dash, she bought a diamond necklace for her mother, some interesting books for her father, new books for her little sister - and for Bellatrix? A smile crept onto Narcissa's face as she saw a tiara, encrusted with jewels. _Yes_, she thought bitterly, _this will suit you royally, Bella._  
And with that; her shopping was finished. She wandered over to the ice cream parlour, were her cousin, friends and Lily were all waiting. "You're not carrying much," teased Lily, an eyebrow raised. "Sure you've got everything?"  
"Oh, but of course!" Narcissa replied, raising her own eyebrow amiably, and then smiling. She glanced at Remus, only to see he was grinning right back at her. Since that "incident" from Halloween, not much else had happened. They had remained exceedingly good friends - but no more encounters had occured. She wondered if he still even liked her that way - but his grin pushed her doubts aside. He was so charming, in his own little way.

Christmas day.  
Narcissa left Bellatrix's gift at the end of her bed, and tiptoed off, already dressed, to the Gryffindor common room. After successfully giving the password, she wandered in to the common room, and was flung at by Lily. "Narcissa! A cat! I wonder what mum and dad will say, I've _always _wanted a cat, and now I've got one!" She thrust neatly wrapped presents into Narcissa's arms, and then danced off to show off her new cat. Narcissa opened the gifts to reveal a book by Snowdela Fox, entitled "The girl and the gits." Narcissa laughed in amusement, and was pleased to discover her other gift was some Chocolate Frogs. At that moment, Sirius and James appeared with Peter. "Cor," said James, "Thanks Narcissa! Must appriceated."  
"Yeah," Sirius added, "Thanks - wouldn't of guessed it at all, dear cousin." His hair flopped rather handsomely over his eyes, until he blew it out of the way, his dark eyes watching his cousin. "Oh - nearly forgot ..." they handed her their own gifts. Sirius's was a beautiful pearl necklace, with her name enscribed on the silver chain. "Aww - Sirius -"  
"And don't forget mine," James interuppted, putting his own rather badly wrapped gift into Narcissa's hands. James's present was a beautiful photo albumn, jewels glittering around it. "We put some photos in already - of us lot, you know."  
"Aww, thank you ..." Narcissa's smile could light up a funeral right about now - she was so happy. Peter's gift to her were rather amusing. A box of biscuits. Opening it, she saw a shiny ring admist all the biscuits, dazzling as it caught the light.  
"Where's Remus?" Narcissa enquired, placing all her presents down on the coffee table, before straightening up again. Sirius and James exchanged a sly smirk, before pushing her towards the portrait. "He said - to meet him outside the grounds." And with that said and done, Narcissa found herself outside the common room. She gave a quick glance at her outfit, the pearl necklace from Sirius now hanging around her neck, along with the ring from Peter on her right hand added a paticular look to her. She was wearing a black jumper over dark blue jeans, wearing casual white trainers. She had a rather muggle look about her, which made her amused to an extent.

Leaving the castle, she trudged across thick snow. An owl swooped past with a hoot; she recongised it to be Bellatrix's own owl. She also noticed it was carrying a parcel that was rather small around it's leg, and a small note. One guess to whom it was to? That's right. It was clearly Voldemort. Narcissa doubted Bellatrix would be sending such a small gift to her parents, and because she was so infutuated with Voldemort, it made perfect sense. As Narcissa began to contemplate what could be in the parcel, she bumped into somebody, as they bumped into her. She groaned, she was such a klutz at times, lost in her own thoughts. "Sorry-" she began, only to be cut off.  
"I - I got your gifts." Remus said quietly, his eyes lowering to the snow on the ground. She realised - he must be shy. She had not really thought about it before, because he was so alive around his friends. But now, they both alone, and the thrill of it characterized the air. "They were rather good, Narcissa - especially the werewolf book. That made me laugh a fair bit, actually."  
She smiled. "I'm glad you appriceated them."  
He returned the smile, his gaze lingering. "Oh - I did."  
Mechnically, she stepped closer. He did too. They were so close now; his nose brushed against hers slightly. She could see how dilated his pupils were, every eyelash that flickered when he blinked. Her own cheeks began to burn despite the freezing air, and before she knew it - they kissed. She was lost in her own world now; suspended in time as they kissed . . .


	9. Chapter 9

After they had kissed, Remus and Narcissa walked around the grounds, holding hands and talking about things. The morning sky grew lighter, the few stars that had remained dissapearing within a cloud. Eventually, they slowed down and stopped by an old tree, it's branches swaying in the light wind. "I think I love you," Narcissa told him dreamily, her eyes sparkling.  
His own eyes appeared to be glittering too. "Only think?" He leant forward and pressed his lips on hers, pulling her into a tender embrace. His hands held her waist, her arms wrapping around his neck.  
"WIT-WOO!"  
They broke apart to see the taunting faces of Sirius and James watching them. "Did you get a photo of that, Padfoot?" James asked, picking up a clump of snow and throwing it over his shoulder carelessly. It ricoched off Wormtail's head, causing him to fall over, but James didn't seem paticularly bothered.  
"Think so," replied Sirius, checking his camera. "Yep, got it right here."  
"Seeing as you went to the trouble Sirius," Narcissa said sarcastically, "we might aswell see it." Sirius grinned in response and held up the photograph. Narcissa squinted slightly. It showed her speaking to Remus with a dreamy expression, then him replying, before kissing her. Then, there was the flash of the camera, and they turned, laughing to face Sirius and James.  
"Wow, that's pretty good." Remus commented with a ghost of a smile.  
"You can put it in your - photo book thing, that I gave you," said James helpfully, pushing his glasses up his nose. Narcissa smiled warmly at him, nodding in agreeance.  
"Bloody hell - it took old Prongs simply AGES to cotton on about Remus and you, Narcissa," Sirius started.  
"Yeah - we went on about it for a long time to him," continued James.  
"But hopefully, we won't have to keep going on at him anymore." Sirius finished, looking smugly at Remus.  
Remus inclined his head, smiling. "No - no you won't."  
James yawned. "So, are you two going out now?" He put his hand in his pocket to retrieve a Chocolate Frog. Pressing it to his lips, he took a large, noisy bite out of it, before surveying the two again.  
"Narcissa?" Remus glanced at her, an eyebrow slightly raised as he remained inquisitive.  
"If you want to, Remus," she smiled.

Her smile. It was tantilizing him - mocking him unintentionally. He was part bloody Werewolf - what was he playing at? He couldn't be having a relationship with someone as pretty and intelligent as Narcissa. There were so many things to think about that he had just shoved aside. One of them being his little affliction, or as James called it 'his little furry problem.' Another was the family Narcissa came from. Pure blood mania. Surely they wouldn't accept him - he was a Gryffindor, and a cursed one at that. Andromeda was going out with Ted Tonks, though, and she was from a Slytherin background. Maybe, _maybe_ they'd relent.  
"Sure," he answered, his face rather hot. What was he meant to do now - kiss her again? Take her hand and walk along with her in front of everybody? In front of Lucius and Snape? Narcissa did not appear to see him dithering, but Sirius and James did. "_Take her hand, Moony_," whispered James from the side of his mouth. Remus obeyed, taking her hand in his own. It was ice cold, whereas his own hand was suprisingly hot. He felt guilty. It was as if he was leading her on. Sirius and James truged ahead, forgetting about Wormtail lying in the snow without another thought.

The fact that Narcissa Black had kissed Remus Lupin and was now dating him seemed to spread across the school faster than a killing spell - everyone seemed to be either whispering about the matter, or watching her with interest. "Look," Narcissa said fiercely to a few whispering fourth years who were staring at her as she walked past them with Sirius, Remus and James, "Do you WANT me to hex you?" They scattered, terrified. Well, they _would _be terrified, considering her sister was a Death Eater, along with the rest of her cronies. Bellatrix was, as far as Narcissa was concerned, still seeing an awful lot of Voldemort - outside of meetings, yet she was _still_ going out with Rodolphus. Sirius pointed his wand threateningly at a third year who mentioned Narcissa, and he shrieked before scarpering.  
"Well, well," said a silky voice from behind them. "Looks like dear old Lucius will have to forget any chance he would have with you, Narcissa."  
"I - _what_?" Narcissa turned around, expecting to be looking at another gossiper, but she was only to be faced by Severus Snape. "Oh, hello Severus."  
"What do you want, _Snivellus?_" Sirius glared at Snape, whose smile unfolded calmly onto his face.   
"Calm yourself, Black," Snape replied coldly, his dark eyes boring into Sirius's, "Or I may have to report you for hexing innocent children."  
"Innocent when they're DISCUSSING me?" Narcissa said incredulously, her hands resting on her hips.  
Snape paused. "That is rude of them, yes," he began, "but innocent none the less." And with that, he turned away, looking rather smug with himself. His cloak swirled around him with it's extra long sleeves, making him look ludicriously bat like.  
"What's HIS problem?" James said spitefully, glaring at Snape's dissapearing back.  
Sirius shrugged.  
"People like him don't always need a reason, James." Pulling his wand out, Sirius examined it absent mindedly, before putting it back. Remus was smiling beningly, not letting the words people were speaking bother him more than necessary. "I'm going to the common room for a while," Narcissa told them, then directing her goodbye to Remus by kissing his cheek. Sirius and James pretended not to notice by having a coughing fit. Rolling her eyes, she waggled her fingers at Sirius and James before departing towards the Dungeons. 

After answering the password to a rather grumping looking portrait, she was permitted into the common room. Bellatrix was sitting on the emerald couch, ashen faced. Next to her was Lucius Malfoy, who had been heatedly discussing something with Bellatrix, but at Narcissa's arrival, his face smiled and the argument ceased. His eyes were lifeless. No emotion, apart from the wicked smile, was shown on his aging features. He looked tired. His usually pale skin had accquired a grey-ish tinge to it. His hair, ususally thick, was thinning around his head. Bellatrix spoke, eventually, breaking the awkward silence. "Andy has a fiance - that bloody mudblood!" Her voice came out several pitches higher than normal, her eyes brimming with instant hate and dislike to their younger sister.  
"What mudblood?" Narcissa pretended she didn't know Andromeda was dating the elusive Ted Tonks. She sat on the arm of the couch, her blonde hair curling neatly around her chest. Bellatrix snorted impatiently, tossing her dark hair. Her heavy-lidded eyelids seemed rather tired; they kept drooping. "Ted Tonks. I'm writing to mother about it - it's inacceptable."  
Narcissa was shocked. "No, Bella, don't. I'll speak to Andy - she has to tell mother herself. Give her one week or so to do it."  
Bellatrix looked at her suspicously. "Why so tense, Cissy?"  
"I'm not - it's just better if she does it herself." Narcissa replied quietly.  
Bellatrix snorted, and rolled her eyes. "Whatever," she pouted, "just make sure you talk to her. You better get going." She gestured to the portrait door pointedly. "Bye, Cissy - don't forget, you only have a week."  
"Yes, bye Cissy _dearest_." Lucius called to her, his voice like honey. It was more sickening, rather than sweet. Shuddering, Narcissa climbed out of the portrait, making her way back to the Gryffindor common room.


	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry about the short chapter, guys. :(**

_One week. _The words echoed through Narcissa's mind as she walked placidly towards the Gryffindor common room. She paused hestitantly at the portrait of the Fat Lady, debating whether or not she should enter. "_Flobberworms," _Narcissa told the portrait wearily. The Fat Lady nodded in agreeance, and the door swung open. Walking into the common room, she immediatley noticed her cousin looking rather distant. "Sirius?" she edged closer, taking a seat next to him on the couch.  
"He's ... dead," Sirius whispered, not tearing his gaze away from the flickering flames.  
Narcissa understood. She didn't have to speak words, to throw over-rated and over-used sympathay to her cousin. She pulled him close to her, and he rested her head on her, crying silently. "I - I," he hiccuped through his tears, "didn't even get on with him that well. It was always a competitive thing, you know, between Reg and I ..." he trailed off, sighing heavily through his tears.  
"I know, I know," Narcissa murmured sympathetically, kissing her cousin's head, her hands sliding around him as she hugged him. He continued to cry silently for quite some time, before eventually, falling asleep against Narcissa. Her own eyes were beginning to droop, and with that she fell into a dreamless sleep.

A few hours later, she awoke, Sirius still asleep next to her. Her head was resting on his. As her eyes adjusted to the lights and scene of the room, she saw a pair of blue eyes glance at her curiously, waiting for her to speak.  
"What's wrong with Padfoot?" Remus asked rather grumpily, his eyes lowering to the ruby carpet. James was sitting on the next armchair by Remus, his expression one of concern.  
"Regulus ... is ..." Narcissa couldn't finish her sentence. She lowered her gaze from James and Remus, a tear rolling down her face. She was just coming to terms with it herself. Her cousin - _dead. _  
"I'm so sorry, Narcissa." James said sincerely, a look of sympathay crossing his usually humoured expression.  
Remus wanted to wrap her in his arms and tell her it would be okay, but somehow he couldn't bring himself to do so. He looked at her intently before speaking. "Was it Voldemort?"  
"This ... this isn't the time, Remus." Narcissa's eyes were still lowered, not meeting his.  
"Then when will be?" He replied indignantly, leaning forward, pressing his fingertips together. "Narcissa - you have to find this out-"  
"And I will!" She said, close to tears again, "but not right _NOW_."  
Sirius stirred.  
James shot a look at Remus that was confusement mixed with surprise.  
Sirius yawned slightly, sitting up, rubbing his tear-stained face with aggrivation. He was rather suprised to see James and Lupin watching him curiously, and his hand leaped to his hair as he smoothed it out. "Hey Moony, Prongs ..." he trailed off, his hand lowering to rest on his knee, his eyes bloodshot. Sirius never cried ordinarily - he was pretty tough within the group. "Mate, I guess it'd be rather inconsiderate asking if you were alright or not." James smiled.  
Sirius laughed, before speaking hoarsely. "Regulus - he -"  
"I know, Sirius," Remus said quietly, his eyes over come with remorse for his friend.  
Narcissa paused. "I need to ... I need ... to check on Bellatrix."  
"Sure," Sirius replied, looking at her. "Thanks, Cissa." He kissed her cheek before she got up, and she kissed his forehead. Remus looked away pointedly as Narcissa went to bid her farewell to him, and overcome with confusement, she murmured goodbye and fled from the common room. 

Emotions were running high and her mind was all over the place. _Regulus was dead, Regulus was dead.  
_She was running now, her blonde hair becoming messy but for now she did not care; the only thing that mattered was finding her old friends. Entering the common room, she looked around wildly.  
Bellatrix was sitting on the couch, no emotion displayed whatsoever.  
"Did ... did you hear?" Whispered Narcissa, tears spilling down her cheeks, her hands clenched.  
Bellatrix considered her sister for sometime before replying. "Yes." Her tone was so cold - so uncaring.  
"And you're not even bothered?" Narcissa exploded angrily, advancing towards her sister.  
"He betrayed the Dark Lord," replied Bellatrix, and for the first time, a flicker of anger crossed her face. She let her arms unfold, resting one on the arm of the couch, staring up curiously at her sister.   
Narcissa was shaking her head in disbelief. "_What?"_  
"He-betrayed-the-dark-lord." repeated Bellatrix, rolling her eyes. "He wanted to back out. Became too scared. Wouldn't attend meetings anymore. So, he got killed."  
Narcissa went white. "And you don't even care? Your own cousin, Bella!"  
Bellatrix's lip curled. "He is a traitor. I doubt you will find anyone else to be sympathetic towards his behaviour. If he were so scared of the Dark Lord, then he should not of signed up."  
"Perhaps he felt like he had to," Narcissa whispered.  
"Whatever," replied Bellatrix, examining her nails with evident interest.  
Narcissa smiled. "So - if you stop having sexual liasons with him - will you be dead too?"  
Bellatrix shot up faster than lightning. "What did you say?"  
Narcissa didn't answer, she merely smiled and walked away, out of the common room. But once outside, she sat down against the dungeon wall, and let the tears flow.


	11. Chapter 11

**Some of this chapter may be inappropiate to under fifteens.**

Weeks passed. Narcissa had long lost Andromeda to Ted - and that resulted in her little sister being called foul names by her family and so called friends. Once their Aunt had learnt the news, she was furious, shrieking profanties. This resulted Andromeda being blasted off their aunt's portrait. Bellatrix and Lucius seemed to be more distant than ever from Narcissa - along with Rodolphus, Crabbe and Goyle. The only one who remained talking to Narcissa, however, was Severus Snape. Late at night, they would talk into the early hours of the morning about their problems, and their opinions on matters. Narcissa's grades were beginning to suffer - she went from Outstanding to Exceeds Expectations and "Acceptable." Although they were still relatively good, they still felt like an underachievement to Narcissa. Coping with Regulus's death, schoolwork, and excruciating problems with Remus had taken it's toll on her. Often, after lunch, she would just sit with James, Sirius, Remus and Peter by the lake, watching the wildlife and talking, quietly. Sometimes, it would just be her and Remus, and they would lie against a tree, holding hands without speech, merely enjoying one anothers company.

Another thing that was stressing Narcissa out was the fact she kept getting countless letters from her parents, reminding her of her purity towards wizards 'lower class' than herself, and to maintain that position, otherwise consequences would be severe. She did not have to guess who had spoken uncharacteristically to her parents - it was clearly Bellatrix seeking revenge. As far as Narcissa was concerned, Bellatrix was due to marry Rodolphus around mid August, despite still 'carrying on' with Voldemort. Narcissa had little respect for him - if any at all. After all, he murdered Regulus - didn't he?  
Of course he did. There was no doubting the lengths of trouble Voldemort would go to just to murder someone. Sometimes, all he had to do was point his wand at them and say the two words, and Merlin was your uncle. Or, he went to extreme measures to capture somebody, torture them, and so on. Possibilities swam through Narcissa's mind, and although James had suggested she should not dwell on it, shoving this half explained death out of her mind wasn't possible. Not right now, anyway. Sirius understood what she was going through more than anybody else. Sometimes, all she had to do was _look_ sad, and he would hold her, without words, merely comforting her. Remus didn't seem to like it one bit, but he never said anything. It was only his best friend and girlfriend after all - plus they were cousins, and if they did anything it'd be plain wrong. So, putting his worries aside, he would slip his hand through hers, and watch as her eyes lit up. Sometimes they went for walks after dinner, just him and her, holding hands and kissing.

One one paticular occasion, they were sitting by the lake after dinner, just watching the crystal clear water. The moon did not appear that night, much to their delight. Remus smiled at Narcissa. "I'm sorry that I've been a bit edgy recently." he told her apologetically, his eyes gazing at the horizon. Her hand tightened around his in appriceation towards his apology.  
"I'm sorry too. It's just ... with Regulus d-dying ..." her eyes filled with tears, and Remus looked slightly taken aback. He stood up, as if agitated by her crying. She stood up too and grabbed his arm. "I'm sorry ..." she trailed off as he pulled her close to him and pressed his lips against hers for a passionate kiss. She was suprised, but indistinctively her hands slid around his neck, his hips brushing against hers. "Oh, Remus," she gasped as he drew for breath before planting kisses along her neck, his hands holding her close to him. Her hair brushed against his cheek delicatley. His hands reached for her robes and he disregarded it, continuing to kiss on her face, lips and neck. She wrapped her arms around his middle, eventually resting her head over his shoulder. "I love you." She whispered.  
"I love you too." He whispered back, his hands stroking her hair softly. And with that said and done, he held her close to him, his head resting against hers, as they both watched the lake in front of them calming, a slight breeze lowering it's speed as they stood embraced.

"Narcissa Black!"  
"What?" groaned Narcissa groggily. She looked up at Dumbledore's face curiously. Oh, fiddlesticks. She'd fallen asleep in Defence Against the Dark Arts. Dumbledore did not tell her off or punish her with detention, he merely said with a smile, "Make sure you get enough sleep, Miss Black - perhaps you should cut the amount of time you spend outside after dinner." He winked at her pleasantly, walking back to the front of the class to resume the topic he had been discussing.  
"So - the last unforgiveable curse is ..." As Dumbledore began to describe the killing curse, Narcissa switched off, thinking about last night with Remus down by the lake. It had been so _romantic_. They had lain and watched the stars, cuddled up together. She glanced at Remus to see him grinning at her. Sirius wasn't paying attention to Dumbledore either - he was staring blankly out of the window. As soon as the lesson had ended, she walked over to Sirius's desk, which he was sharing with a sleepy looking James. "Sirius?"  
"Uh huh," he glanced tiredly at her, watching her look suprised at the dark circles he had under his eyes, the fact his hair was messy - and he wasn't as lively anymore.  
"Padfoot," Wormtail scuttled over, looking flushed. "It's only Regulus, and he was a bas-"  
Sirius drew his wand so quick that no one else had time to react. "You don't _ever_," he grabbed Wormtail's robes, "_badmouth my family AGAIN!"_  
"Padfoot - let GO!" Remus was looking worried, approaching the two as if hoping his presence would end any possible battle taking place. Wormtail was drenched in a cold sweat, his teeth chattering.  
"Fine," snapped Sirius, letting go of Wormtail. "You're pathetic," he told him, his face contorted with a mixture of misery and anger. With that, he picked up his school bag, and headed out of the classroom.  
"I'll go after him," said Narcissa, her expression worried. Remus nodded vacantly at her speech, as he checked Wormtail was alright. James had appeared to of missed the whole scene, yawning loudly and ruffling his hair. Smirking slightly, she left in a flourish, her flat heeled shoes tapping away as she desended. It did not take long to find Sirius; he was standing by the Great Hall, his arms crossed. As she approached, he sighed. "Wormy," he begun, "is right in a way. Regulus was a bloody smug bastard - but it seems he saw the light, if you will - and tried to leave. But ... he didn't deserve to die. It's-"  
"Not fair," finished Narcissa quietly, "I know."  
"Wormtail doesn't understand-"  
"I'm sure he tries to. Look - we're all here for you, even though Remus may be vacant for a while when full moon is about, James playing Quidditch being ultimatley DETERMINED to flatter Slytherin. Wormy cares too - he's just a bit naive. And I care, O.K?"  
Sirius smiled. "Dear cousin - what would I do without you?" He kissed her cheek in thanks.  
Narcissa smiled back. "Come on, _Padfoot_, we've got Potions next . . ." she pulled a face. He laughed at her obvious discomfort pleasantly.  
"Better get going then, _Cissy._"  
She laughed and took his arm, making their way to the Dungeons.

Bellatrix smirked, watching her cousin and sister from the staircase. Oh, this was getting _far_ too interesting.


	12. Chapter 12

It was lunchtime now, and after finishing their food hurriedly, the five set off to sit by the lake. Sirius had cheered up considerably, thanks to Narcissa, and was soon back to hexing people with James for no real reason. He had forgiven Wormtail, who was so suprised at being forgiven, actually flung his arms around Sirius as he hugged him. "Get off me!" said Sirius coldly, disregarding Wormtail until he was nothing but a heap on the ground; "I have forgiven, certainly, but I have not forgotten."

As they sat by the lake, Sirius and James discussed broomstick tactics, whilst Wormtail attempted to read a book with extreme difficulty, whilst Remus and Narcissa sat quite still, breathing in the warm air and appriceating the hot sun on their faces. Narcissa had her eyes closed, but a moment or so later something was blocking out the sun. Opening her eyes, she saw Bellatrix infront of her, looking wild. She ignored the four boys, and spoke directly to her sister. "Cissy - I'm leaving, tonight."  
"Why?" responded Narcissa casually, edging up on her elbows to look at her sister better. She squinted through the dazzling sunshine.  
"Because," replied Bellatrix somewhat impatiently, "The Dark Lord requires assistance-"  
James snorted.  
"Think he's _beneath you,_ Potter?" said Bellatrix coldly, "I'd watch out if I were you - he is beginning to bare a grudge against you, to be sincerely honest."  
"Is that a threat?" snapped James, standing up now. His right hand went in his robes and he retrieved his wand so quickly, Narcissa barely had time to blink. Bellatrix glanced at James's defiant expression, and merely laughed. "Why, yes it is."

And with that she turned away, a smug expression on her face. Narcissa went white, and felt clammy, despite the hot day. Suddenly, nothing mattered. How stupid could her sister be? She could end up getting killed, just like Regulus - decieving Voldemort or not. Why was Bellatrix making herself so vunerable? Without warning, tears of indignation begun to well up in her eyes. "She - she can't!"  
"Narcissa," said James quietly, "but she can, and is. She doesn't care about your feelings - she just wanted to hurt you emotionally. Does she usually tell you when she's off to kill somebody? No. She doesn't. She's playing mind games - or something of the sort, anyway."

Narcissa shuddered. "I don't want to loose another family member ..." she trailed off, and rested her head on Remus, sighing heavily. Her blue eyes always seemed to be seeping tears nowadays; but nothing could really cure her. "This," she murmured, "is unfinished business - between Bellatrix and I."

Sirius looked inquisitively at her, his head resting against his hands. "Explain."

"I can't, dear cousin," she murmured, not meeting his intense gaze, "as I'm only partially sure she is seeking revenge."  
"Revenge?" scoffed James, "for what?"  
"Just something I said about Voldemort." said Narcissa calmly. At his name, Wormtail gave a violent twitch, his teeth chattering. "Problem, Wormtail?" she asked, an eyebrow raised.

"No, Miss C-Cissy." He stuttered, his hands clasped together.  
"Don't call me that; Kreacher does and it annoys me so; yet still he does it. . ." she trailed off as Sirius interrupted her.  
"Kreacher was very close to Regulus. I wonder how he has taken the news ..."  
"I guess," said James, picking up a rock and throwing it at the lake with impressive force, "he has been forced to shed his grief in solitude, rather than in front of his mistress."  
Sirius nodded. "You're probably right, James."

Remus nodded in agreement, looked very tired. His hair, usually dark and vibrant, was looking slightly downcast. His blue eyes that were usually cutting edge had lost their gleam. But, it was _that_ time of the month, so the transformations he had to go through must take it out of him. He ran his fingers through her hair without speaking, something that usually comforted her when she was at her worst. But what she _really_ missed was his lively topics of discussion and enthuasiam, the jubliant expression he would have on his face when he talked to her. That was gone. She tried to understand what he was going through, but something about the matter was eating away at her. "Remus," said Narcissa softly, "are you alright?"  
Remus shuddered. "I'm fine, thank you." he said pointedly.  
Narcissa glanced at Sirius, who shrugged. "Don't look so down, _Cissy,_" he said, doing an excellent impersonation of Lucius Malfoy, "Us Purebloods are have so much more _potential_ than the lower class wizards of our modern day establishment."

Laughing, Narcissa got into role. "Go _away_, Lucius, nobody cares apart from you."  
Sirius leant closer to her. "Cissy, dearest," he purred, "I think you'll find they do."

"That's _enough._" snapped Remus uncharacteristically. Sirius shot him an apologetic look.  
"Sorry, Moony ... I was just kidding around. Everything is so tense lately - I just thought a bit of laughter in the air might, you know." He ran his hands through his messy hair in agitation, surveying Remus, who sighed.  
"That's quite alright Padfoot," he said in a dignified tone, before settling against the tree again, closing his eyes. Narcissa was confused. What was wrong with Remus? She wasn't even doing _anything_ with her cousin - that would just be wrong, in more ways than one. So what, they had a laugh together - was that really such a crime?

Evidently so.  
They had no more lessons for that day, so they had planned for another trip into Hogsmede. As they began to leave the school grounds, they passed Lucius, and Sirius did yet another magnificent impersonation of him, the hair flick, his chest pushed out, strutting along as if he was superior. Narcissa almost cried with laughter with James and Wormtail, but Remus did not look paticularly amused. He kept glancing at his wristwatch edgily, eyebrow raised as the minutes ticked away faster and faster. Lucius raised his wand at them all, but his eyes rested on Narcissa.  
"Narcissa, dearest," he purred, and Narcissa was uncannily reminded of Sirius's earlier impression. She tried her hardest to keep a straight face.  
"Yes, _darling?_  
Lucius looked delighted; evidently missing the sarcastic tones in her voice.  
"I knew you were too good for him," he pointed at Remus with his wand, "I knew you'd come to me in the end."  
"You _wish,_" retorted Narcissa crisply, slipping her hand through Remus's. Lucius's face fell in a strange sort of way, before turning away and marching off without another word. Remus looked glum. "I've got to get going, soon."  
"Aw, Moony," James wheedled, "come for a butterbeer. Just one."  
"Just one?"  
"Yes."   
Remus sighed again. "Okay, okay."  
So, off they went. Their Butterbeers had been bought and consumed quickly; so Remus ended up having more than "just one." He looked slightly tipsy, intoxxicated from the sweetness of the warm drink. He had to go after a few hours; he had to meet Dumbledore for the potion and to keep away from the others until the next morning. He seemed sorry for treating Narcissa with little respect, so he pulled her close to him and embraced her tenderly, before bidding farewell.


	13. Chapter 13

The next day was Saturday, so Narcissa _had _intentionally planned to lie in - but any hope of that was long gone now. Somebody arrived back to the dorms rather noisily, slamming their things around in agitation. It was only when Narcissa had adjusted to the real world once more, she saw who it was. Bellatrix looked wretched, her dark hair falling miserably around her shoulders, her eyes bloodshot and watery. Her pale complexion appeared to be more gaunt than usual, and tears rolled down her cheeks. "Bella?" murmured Narcissa, pushing the covers back from her. Her sister looked at her, as if considering her for some time, before speaking in a distinct manner. "I - I nearly messed up, Cissy," said Bellatrix, sitting next to Narcissa on the bed. "I almost killed Lucius,"  
Narcissa gasped.  
"Instead of the required target ... The Dark Lord was furious with me ... he threatened to kill me unless I made it up to him. I have to kill somebody - an old family friend infact, tonight. I cannot say who, but what I can say is I ... I feel empty. Unwhole."  
"Oh, Bella," said Narcissa, "What have you got yourself into?"  
"And after it's done, you and I are required to go home Sunday night."  
"Um - _why?"_

_"_Mother was not too specific," replied Bellatrix, running her hands through her hair. "I need to go ... sort myself out."  
Narcissa stood up, and headed to the showers, suddenly in need of good, warm water to wake her up properly for the day ahead. After that was done, she put on some clothes, brushed her blonde hair, and headed out of the Slytherin quarters. She had agreed to meet Sirius and the others at breakfast, so she quickened her pace. She walked through the open doors leading to the great hall, and spotted them, already halfway through their meal. The great hall was mainly empty; only a few students were eating. Sirius grinned at her as she aopproached. "_Cissy, dearest,_" he gestured to the seat next to him, "you are rather late this morning."

"I didn't know breakfast was scheduled," replied Narcissa grumpily, sitting down next to him without considering Remus. She grabbed some toast and began to pile it on her plate. Sirius watched in amusement, flicking his dark hair out of his eyes, and watching some pretty Gryffindor girls with curiousity. Narcissa coughed pointedly, and he turned back to look at her. "Just kidding," said he, "I've only got eyes for you, dear cousin."  
Narcissa wondered whether he was joking or not, so she just smiled. Remus knocked over the salt accidently, and threw it over his right shoulder. And, who did it consequently hit in the eye?  
Severus Snape.  
"OW! WHAT THE-?" shouted Snape loudly, his hands covering his eyes as he shrank away. He looked demented in his pain - and he pulled his wand out and aimed it at Remus with half an eye open, "_CRUCI-"_  
"_Petrificius __Totalus_!" yelled Narcissa, hitting Snape full blast. He became immobilised; and crashed to the ground, now completely still. Remus looked disgusted, even angry.  
"What did you do that for?" Remus shouted at her, picking up his bag and running out of the great hall.  
"YOU IDIOT, REMUS LUPIN!" She yelled after him, "HE WAS GOING TO USE AN UNFORGIVEABLE CURSE ON YOU!"

Dumbledore entered the great hall unexpectedly, silencing them all. Narcissa lowered her wand.  
"And does what owe the greatest pleasure for all this shouting?" He asked pleasantly, selecting a piece of Narcissa's toast, surveying her above his half-moon glasses.  
Narcissa could not even answer him; she was trembling with anger. Dumbledore followed her gaze to Snape, and sighed.  
"_Finite Incantatem_." he murmured, his hand stroking his beard as if dwelling on something. "Severus Snape," he spoke with a dignified authority, his blue eyes flashing. "Am I to believe you attempted to use the Cruciatus curse upon that of Remus Lupin?"  
"I- Yes." Snape drew himself to his feet, shuddering slightly.  
"And that is an unforgiveable curse, is it not?"  
"Yes, but-"  
"Severus, I would appriceate it if you would drop by my office around seven this evening?"  
Snape went white. "I can't, I'm going somewere - already scheduled, headmaster ..."  
"Then unschedule it," replied Dumbledore simply, turning to leave the great hall, his cloak swirling.  
Snape looked furious, and sat down at the Slytherin table; his salted eyes forgotten. Narcissa swallowed. What had just happened? Why did Remus storm off? Why, why, why? James and Peter had got up and gone after him, their strides quick and efficent. Sirius noted with some resentment the entire great hall had began to fill up now; he shot them all indignant looks, and put his hand around her waist, and she put her arm around his neck, and together they both walked out, leaving a trail of curiousity behind them.  
If only Narcissa, Sirius and Remus knew what was coming next.


	14. Chapter 14

James and Wormtail had managed to calm Remus down; but he was still angered by Narcissa. Angered so much that he began to blank her out of his mind; refusing to correspond with her. This charade of his had only gone on for a couple of hours, but Narcissa had had enough. There was no need whatsoever for him to act like this; she had been _defending_ him. Did he actually want to be inflicted with the Cruciatus curse? No, no. It was just so _unlike_ him to be acting like this. Usually, he and her together were divine. Granted, there were a few wobbly moments, but otherwise it had been ultimate perfection. But now ...  
After going to Charms to collect some work, he left quickly, scuttling out of the classroom. Narcissa followed him, determined to get to the bottom of all of this. She grabbed his arm and stopped him. "What is up with you?"  
He studied her, his face falling into lines of misery, looking much older than his seventeen years. "You shouldn't of retaliated towards Severus," he said quietly, his eyes not meeting hers.   
"Why not? Remus - he was going to _hurt _you. Do you honestly think I was going to stand there and let him do it?" Her eyes began to glitter with tears.  
He did not reply.  
"And what makes it worse is," she continued, her hand resting against the wall, "you were just going to let him torture you."  
His eyes glistened.  
"Don't you ... don't you care?"  
"This isn't the time to talk about it," he whispered, his blue eyes now staring intently into her own.  
"Remus, you can talk to me, you know." She stepped closer to him, in hoping to reassure him, but this only made things worse. He grabbed his hair with both hands and pulled it; looking slightly deranged.  
"He could of let everyone know about my condition!"  
"People know anyway-"  
"And by people you mean the staff and our friends."  
"Well, yeah-"

"Point prooven then!" He cried, his hands clapping together as if applauding himself. "Don't you understand, Narcissa? This is going to ruin any chance I have at getting a good job if word gets out; it wouldn't matter if I got O's in everything either - I am still afflicted and that is THAT." He ended his lecture on a harsh tone, but his face then relaxed, as if it was out of his system.  
"I will _always_ love you; whether you're afflicted or not, Remus."  
"That's very kind of you to say so Narcissa, but ..." he trailed off as she dived at him, wrapping her arms around him and hugging him fiercely.  
"Stop talking like that! You know I love you."  
"And I love you, but-"  
"Gosh," yawned Sirius, approaching, three buttons on his shirt undone, "it's bloody hot." Narcissa let go of Remus, but he took her hand and held it instead. Narcissa blushed, but it was not because of Remus.  
"Your shirt ..." she indicated his shirt, trailing off. "Could it be any more loose?"  
He smirked. "Is that a request?"  
"I - no!" replied Narcissa indignantly, her cheeks tinting. He ignored her and unbuttoned the rest of his shirt completely. A few younger girls who were walking past looked suprised at his fine fisque. They weren't the only ones.  
"You - work - out?" said Narcissa weakly. Remus frowned at her.  
"No," he replied, yawning, and pulled her away from Remus. "Feel free to check, though."  
She swallowed. "No thanks."  
He caught her hand as she went to turn away, pulling her closer. He placed her hand on his stomach. His hands were suprisingly soft along with his skin; delicate, even.  
"I see ..." she murmured, pulling away after a moment or so. Remus continued to frown at nobody in paticular; but his frown subsided when James and Wormtail re-appeared. "So, what do you all want to do today?"  
"Be lazy," sighed Sirius, "let's got to the lake. I fancy sleeping there. I would of suggested a trip to Hogsmede, but I really can't be bothered. Catching up on Charm work," he rolled his eyes at this, "is SO not an option, either."

So, off they all went to sit by the lake. Narcissa had decided to take off her shoes and dip them into the crystal clear water. As she did this, she contemplated about Sirius. He was very striking, yes. Intelligent, yes. James Potter's, Wormtail's, and Remus's best friend, yes. Christ. What was she doing thinking about her cousin? As she was lost in thought, she did not notice James creep up behind her, about to shove her into the lake in a playful manner. "Oi!" shouted Sirius, bringing Narcissa back to her thoughts. She turned a fraction; but James pushed her into the cold lake. She spluttered and coughed and laughed all at the same time, dragging herself up out of the lake. She pointed her wand at James, but Sirius coughed slightly. He pointed his wand at her, and quicker than a blinking eye, her sopping wet clothes were now dry and warm. "Thanks, Sirius."  
He winked at her. "No problem, dear cousin."  
She smiled back at him, and went to join Remus, who had been apparently oblivious to her falling in the lake, thanks to James. He was intently reading one of the books she had given him, a frown creasing in between his eyebrows as he concentrated. She sighed. Sirius sat on the other side of her, which meant she now had Remus on her left, and Sirius on her right. His shirt was still undone. He wriggled to get comfortable and elbowed her in her side. His hair flopped over his face as he closed his eyes, intending clearly to fall asleep under the sun. She sighed heavily, also feeling pretty sleepy as the sun blared down. She attempted to rest her head on Remus but he pushed her away gently. "I'm reading," he said kindly, not removing his eyes from his book. "Sleep on Sirius, or something."  
She could not help but to notice the sarcastic indifference in his tone, but let it slide. Fine. She would. She rested her head on Sirius's chest, and with that, fell asleep ...


	15. Chapter 15

"Wake up! Narcissa ... wake up."  
She did not move.  
"Narcissa, I know you're awake."  
Someone was breathing on her face, with a soft, mint-like aroma. A faint smile crossed her face but he appeared not to of noticed. His hands ran around her waist and he began to tickle her. She shot up violently, her hands indistinctively reaching for around his neck, her blonde hair brushing against his cheek. Her eyes adjusted, and she saw the grinning face of her cousin. Remus had not noticed, apparently. He was busy taking notes from his book. She removed her hands quickly from around Sirius.  
"Well, thanks for waking me up, _Padfoot._"   
"You are quite welcome, dear _Cissy._"  
"I see you've decided to button up your shirt?" Narcissa leant back against the tree, brushing her blonde hair off her face. Sirius grinned at her, flicking his dark hair out of his sparkling blue eyes. She couldn't help but to smile back at him.  
"Yeah," he paused to casually flick his wand at Wormtail, who shot several yards away from them. "Whoops." he said sarcastically with a ghost of a smile. Narcissa giggled, looking at Wormtail who had landed somewhat uncomfortably on his backside. James was playing with the stolen Snitch; catching it with evident talent. Remus glanced up after a moment or so, and looked at Narcissa. "I see you've woken up." his smile was somewhat strained.  
Narcissa returned a vibrant smile, and sat next to him, glancing at his notes. "Why are you noting the strategies in this book, Remus?"  
He blushed at her being so close, although he was used to it. "Just for the future."  
James snorted. "What's gonna happen in the future; we're all gonna die by Voldemort and/or the death eaters?" he shook his head. "Call me selfish Remus, but I think you're a bit over the top with that statement."  
Remus sighed, but didn't bother to consult his friends anymore with possibilities of the future. "We better go back to the castle."  
"I can't be bothered getting up," said Sirius.

"Me neither." sighed Narcissa, nestling against the tree and watching the lake. Remus glared, much to her suprise. "Stay, Remus - it's a nice evening ..."  
"No." he picked up his things and shoved them in his bag with such force, she thought it may rip. He dropped his bag with a heavy thud, then beckoned to Narcissa to come with him. "Come here ..." she stood, rather relucantly, and he took her hand and walked off with her around the lake. "You do like me, don't you?" he asked, pausing by some trees as they gazed over at their friends. James was now throwing Wormtail into the lake. She smiled at what James was doing, then turned to Remus.  
"I love you, and you should always remember that."  
A doubtful expression flickered across his face for a nano-second. He stepped closer to her; their noses briefly touching. "I've never really had a girlfriend before," he told her, his hand stroking her face gently. "So, I was wondering ... do you really want to go out with me?"  
"Yes-"  
"_Think_ about it Narcissa. If you really do ... then kiss me like you never have before." His eyes seemed to mock her unspoken opinion, his hair falling over his eyes. She smiled, stroking his face. She stepped closer, their bodies now touching. Her hands wrapped around him, and she leant in to kiss. It was simply electric; it was as if little sparks were shooting out of their mouths and into the air around them. Birds fluttered above them and the only sound was over their mouths locking together, and the sound of the calm lake's miniature waves. Her lips pressed gently yet longingly against his; he responded as delicatley. His hands traced down her back, coming to rest around her waist. The kiss ended; they remained close. "I want you to answer me one thing, Narcissa," he murmured, inhaling her light fragrance as he ran his hands through her hair.  
"Anything," she replied, leaning close for another kiss.  
He paused. Dare he ruin a special moment?  
Yes.

"Do you ... fancy-your-cousin?"  
"Sorry - I didn't quite get that ..."  
"I said," Remus swallowed his anger, "do you like your cousin?"  
"Sure, Sirius is awesome."  
"No, Narcissa."  
She looked at him enquiringly.  
"I mean _like, like._"

"Oh god, no! That'd be sick!" her eyes bored into his.  
"Really." He tilted his head to one side, a disbelieving stance in his manner. "Then why do you flirt with him so much?"  
"I don't!"  
"Yes, you do. Unintentionally, perhaps," he let go of her, "but you do so."  
"Any examples of my alleged flirtations?" she was beginning to get angry now.  
He nodded, as if bored already. "One, you slept on him."  
"If I recall," said Narcissa heatedly, "you TOLD me to."  
He shook his head, as if trying to emphasise that the sarcasam in the words he said should of been noticed. "Secondly, you're always holding him close to you and kissing him-"  
Narcissa pushed him, hard. "You complete IDIOT, Remus Lupin! Has it not occured to you that my cousin, his brother, has just died? HE WAS GRIEVING. I WAS COMFORTING HIM - IS THAT SO HARD TO COMPHREND?"  
"Narcissa, please don't raise your voice-"  
She began to pace up and down, hands on hips, wearing an indignant expression. "Yes, I think she's handsome," she said, speaking his unasked question, "And yes, I do like him. I love him, actually."  
Remus glowered.  
"As a FAMILY member. Dear god Remus, use your common sense."  
"Maybe I am," he shot back at her, walking away. "Maybe I _am."_


	16. Chapter 16

Narcissa Black was sitting alone on that crisp evening. She watched the leaves fall from the Oak tree above her with mild interest, the only sounds that could be heard was her breathing, and the lapping of gentle water from the lake. Pulling up her sleeve, she inspected her arm. Flawless skin. No brand, no mark, nothing. It was a small piece of dignity that kept her going; she would not work for Voldemort no matter what. Never would she lower her standards to become a death eater. More and more people were dying, and it was tearing her up inside. After her argument with Remus earlier on, she had kept her distance from the marauders, even though James, Sirius and Peter had no problem with her, she deemed it sensible not to intrude. A constant war was going on in her head. Half of her wanted to kiss him and forgive him, assuring him there was nothing between Sirius and herself. And although in most perspective that was true, a small part of her spoke against this.

_You'd be lying to yourself, Narcissa._ Something in her brain was speaking to her, surveying her with curiousity. _Did you ever even love Remus, Narcissa? No, you did not. You only wanted him to get closer to Sirius..._ The voice was cold and intruding; her mind flickered with images that were not hers. _Why not be honest towards Remus - you don't even love him._

_**Yes, I do love Remus.**_

_Such lies Narcissa, such LIES ...  
__**Leave me alone!**__  
Lies... Lies... Lies..._

  
Tears ran down her face, and a triumphant laugh in her mind told her, whoever it was, had succeeded in torturing her. Whoever it was left abruptly. Closing her eyes, she tried to sleep, tried to block anything and everything out ...

She must of dozed off for a while, because when her eyes opened she was faced by a misty air, the night sky now dark. It was not full moon, but that was hardly any reassurance. A wet, cold nose pushed against cheek. She started, only to see a big, black dog sitting next to her, it's head to one side, watching her. She blinked; and saw it was now Sirius sitting next to her.  
"I forgot you were an Animagus," she said quietly, pushing her blonde hair back of her face.  
He smiled. "Where've you been? You dissapeared, dear cousin."  
"Argument with-"  
"Ah, that explains things then." He leant back against the tree, his hair flopping over his face. He was so ... handsome. Carelessly handsome. "He's been pretty depressed ever since you both walked off together. What happened; if you don't mind me asking? James tried to ask but Moony got pretty angry with him and went off to the Library. Wormy tried too, but Moony actually pointed his wand at him and threatened him to keep away. I decided not to ask - what would of been the point?" He paused, watching her rub her tearstained face with her hand. "Did he make you cry, Narcissa?" His tone changed.  
She nodded, then shook her head. He looked imploringly at her, as if urging her to speak. "Yes _and _noSomething, or someone, entered my mind, told me things, manipulated my thoughts and loaded images into my mind that were _so_ horrible. They looked futuristic, nothing similiar to what we're used to now. Sirius, Remus thinks..."  
Narcissa paused. Should she ruin a friendship with Sirius, and a relationship with Remus?

Sirius saw her hestitate, and he placed a hand on hers. "This isn't going to change anything between us all, dear cousin." As his hand covered hers she instantly felt warmer, inside and out. "He thinks ... he thinks ... I love you."  
For a moment, his expression did not change, and she feared the worst. But then his face broke out into a smile. "Well - I love you, Narcissa."  
"Sirius - he means_ love love_."  
"I know."  
"What? Did you hear me-"  
Sirius sighed. "Narcissa, I have been blessed with magnificent hearing, but in answer to your question, yes, I did hear you, and yes, I do love you."  
She was silenced. Her attention was half-caught by the murmur of the lake and the sound of the low wind swirling around them. He leant forward to kiss her, and the moment she kissed him she regretted it, but he was so warm, tender, loving ... his lips brushed against hers for more when-

"NARCISSAAAA! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!"

Sirius was shaking her. He had somehow intruded hospitality by enterting the Slytherin common room, were Narcissa was on the couch, asleep. "Whaa- oh!" she blushed, realising it had all been a dream, just a terrible, misleading dream.  
"It's Quidditch, you doze! Slytherin VS Gryffindor; and WE will obviously win." He pulled her up smugly. "I think you'd better talk to Remus, though ..." she saw he was in Quidditch outfit; his red cape flowing gently. "You don't-"  
"Play Quidditch? Heh - I'm Keeper for this match. Should be fun. Well - what are you waiting for - lets go!"  
She stood, yawning, catching her reflection in the mirror by the bookcase. She looked rather tired, her blonde hair slightly messy. Sirius had left, and was waiting outside the portrait, when the words from last night happened again.

_You'd be lying to yourself, Narcissa._ Something in her brain was speaking to her, surveying her with curiousity. _Did you ever even love Remus, Narcissa? No, you did not. You only wanted him to get closer to Sirius..._ The voice was cold and intruding; her mind flickered with images that were not hers. _Why not be honest towards Remus - you don't even love him._

_**Yes, I do love Remus.**_

_Such lies Narcissa, such LIES ...  
__**Leave me alone!**__  
Lies... Lies... Lies..._

She shook her head, and brushing herself down, went to join Sirius.


	17. Chapter 17

"Let the game begin!" shouted McGonagall, and with that the Snitch was released. Narcissa stood, slightly wearily, next to Remus and Peter, all three of them supporting Gryffindor without hesitation. "_Excellent_ save from Sirius Black," praised McGonagall enthuastically, as Sirius deflected the Quaffle quickly. James was hovering around for some moment, in mid-animation, as he noticed the Snitch rather quickly. And with that, he zoomed off upwards into the sky, chasing the snitch. Lucius Malfoy, who was playing Seeker for Slytherin, shot after him, his emerald robes waving in contrast to James's ruby robes. Sirius continued to deflect any scores from entering the hoops, when it happened.  
"RIGHT," Rodolphus shouted, and hit the Quaffle towards Sirius. It knocked his broom slightly, but he did not loose his balance. Daringly, he zoomed a foot away from the hoops, riding his broomstick with no hands. "That the best you can do, Roddy?" he shouterd mockingly into the wind, returning to guard the hoops. Rodolphus looked furious, but could do nothing else now, as McGonagall had her beady eye fixed upon him.  
James was entering the clouds now, the Snitch almost dissapearing from view, when-  
"GRYFFINDOR WIN!"  
"That was a short match," muttered Wormtail in confusement, waving a Gryffindor banner. Remus sighed at the stupidity of his friend, but wore a smile as he watched James nosedive to the ground, holding the snitch like a trophy. Lucius Malfoy followed, wearing a sour expression. Sirius Black dived down from the hoops and high fived James in triumph. "Nice one James!"  
"Remus-" Narcissa begun, but he was already kissing her.  
"We won! We won!" he said as he drew for breath. He then seemed to remember who she was, and the uncertainy of their so called relationship. He smiled nervously at her, and gingerly placed a hand around her waist. "All forgiven?" she murmured against his ear.  
"Quite," replied he.

James and Sirius were whooping with joy, flying around the stadium showing off that they had won. A couple of girls squealed as Sirius nose dived so violently it looked like he was going to come off his broom - but he steadied himself perfectly and flew over to were his cousin and best friends were standing. "Did you SEE that catch James made?" he drew for breath; his face exhilarated. His dark hair flopped over his face, as he grinned at them, hovering in mid air. Narcissa grinned.  
"Awesome game, Sirius." she told him proudly, her blonde hair flickering in the light wind.  
Remus nodded in agreeance, his face set in a wide smile. "Good job, Padfoot - and Prongs," he added as James flew down to join Sirius, rather arrogantly, as he threw his head back as he laughed proudly. "Lily - come on-"  
He positioned the broom next to were Lily was standing, and she climbed, rather uncertainly, onto the back. "Hold on tight," he told Lily, before zooming off. Lily was squealing.  
"You want to ...?" Sirius trailed off as he pointed to his broomstick, looking at Narcissa. She looked at Remus, as if asking for position. He was grinning, and nodded. "Go on." She kissed his forehead, and without further ado, climbed on back of Sirius's broomstick, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Gooooo!" she cried, and with that he zoomed off after James. They circled the skies for some time, the four of them, having so much fun. Narcissa also had the perfect excuse to wrap her arms around her cousin tightly, not only because she was in fear of falling off, but for the mere enjoyment of having him close to her. "You may want to wrap your arms around a bit more," he said to her, his voice only just audible, "because we're going to nosedive, and we don't want you to fall, do we?"

He watched her expression carefully; she blushed and smiled. And with that, he nosedived.  
"WOAH," she cried in suprise, the feeling of going downwards overcoming her. She felt so alive, with the wind in her hair and the roaring of appriceation from the crowd below. All too soon, it was over. Sirius hovered by the ground, and climbed off his broomstick. Narcissa got off too, but lost all sense of balance from being in the sky so long. She stumbled, but he caught her, his arms around her middle. "Careful," said Sirius, "You don't want to fall over." Narcissa wasn't sure if it was her imagination, but she could of sworn he held her in a way he had never done before. He let go, and Remus walked over. "Have fun?" he was not sarcastic for once, but generally inquistive, smiling. "I've never really liked riding a broomstick ..."  
"That's cause you've never tried, Moony," said James, as he held his Nimbus in one hand, his second hand wrapped around Lily's waist. They were both grinning; both so happy.  
"True," replied Remus, scratching his chin, "Not sure if it's my cup of tea though."

_Blood Traitor._  
The voice was very clear in Narcissa's mind, and she stumbled slightly as the voice penetrated, blocking out every sound around them, apart from her own voice and his.

_Blood Traitor ..._

_**I'm not a Blood Traitor! Who are you?**__  
Such LIES, Narcissa ... I am the one they fear the most. Your dear sister, _a mirthless laugh rang sharply around her mind, _was a dissapointment to me, I must confess. It is a shame you are not one of us; I had ideas that you would be great._

And with that, the voice dissapeared, and she shook her head. "What's wrong?"  
It was Sirius's voice, his eyes looking at her with something reserved uncannily.  
"Nothing," she replied with an unconvicing smile, "but I couldn't say no to a Butterbeer ..." Sirius, although still not convinced, grinned and took her hand. "Cmon then - help us Moony-" and with that, Sirius helped her regain her balance, and when Remus wasn't looking, squeezed her hand comfortingly, as if reassuring her he was there for her.  
James yawned massively. "Let's go - I want to celebrate and rub it in Slytherin's faces, haha!"  
And with that, they all went off to the castle, talking together and laughing. Narcissa followed suit with the laughter, but figured it would be better not to spill the beans about what had really happened.


	18. Chapter 18

"I have to go soon," said Narcissa after her sixth helping of Butterbeer, "Bellatrix will be wondering where I have got to; we leave together in half an hour or so." She was sitting opposite the flickering flames that were held back from spitting by a charm, the marble fireplace glowing as it reflected the happy yet somewhat tired faces in front of it. Above the fireplace was a thin yet tall mirror, in which, from time to time, someone from a portrait would enter to spy upon them for their own personal entertainment. Narcissa was sitting on the ruby coloured couch, her eyelids drooping. She had her head on Remus's lap and her feet over Sirius's, and if she were left to her own devices, she would not of wanted to get up. Sirius shifted his weight. "It'll be nice not to have a heavy lump such as yourself resting upon me for much longer."  
"I regret it," she replied with a flicker of a smile, sitting up with considerable effort. The warm atmosphere was so inviting to stay and dwell upon, but she had to go. Pushing her blonde hair off her face and behind her shoulders, she stood up, and couldn't help but to catch herself looking in the mirror. She wasn't as skinny as she had been on her arrival at Hogwarts last september, she had filled out. Her blue eyes were now more vibrant, but by her expression that was worn when she had nothing to contribute, it was obvious secrets were hidden beneath the mask she wore. After regarding her reflection for a few more moments, she turned to consider her boyfriend, cousin and friends. "I better get going."  
Remus stood, a tired yet weary expression crossing his face. He approached her: their lips met, just. It lasted less than a second, so it seemed. His lips brushed against hers but she did not respond. She was worried about the possibilities that faced her at home - what did her parents want? Was it because her grades had slipped? She somehow doubted that, but even so. James and Wormtail nodded at her before bidding farewell, too lazy to get to their feet. Sirius however, stood up.

"Take care. When will you be back?"  
"Tomorrow evening, I would imagine."  
Wormtail sloshed most of his Butterbeer down his front as his eyes closed, falling asleep. James supressed a laugh, and Sirius had an odd smile on his face. He glanced at Remus, who was sitting back down again, his own eyes closing with fatigue. "See ya, dear cousin."  
"Right back at _ya, Padfoot."_ Her own attempt at amusing sarcasam caused him to smile again. She left in a flourish, cheeks burning, her mind on fire. The voice of "the one they feared most" had echoed numbly through her brain through the celebration. She had tried to block it out but it kept coming back, worse each time. She half ran, half walked, to were Bellatrix was waiting. Her long dark hair was maddening, poofing out like a Peacock when it broadens it's feathers in elegance. Her dark eyes bored into Narcissa's calming blue ones, and she simpered slightly. A carriage awaited them that pulled itself, waiting patiently. They clambered aboard and it set off at a steady yet efficent pace, towards the boats.

Two hours and a short sleep later, they were in their own home. Bellatrix was acting odd, she kept rushing to the mirror in the large hallway to perfect her hair every five minutes, or to check on her make-up. Narcissa didn't think it was a good idea to dwell on her sisters actions, but it did feel good to be back - even if it was only momentarily. Acting on instinct, Narcissa wandered into the kitchen and poured herself a generous amount of Firewhisky, when a loud _crack _made her drop out of her skin, and drop the glass. It shattered into millions of pieces, the liquid from it spilling all over the floor.  
"Sorry, miss!" whimpered an unlucky elf, cowering as if it expected to be hit in punishment. She smiled warmly at the elf - it had never been her intention to inflict pain on an animal, or elf. Pointing her wand at the glass, she murmured "_Reparo_,"and it shot back together, and landed on the work-top. Picking up some cleaning facilty that her mother swore by, she began to wipe up the liquid. She glanced up at the trembling elf, still smiling. "It's okay, Athena," she reassured, "but could you get me some more drink?"  
"Yes, miss," squeaked the elf, it's giant tennis-ball like eyes glistening with tears. It rushed over to the fridge and returned a nano-second later with a bottle of Firewhisky, and poured her another generous measure.  
"Thanks, Athena," replied Narcissa, sipping her drink in a relaxed manner. "How are you?"  
"Okay, thank you miss," replied Athena, looking shabby and exhausted, "just tired."  
Narcissa sighed, her parents were so cruel to their elves, and never did appriceate their methods towards their servants. "Athena," she begun, in a voice that defined authority and power, "As I am one of your mistresses, I order you to go have some sleep."  
Athena's eyes glistened.  
"Thank you, Mistress!" she whimpered, and with another loud _crack_, she was gone. Narcissa swilled the orange coloured liquid around in her glass, speculating upon why she and her sister had been summoned home at such an inappropiate time. Placing the empty glass on the work-top with a slight bang, she stood up and wandered into the hallway, deciding to go to her bedroom for a while to read. Narcissa was only half-way up the stairs when her sisters cries caused her to slow.  
"We were not expecting you til later," she gushed, and Narcissa could imagine the doe-eyed expression on her sisters face, as she attempted to please whichever guest was visiting. She sat on the stairs, gazing through the slats that held the staircase up. Their vistor's face was not in view, and their voice could not be heard. Bellatrix continued to gush, banter and flatter their guest, running a hand through her hair as she attempted to emphasise the length she had gone to. At last, a noise was only just heard: someone kissing her sisters hand. Rolling her eyes, Narcissa stood up again, only to be stopped.  
"I guess you would like to see her, now?" her sister asked, twirling a strand of dark hair around her finger, her eyelids batting. Whoever it was confirmed this question, and Bellatrix called to her sister. "Narcissa - somebody is here to see you."  
Half-dithering whether or not to ignore her sister, Narcissa made her way down the staircase, and looked at her sister, an eyebrow raised. "Well?"  
"Narcissa," said the voice she was used to, but not in person, "It's an honour to meet you, I daresay I hope the feeling is mutual?"

She froze. It was him.


	19. Chapter 19

"You," hissed Narcissa, not caring that she was facing the most evil face of the decade. He smiled, his face carelessly handsome. He reminded her of Sirius, and he seemed to recognize this flicker in her mind. Why did her cousin always seem to enter her mind at inappropiate times?  
"Sirius?" His smile was not encouraging. His dark eyes seemed to flash scarlet as she attempted to block him out, but he had to remember himself, and where he was. He couldn't upset dear Bellatrix, could he? No, no. He must tread carefully upon this limited hospitality; and he took Narcissa's hand. His own hand was ice cold; it seemed like no blood rushed through his veins at all. It was as if his blood stream had been paused, and he was living in an outer shell of non existance. He brushed his lips against her hand, which gave a slight involuntary twitch as she debated about pulling away. He continued to smile, as he straightened up.  
"Why are you scared of me so, Narcissa?"  
She did not answer, her heart racing faster and faster. She could not tear her eyes away from his striking yet somewhat hypnotising brown ones, it was if he had a sort of power-hold over her. Which of course, he did. He had not expected her to reply.  
"Bellatrix," he addressed the dark haired witch with some consideration, his eyes boring into her dilated ones, "Would it be so much trouble to ask you to find Narcissa and I a room which will remain undisturbed; I want to talk to your sister and only her." Bellatrix's chest heaved as he addressed her directly, her eyes glittering. She nodded, and led them both to the second living room, and left quickly, her skirt twirling as she did. Voldemort indicated the two sofas, and he sat on the one nearest the window. Narcissa hesitantly sat on the one opposite him. He did not address her for some time; he was just watching her. She felt unable to break eye-contact, and so she stared back.

"Your sister tells me you were not interested in joining my group of friends-"  
"Friends? Sorry, Voldemort - I was under the impression they were your dogsbodys."  
His eyes flashed scarlet, and she was silenced.  
"Your opinion is appriceated," he said coldly, "but not necessary. But, nevertheless, you were not interested in joining when I was looking for recruitments - this caused me to wonder why. You seem a smart, clever girl, Narcissa, but your sister tells me something dissapointing. You are related to Sirius Black, am I correct?"  
She scowled.  
"Do not scowl, girl, it is most unbecoming. Your cousin, Sirius Black, is not only a dissapointment to the pureblood regime - but I am prepared to say he was more of a dissapointment than his brother, Regulus-"  
Her grip around the arm of the couch tightened, her face contorted with pain and misery.

"And, I have reason to believe, girl, that you are comminucating with him on a regular basis? You are comminucating with a blood traitor, and as for his friends," he paused to give a somewhat scornful laugh, "they are not much better. The Werewolf, so troubled with his affliction, his mind doubting you almost every moment of the day, the small, fat boy, so hesitant towards all of you, the Potter boy, so unknowing towards were his fate lies ... and you wish to go the same way as them?"  
Her eyes bored into his now, and she dared to speak. "This week has been tear stained and imperfect."  
"And since when is life perfect?" He leant forward, his fingertips pressed closely together, as if in prayer, "I'm correct to say it isn't. You think you're hard-done to girl? Think again."  
Narcissa couldn't cry. The tears collected within her eye sockets, but never showed themselves to her retinas. His expression, was for a moment, almost of pity.

"Your friends, cousin and afflicted boyfriend," the words came out harsher than he had intended them to, his eyes darkening, "are causing you pain, if unintentional." He looked into her mind, as if opening doors to her brain. She felt him intruding; but felt too weak to stop him. "The Werewolf, uncertain of his love for you, the Potter boy, curious as to how loyal you truely are, Pettigrew, secretly terrified of you, and your cousin ..." he paused, wondering whether or not to relay this information. Her attention had pricked up now, just by a slight movement closer to him. "Your cousin loves you more than he has loved anybody. But he is impure, and should you go that way, you will be impure too."  
"You think I care about being impure?" Her voice broke. His smile grew.  
"Yes, Narcissa, I do. Because if you didn't, you would not be trying to prove yourself to me right now." He leaned back on the couch, his right hand scratching the back of his neck as if lost in thought. He stopped, then looked at her again. "Narcissa," he said softly, "it is your destiny to join us."  
"No, it's not. This heart is were I truely lie."  
"Is that so?" his face contorted, anger over-came him. "Perhaps you are not destined to be a Death Eater, but you are destined to keep your loyalties lying with us."  
She stood up, her eyes now spilling the tears she had been holding back. "I shall think about it." The lie was obvious, but he seemed to believe it.  
"Good girl," he cooed, standing up now. His cold hand traced her cheek and she shuddered. He headed to the door, but paused. "And - as for Sirius Black," his eyes seemed to glitter, "Despite his love for you ... I would not suggest following it up. Goodbye, Narcissa."

And with that, he vanished.


	20. Chapter 20

After sitting face to face with the ultimate murderer and master of betraylment, Narcissa felt quite uneasy. She confined herself to her superior bedroom, and sat on the midnight themed double bed, her fingers tracing the star-patterned quilt as she lost herself in thought. Why did he have to place seeds of doubt in her mind? She had no real desire to join "the dark side" as her sister called it; she wanted to be left alone and enjoy life the way it should be enjoyed. Lying back on the pillows, she had the sudden urge to sleep out the pain, yet she was not tired. At that moment, a brown owl she did not recognize sat on her windowsill, tapping the window panes with it's beak impatiently. Sitting up, she climbed off her bed and opened the window, letting a cold breeze in. The owl was now perched ontop of her dresser, ruffling it's feathers. The letter perched in it's beak dropped to the floor carelessly. She bent and picked it up, unsealed the envelope, and retrieved a short letter. She recongised Sirius's untidy scrawl immediatley, and a smile covered her face.

_Dear Cissy, _he had wrote,

_I hope you're alright. Granted, you've only been gone a few hours but already things are becoming uncertain. Something is up with Remus, but when isn't? James has gone off somewere with Lily, and I've left Wormtail in the library, he was bugging me so I left him there - and decided to write to you. What's going on there? Strange for your parents to summon you home so quickly; we all await your return, dear cousin._

Love,

_Sirius x x x_

The letter in her hand crumpled, and even though he wasn't in the room she blushed. He'd put the word love. He'd also put three kisses. Voldemort had told her what Sirius regarded her with, but should she really believe someone as evil as himself? A selfish impulse struck her all of a sudden - when she saw Sirius next, she would be brutually honest with him about how they both felt about one another. Would he admit the feeling was mutual? Probably not. He was too much of a joker in most serious times. Grabbing a role of parchment on her desk, along with an inkpot and quill, she scribbled back furiously.

_Dearest cousin,_

_I'm okay. Voldemort came and talked to me; he wants me to join his side. I really don't think the question he asked is going to recieve an affirmiative, do you? Remus is probably furious with me because I don't shower him with love as much as I should; I regret it. It's just - I don't think I can right now. I can't explain why. Good on you for abandoning Wormtail, shame it couldn't be permanent! Only kidding. I still am unaware as to what my parents want to discuss, but I guess we'll just have to wait and see. Write back,_

_Lots,__ of love,_

_Narcissa x x_

Attatching her response to the owl, it nipped her affectionatley before flying out of the window. She sighed, and rummaged through her back, and retrieved the photo albumn James had given her for Christmas. Propping herself up against her sequined pillows, she began to flick through the photos. The first one was of all five of them, laughing together into the camera. She was in the middle of Remus and Sirius, and she hadn't really noticed it at the time, but in the photo, his arm went to slide around her waist, but decided against it, and at the precise moment the camera had flashed, he looked into the camera with a dazzling smile and gleaming blue eyes. Remus was looking tired (was full moon approaching? Her memory escaped her now.) James and Wormtail were pushing each other, just to be annoying, but both smiling. The next photograph was of her and James, and he was doing the peace sign above her head, and she was looking at him, laughing with amusement. She turned a page, and the photo of her and Remus kissing moved in animation before her eyes. A tear splashed onto the picture. She looked at the next photo. Her eyes became large; she had certainly not remembered this being taken. It was of Sirius and her, and he was talking to her, looking intently into her eyes. She slammed the albumn shoot and threw it down the bed. Why did she have to be reminded of it - again?

"Narcissa! Dinner!"  
Her mothers shrill call could not go ignored, so dragging herself to her feet, she limped downstairs. Bellatrix was already eating some sort of stew, which looked disgusting. Narcissa took a seat by her sister, and took a slice of bread, dipping it into her stew, whilst gazing at her mother apphrensively. "So - what did you both do at school today?"  
Her mothers tones were beyond caring; it was clear she had no real interest in what either of her daughters did. Bellatrix made an uncommital noise, and Narcissa merely said, "Watched the Quidditch match - Gryffindor versues Slytherin."  
"Oh, good," replied her mother, not really listening. "Who won?"  
"Gryffindor," said Narcissa with a smile. Her mother sighed.  
"Narcissa, you and I have something to discuss." Her mothers tones became nicer now, almost sweet. Her smile was transfixed upon her blonde daughter, making her feel uneasy. "How's Lucius Malfoy these days?"  
Narcissa shrugged.  
"Well, there is no easy way to say this, dear." Her mother leant forward slightly, light radiating from the diamond necklace around her neck, "You're marrying him."  
Narcissa choked. "I - _what_?"

Her mother nodded. "Yes ... arranged marriage would of been too common, but you will have to marry him."  
"And why," Narcissa replied bitterly, "Would I do that?"  
"Many, many reasons. Firstly, he is pureblood; so are you. It will keep up the tradition. Secondly, we are running out of money, and his wealth is delightful. Very rich, are the Malfoys. And, we need that money. Being broke does not suit us, Narcissa. I hope you understand the warning symbols of this situation."  
Narcissa stood up and kicked her chair aside. "I will NOT marry scum like Lucius Malfoy; who cares if we are broke? Other families survive without the luxuries we live with. Why should it make any difference? Bellatrix is marrying Rodolphus WILLINGLY, and he is rich. So, that shall tide you over, should it not?"  
Her mother shook her head. "Rodolphus Lestrange is not as rich as the Malfoys, dear."  
Narcissa went to storm out of the room. "Well, you can forget me marrying Lucius, mother." And with that, she slammed the door, and ran upstairs to her bedroom, locking the door savagely. She threw herself onto her bed and began to cry. Marry Lucius? No, she wouldn't. She couldn't. She never would ,ever.


	21. Chapter 21

Narcissa did not sleep that night. She tossed and turned, but it was all in vain. When she did finally sleep, it was a nightmare. Remus was mocking her as he had done by the lake, but it all seemed so much more real now. She could taste the air, feel the touch of his hair, re-feel the emotions of what she went through. The scene kept replaying as if to torture her, but she endured it. When she awoke, she looked somewhat refreshed. It was if she had battled her nightmare, and by doing so she had beaten Voldemort again. But only just. Glancing at the old fashioned clock on her dresser, she was informed it was eleven o'clock. Slightly suprised at her long sleep, she spoke into the now sunlit room. "Athena?" There was a loud crack, and the house elf appeared, bobbing her head from side to side as she greeted her mistress. "Mistress!" squeaked Athena, "What can I get you?"  
Narcissa smiled, running a hand through her hair. "Some toast would be nice ..."  
"French toast?"   
"No, no, just toast."  
But the elf had already dissapeared. Sighing slightly, she padded along to the bathroom, and showered quickly, washing her hair carefully. After a ten minute shower and hairwash, she wrapped a fluffy dressing gown around her and wrapped her hair in a turbun, before walking back into her bedroom. A tray had been set on her bed, complete with French toast and fresh orange juice - and, a letter? Dropping down onto the bed, she picked up the letter, and unsealed it carefully. It must be Sirius replying. And, so it was.

_Dear Cissy,_

_  
Thanks for your quick response, I was actually wondering if you'd forget about me or not, I know how pureblood-obsessed you can become at times. _She laughed at his pointed sarcasam, and leaning back against the wall, she resumed reading. _I agree with you about Moony, it's upsetting. I'll try speak to him later. And, bloody hell, why the hell would Voldemort want you to join his rebellion? Isn't it painstakingly obvious you're a good pureblood? Wait - is there such a thing? Oh yeah, there is, cause I'm one too. Don't bother replying, as you'll be back later anyway, so there wouldn't be much point. We just sat through a rather boring Potions lesson, listening to Slughorn praise Malfoy because he'd finally made one good potion - I mean, who cares? Slimey git. Anyway - see you later. _

_Love you,  
Sirius x x x _

She smoothed the letter down and put it in her photo albumn for safe keeping. She undid her turbin, and pointed her wand at it, murmuring a spell that would dry it completely. All of a sudden, her wet dripping hair turned into thick, lushious, warm hair, curling at her chest as it usually did. Picking up some toast, she decided what she was going to do for the rest of the day. Just getting ready to go back to Hogwarts, she supposed. Bellatrix would be returning at 8 o'clock precisely, whereas Narcissa wished to return at 4 o'clock, so she could catch up with her friends after their last lesson. Grabbing some rolls of parchment, she began to finish a couple of essays, but that didn't take very long. She yawned - being at home was so boring! Her eyes began to droop, and she dropped her head on the desk, and fell asleep.  
Narcissa awoke, and to her delight saw it was half past three. She got changed quickly into her uniform and robes, and stuffed a few possessions in her bag; most of them were at school, anyway. Running downstairs, she made her way to the modernised fireplace, and grabbed some floo power. "Hogwarts!" she said clearly, and within a nano second, had vanished admist emerald flames.  
She arrived with a bump in the headmasters office, and was delighted to see Albus Dumbledore was sitting there, as if waiting. He inclined his head towards her in greeting but did not speak, so she returned the nod with a smile, before dusting herself down and heading out of his office. Descending the gargoyle, she looked around. People were leaving classrooms, talking and laughing together, looking relaxed. They must of finished the last lesson of the day. She walked past her empty Transfiguration classroom, when somebody threw their arms around her. "Cissy!"

It was Sirius. As he hugged her, there was just ... something about it that nobody could describe unless they themselves experienced it. It was the way his hands traced down her back and rested around her waist; the warmth of his body brushing against hers. She responded by brushing her lips against his smooth cheek in greeting, her hands running through his constantly messy hair. Although slightly too intimate for normal cousins, nobody appeared to care. They broke free. It was good Remus, James and Peter weren't around; suspicions would be running high. "Where are the others?" she asked, rubbing her cheek. 

"Common room - I think." He turned to leave. "You coming?"  
"What do you think?" she smiled, and accompanied him towards the picture of the fat lady. "After all - there's something I need to tell you."  
He didn't meet her eyes, but continued walking. "And what would that be?"  
"You'll find out soon enough," she replied wearily. He glanced at her with suprise, but there was not much he could do. They stood in front of the portrait of the fat lady, and Sirius muttered the password, before the door swung open in acceptance. Stepping through the hole, they found themselves in a somewhat empty common room. Narcissa sat by the fire on the couch, Sirius sat in the arm chair on her right. He surveyed her through glittering eyes, as if waiting for her to speak. But she couldn't. The words she wanted to say got stuck in her throat so she passed it off as a cough. He continued to watch her thoughtfully. "I think," he said after a while, "they're running a little late. Perhaps they have a detention or something ... I really don't know." He grinned at her, and she smiled.  
"Sirius," she whispered, suprised to find her voice suprisingly quiet, "there's something I have to tell you and only you; and this is different from what I'll be telling all of you later." He was listening intently now, as she had presumed he would. She gulped, and then swallowed. A pit of forbidding circled her stomach, but she brushed it aside. "I don't want this to change anything between us, but it probably will unintentionally ... but ... I love you."  
He did not seem suprised; if anything the intensity of his gaze grew stronger. It caused her to blush, and her blonde hair fell over her face. He opened his mouth to reply, his cheeks darkening, "I lo-"

They were interuppted by the portait door swinging open, and in climbed Peter, James and Remus. They joined Sirius and Narcissa, looking bright and alert. "You're back early, Narcissa," teased James, "I bet you couldn't wait to be back in Hogwarts after all that guff you face at home."  
She smiled at him, reminding herself that they didn't know Sirius was trying to reply to what she had admitted. Sirius was pale now; the crimson that had momentarily appeared on his cheeks had begun to fade.  
"There's something I have to tell you all," she said quietly, and all eyes fixed upon hers, questioningly. "Well ..."  
"Hurry up," yawned James, "I'm hungry."  
She thwacked his arm. "Shut up, _Prongs! _But seriously. My parents summoned me home to bequest me with a wish of theirs."  
"And what would that wish be?" winked Sirius. She rolled her eyes.  
"My mother wants me to marry Lucius Malfoy as our profits are not sufficient enough for her liking; and they have alot of money."  
This caused alot of fury between them.  
"That's INSANE," shrieked James, and Narcissa was momentarily reminded of a girl.  
"I don't get it," said Wormtail. "But it must be bad if James is acting like a girly-girl."  
"They can't - Bellatrix is marrying Rodolphus and he is extremely rich; won't that do?" pondered Remus.

Sirius said nothing. His eyes merely burned.  
"Apparently, Rodolphus Lestrange is not as "wealthly equipped" as Lucius Malfoy, the git." Narcissa sank back into the couch, worry penetraying her face. "I don't know what to do."


	22. Chapter 22

The silence that filled the room was not only awkward by the pointed looks from Remus and James, but because the situation was turning out to be a dire, unsolveable one. Would she have to be forced into marriage with somebody who treated her as if she was porcelian, and broke her every single time? Narcissa sighed, and felt indignation rise up in her throat. This just wasn't fair! Wormtail seemed mildly confused as to why Narcissa marrying Lucius was a problem.  
"_Because_, Wormtail, she's going out with me." Remus explained in a tone that defined the word sarcasam to a T. Narcissa shifted uncomfortably, her cheeks glowing. Sirius appeared to be lost in a mild contemplation, his glittering eyes surveying the flickering flames with thought. "Did you - you know," he spoke, his voice clear through the crackle of the flames, "actually tell them you had no intention of marrying him?"  
Narcissa nodded.

Sirius looked lost in thought for another moment or so. "Perhaps," he said, his tone grave, "You should consider ... running away." The idea of her running away was so preposterus, she couldn't help but to start giggling. "Ha ha - okay, I'll just run away to no-mans-land."

But he was serious. "Think about it, Cissy," he leant forward slightly in his armchair, now directing his voice to her only. "They'll probably come after you, and force you into marriage, yeah? What if we try to dodge them, go into hiding for a bit, then you marry ... you marry ..." The words "marry Remus" caught in his throat, but with a brave attempt he finished his sentence as to not arouse suspicison: "Marry ... Remus ... and they won't be able to do anything 'cause you're already married, yeah?

Narcissa considered this idea. "And where would we go into hiding, dear cousin?"  
At this, he looked lost. "Not Grimmauld Place, obviously. Maybe ..."  
"Godwicks Ollow?" suggested Wormtail through a mouthful of Pumpkin Pastie.  
"_GodRICKS Hollow_." corrected Sirius with a sigh, unable to restrain the sarcasam that flickered through his words. "But that's a possibility, but again, too dangerous."  
"How about," said James slowly, sipping a Butterbeer that he had retrieved from his robe, "Potter Manor - I mean, my house. We have quite a bit of room, so..."  
Sirius looked delighted. "Really?"  
James shrugged. "I don't see why not - what problems could it cause? So - my parents are jetting away at the Mythical lake of Odelas, trying to spot a few Giants, so I doubt they'd mind whether you lot," he indicated Narcissa, Remus and Sirius, "stayed if they were there or not. And as for Wormtail - you concentrate on your studies. We're all top in our classes, but you're behind. You stay and pursue your education, ectera." Wormtail didn't look too happy at this, but nodded anyway. It wasn't that he was dumb ... he was just educationally challenged? A smile flitted across Narcissa's face at this, but then resumed a solitudary expression. "Aw, James ... that'd be brilliant." she smiled appricieatevely at him and he grinned lopsidedly.

"So - when are we going?" Sirius had already jumped to his feet, pushing back his messy hair as he surveyed the rest of them all, with brilliant blue eyes. James pondered, ruffling his messy hair as he sank back into the ruby cushioning. Then he grinned. "Now?"  
"Wait."   
They turned to look at Remus. "Won't it be sort of obvious if we all like, use the floo network? They can track us, you know. If the school has kind of been inflitrated; what about the ministry? Who's to say there aren't a few spies there?" Narcissa looked admiringly at him; he was _so_ smart at times. He grinned at her. James, however, sighed impatiently. "We fly, Moony."  
"Come on, let's get outta here," said Sirius. He looked at her. His eyes were clearly saying, _I want to take your hand and dissapear. _She brushed it aside; she should really stop imagining things.  
Ten minutes later, once they'd packed the things they needed most, they advised Wormtail to tell Dumbledore privatley of their plans of ending their education briefly; and with that, grabbing a Broomstick each, they flew off out of the grounds, radiantly sharing joy over the sky and ocean. It was amazing.  
A sense of well-being seeped through her skin as they landed to the enterance of Potter Manor. Entering with a swagger, James introduced them all to his grand surroundings. It was only just smaller then Narcissa's own house, but the ulterior design was amazing. Crystal Chandeliers hung over their heads as they walked along the wide hallway, careful not to sabatage the Ruby runway. James indicated the kitchen, and pointed his wand lazily at the silver fridge; four bottles of Butterbeer flew out and one almost smashed. "Oops," he grinned, clearly not caring at all. Narcissa drank the golden liquid quick, and excused herself to the lounge area. Sirius followed.  
He sat next to her, and listened to her breath. She looked at him wistfully. Did she detect a flicker of lust in his eyes? No, she didn't. Oh lord; she was becoming deliquent. Remus and James entered and flopped on the cream couches, and began to garble things that did not make much sense. Narcissa suspected they were drunk. Her theory was proven; they were stashing Firewhisky under their robes. Sighing, she stood. "I feel a bit tired, I'm going to lie down," she murmured.  
"Want me to show you were to go?" James hiccupped, looking out of it.  
"That's okay ... you relax." she turned to go.  
"I'll show you."  
"Thanks Sirius."

They both went upstairs, and Sirius easily found a pretty, crisp spare bedroom. It was big and fairly pleasant, the view from the tinted windows could only just be seen, and it reflected a sky blue surrounding, with dashes of green representing the grass; or so she thought. She turned to her bed, were Sirius was sitting. A sense of forboding grasped her as he beckoned her to sit next to him, but she pushed it aside, blinking as if nervous.  
"About what you said before, Narcissa ..." he begun, his eyes looking directly at her face.  
"It was silly, I know." she murmured, not looking at him for fear of not only listening to rejection but facing it too.  
"No, it wasn't. I- I love you too." he swallowed, running his hands through his hair in exasperation. She smiled faintly, but still felt like she couldn't raise her eyes to look at him properly. It was too awkward. The tension that surrounded the room was like chemicals threatening to explode kudos a dangerous potion. The air was so thick, you could cut a knife through it.  
"So ... what do we do now?"  
"Narcissa, do you really need to ask?"  
"Yes, I _do, _Sirius." she looked at him finally, her eyes sparkling with indigination (and the light rays from the outside sunshine.) Neither of them could of stopped it. He leant forward, cupping her face in his hands, and pressed a tender kiss on her forehead, his hands slipping through her golden-like hair. "Sure?" he whispered. She debated. It was wrong - extremely wrong. She smiled again. He pressed his lips against hers after taking her smile as a yes, and it was if fireworks set off around them. The feeling of his lips on hers in reality after so long wondering about everything felt euphoric. Her hands clasped around his waist as he pressed the kiss more passionatley, teasing her with his kisses occasionally. They paused for a brief moment, then both laughed. "You're a good kisser," she said breathlessly, falling back on her bed.  
"So are you."   
The laughter was replaced with nerves instantly. What had she done? What about Remus? What about her priorities? Would this be considered Incest? Oh god, oh god, oh god. "Sirius ... we ..."  
"I know, I know. We can't go out, ever."  
"Ever?"  
"Yeah! But ... I'll always be here for you. Despite everything ... despite all these family problems, friend problems, PUREBLOOD mania ... despite everything, always."  
Her cheeks flushed with happiness and sadness combined.  
"Besides," he continued, "it's not like anyone else fancies me. . ."  
She snorted, and hit him with a pillow. "Whatever, you're ruthlessly handsome ... everyone fancies you."  
He smiled dutifully, dodging the attempted sabatage by a pillow with ease. "You're the one I like most."  
"Really?"  
He just grinned at her.


	23. Chapter 23

** I haven't been writing for a few days due to Writers Block, so I hope you guys enjoy this ;) **

After a few days, tension cut through the house. Remus was constantly re-reading the Daily Prophet, looking through every article in hope to find any news regarding Voldemort. Then, he found something. "Look! There's been another murder!"  
"That's great, mate," said Sirius sarcastially, "Lovely way to start the day." Remus ignored this comment, and smoothing the newspaper out on the large coffee table in front of them, pointed out the article. Narcissa leant forward, and began to read out aloud.

_"At exactly noon yesturday afternoon, the body of Ridarco Higglesworth was recovered in his home near Little Hangleton Graveyard. He was discovered by Susmr Hutch, employee at the Ministry of Magic. 'We have reason to believe that Lord thing and his followers were after Mr Higglesworth, although evidence is low, we can establish he was inflicted with the killing curse.' he said earlier today. No one has reason yet to understand why Mr Higglesworth was murdered. Could he of sustained exceedingly important information that was required? Turn to page three for more ..." _she broke off, and glanced at them all. "I - well, mother knew Ridarco. He was-"  
"A family friend, yeah." finished Sirius, looking seriously at them all. "He was on rather good terms with my mother."  
"Perhaps," mused James, "he's killing off people we hold dearest to us."  
"I doubt that," murmured Narcissa, "I am close to all of you; and are any of you dead? No. He knows how-"  
James sat up straight. "And he knows we're important to you ... because he visited you at your house, right?"  
Narcissa nodded, sinking back into the couch with a sigh. "I should of lied to him-"

"No - you couldn't of. He's excellent at delving into the mind - remember how he tortured you, Narcissa? So, that's one possiblity cut short ..." he did not look paticularly sympathetic as he referred to her past encounter at being tortured. She frowned at him, but held her tongue. James was looking mystified, but let it slide, sipping his Butterbeer in earnst. And that's when the argument broke.  
"No need to be so blunt, Remus."  
"Sirius - this - that's not the point!"  
"Really? I thought it was."  
Remus and Sirius both stood up, suprisingly accurate in height and anger, their hands clenched around their wands. It was clear they were attempting to sustain the diplomatic negotiations for as long as possible. James looked disgruntled. "Padfoot, Moony - sit DOWN."  
They ignored him.  
"Why so touchy, Sirius?"  
It was a good enough question. Usually, Sirius wouldn't of defended any family member as quick as that, but things were different now. He shook his head as if trying to dislodge an annoying fixation, his eyes boring into Remus's. "I'm not," he muttered, "just ... forget it, okay?"  
Remus glared, then sighed, before sinking back down into the armchair. He twirled his wand around in his hands, glaring at the fire as if had caused him great disturbance. James stood up, eventually. "I'm going to owl to my mum and dad ... see how they are." He walked out of the room, his hands in his pockets, a slightly hurt expression on his face.

Sirius slumped into an armchair opposite Remus, and looked extremely surly. Narcissa supressed speaking out with difficulty; as a cold, sleek voice filtered through her mind. "_You did not listen to me, Narcissa," _he said, and her mind exploded with horrible images of massacres of them all dying, and loosing in battle. _"I warned you what would happen if you didn't stick to regulations - what's that I see in your mind? A spark of indignation, fury, even? My, growing quite sentimental aren't we?" _He chuckled, and it echoed around her mind. His handsome features were changing slowly; his usual brown eyes were glowing scarlet, his facial expression adapted to what appeared to be loathing. "_Silly girl. You'll be loyal to us even if you don't want to be - I'll make sure of that. Forget these half bloods, traitors of the kind - redeem your pureblood self, and recongise your potential." _The voice cut short as soon as it had begun, and as she came back into reality, Narcissa realised she had been clutching her forehead so hard, that she had drawn segiments of blood. Remus and Sirius had forgotten their miniature feud as they rushed to her side. "Narcissa, what-"  
"What happened-"  
Everything was cut short when the door blew open, and several people arrived dressed in black, surrounded by a dark mist. Bellatrix was among the so called recruitment team, her dark eyes glittering. "Hello, Cissy," she hissed, stepping forward and extending a hand. "Come to join us?" Bellatrix put her head to one side, and considered her sister for some time. "No?" her voice was barely audible, "AVADA KEDABRA!"  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Narcissa awoke in a hot sweat. Sirius was looking at her in concern, wiping a hand over her forehead. "It's OK," he soothed, "it was just a nightmare." She edged herself up on her elbows, Remus fussing as he tried to make her more comfortable. Although he meant well, his fussing irriated her.  
"I don't think it was a nightmare," she snapped, her moodswing over-coming her. "It was too real for it to be an illusion."  
Remus resumed his sarcastic self. It didn't suit him at all. "Oh, so it was Lord Voldemort penetraying your mind?"  
She looked at him directly. "Yes."  
His expression changed. "You need to try and block him out, Narcissa-"  
"I _am_ trying," said she, on the verge of tears. Remus placed a hand on her arm soothingly, and she calmed a little, her heart beating abnormally fast. Sirius had a look of anger on his face. "You were kinda - twitching - and when you woke up - I saw something leave your eyes."  
"Leave my eyes? How do you mean?"  
Sirius shrugged, as if implying he wasn't sure what he'd seen. James came bustling in, flicking his wand about merrily, red sparks flying out as he contemplated in solitude. Suddenly; the doors really did swing open, and as bursts of bright, neon lights shot past Narcissa's eyes, she knew it was all over.

"Let me go!"  
"Be quiet, POTTER!" roared Goyle, his fat belly bouncing as he strode in front of James. All four of them were tied up in what appeared to be a dusty cell. Narcissa attempted in vain to undo her ropes, but no such luck. She rocked back on her chair legs angrily. Their wands had been taken off them, and were guarded by Crabbe, who had the mannerisms (and intelligence) of a confunded troll.  
"No! Why have we been tied up!" James thrashed about in his chair angrily.  
"SILENCE!"  
"NO-"  
"_CRUCIO_!"  
James screamed in pain as he was inflicted, and Goyle laughed proudly. James was ghostly white now, with a feverish tinge to his cheeks. He was staring at Goyle with disgust. "Think you're the big man, don't you?"  
Goyle retaliated by punching him. Narcissa inhaled sharply; but James just smiled. "That's quite muggle for you, Goyle."  
"Drop it, mate," murmured Sirius, trying to get his ropes off and look out for the others at the same time. His eyes swivelled around the room, as if looking for a way out. Bellatrix entered the room, at the arm of Lord Voldemort. Her hair seemed neat for once, but her eyes glittered the madness she had occupied for so long. Voldemort's expression gave nothing away; his face was completely blank. He tilted his head to one side, as if watching them as a predator would consider it's prey before attacking. "Sirius Black, blood traitor." Voldemort began to pace backwards and forth, as he reeled off their faults and names. "James Potter, blood traitor and a general infilitration to our kind. Remus Lupin," his lip curled, "half-breed, not that I'm suprised - very common background you come from, Remus ... and dear Narcissa Black. Blood traitor, yes, but also very confused." he paused. "Where is Wormtail?" They did not answer him, and so he pointed his wand threateningly at Remus. "Where is he?" his tones were calm, but anger filtered through like daylight through net curtains. Remus swallowed, as if wondering whether or not he should answer Voldemort. "_CRUCIO!"_ Remus's screams echoed the room; it was too terrible to bare witness to.  
"He's - at Hogwarts," gasped Remus, tears welling up in his eyes from the pain. Voldemort smirked.  
"Dear Remus - was that hard? You leave him behind because he does not fit to your standards-"  
"It's nothing like that-"  
"SILENCE." Voldemorts eyes flashed scarlet for a brief moment, and he continued, in the same monotonous voice. "And do you think your friends actually accept you? James does, yes ... although he is rather ... juvenile, one would say. Your girlfriend and her cousin - your best friend - you don't get suspicious at all?"  
"No, I don't," replied Remus loudly. Voldemort inclined his head.  
"Then so be it," he hissed, flicking his wand at Remus. "I could do it, you know," he mused, flittering about the room, "I could kill you. Or torture you into insanity. Or ... I could let you free. Under one condition."  
"And what condition might that be?" asked Remus politely, but with the grace of a man prepared to fight back. Voldemort smiled benignly.  
"You split up with Narcissa Black ... or I kill you." he said simply.  
"Why should my relatonship with Narcissa have anything to do with you?" Remus retorted.  
Voldemort's smile grew. "It is a question of uncertainties, dear friend. Self-indulgence in the wrong thing is her only philosophy. Besides - she is marrying Lucius Malfoy, whether she wants to or not. Bellatrix," he pointed at Narcissa's sister, whose heavy-lidded eyes flickered when Voldemort referred to her, "failed me in producing an heir-"  
"WHAT?" yelled Narcissa, "Bellatrix - you never told me you had a miscarriage, or actually DID it-"  
"Why would she?" said Voldemort dangerously, "You're never there to listen to her, are you?"  
Narcissa was silenced. There was no point in even making up an excuse.  
"Let James Potter go," ordered Voldemort, "but one thing, Potter ... I'll be back to reclaim my debt." James was released, and looking mystified at what Voldemort had told him, disapparated to his home immediatley. Voldemort approached Sirius, who's face was contorted with utter hate.  
"Sirius ... it is obvious, I'm afraid, what you're doing behind Remus's back ... oh, pity ..." Voldemort did not look like pity had ever met with his emotions; on the contrary he looked forboding, and rather fierce. "I am letting you go, Sirius - because you haven't angered me at all. Apart from cheating ..."  
"What?" snapped Sirius, his face full of anger.  
"You heard me," replied Voldemort silkily. "Release him; he can go."  
And with that, Sirius vanished.  
"Now - Remus. I'll be honest," he twirled his wand, "I don't like you. But you can go anyway. Disgusting half breed . . ." he smiled, pointing his wand at Remus's rope that was restraining him from moving, and Remus too, vanished.  
"Narcissa." Voldemort crouched so his face was aligned with Narcissa's, his breathing controlled. "Marry Lucius. Produce a son - who will carry on a task I will need doing in the near future. If you don't, I'll kill your three friends, but before that I shall torture them, and wipe their memories, before finally killing you. Is that what you want?"  
"No, no..." tears welled up in her eyes. "There has to be another way!"  
"There isn't," he said sharply, before gesturing to Bellatrix.  
"Untie her, and make sure she apparates to Malfoy Manor ... as far as I am concerned, any friendships with the marauders for Narcissa is finished."  
Narcissa was released, and as she disapparated, the last thing she heard was Voldemort and Bellatrix laughing...


	24. Chapter 24

When Narcissa came around, she was in a setting she did not recongize. Somebody had propped her up on a scarlet sofa, and she was uncannily reminded of Voldemort's eyes when they flashed with fury. Edging herself up, she saw pale blue eyes looking at her with staged concern. "You," she hissed, and backed away. He smiled steadily, his clouded eyes unblinking.  
"Yes ... do you like my house? We're getting married next week instead of the summer ... why wait?" he smiled, smoothing down his blonde hair with an arrogant, patronising motion. She didn't answer him. What had happened to the others? She tried to sit up but he pushed her down. "No, dearest," he continued, in the same flat tone of voice, "you hurt yourself quite badly when apparating ... hurt your arm. Do you want a drink?"  
"No," she replied sharply. "I mean, yes ..."  
He smiled. "Good girl. I've recently got another house elf - his name is Dobby. Bit of a fool, really, but there you go ... Dobby, come here."  
There was a loud _crack_, and the house elf called Dobby appeared, quivering. "Yes, Master?"  
"We want drinks - _now." _Dobby hesitated for a nano second. Lucius saw, and raised his wand to hurt the elf but Narcissa shielded him, her eyes blazing.  
"How dare you try and hurt a house elf-"  
"Get out of the way, girl, it deserves punishment-"  
"No-"  
"Get out of the way!" he flung her onto the carpet and she landed awkwardly, her arm clicking back into place. He raised his wand and pointed it at Dobby; who shrieked in horror and cowered as he was inflicted with pain. Narcissa was standing up now, her own wand pointed at Lucius, her chest heaving. "Dobby - go to the kitchen, please. I'll deal with Lucius." Dobby whimpered, before vanishing into thin air. Lucius was smirking at Narcissa.  
"So - what are you going to do to me, Narcissa?"  
"You hurt Dobby for no reason-"  
"Get a grip, woman!" he shouted, his cool, silk voice dissapearing into thin air. She smiled.  
"I'm not your darling, then?"  
His face fell in a strange sort of way as he sunk to the sofa, his face emotionless. "I - why don't you like me, Narcissa? I've got everything, money, I'm nice, I'll look after you and treat you well and get you anything you want."  
"I do like you," she lied, sitting next to him. "It's just difficult right now. You can't even begin to comphrend what I'm going through. Forced marriage, my friendships ended so abruptly. I never even got the chance to say goodbye. Oh, Lucius - can't you do anything to let Voldemort give in?" Lucius smiled upon her plea, and a stroke of sympathy crossed his face.  
"The Dark Lord and the term 'giving in' never goes well together." Lucius's smile was somewhat strained. "But ... did he permit any visiting?"

Narcissa thought, her breathing steadying. "He threatened James about repaying a debt, told Remus never to see me again ... Sirius. No. He didn't say anything about not seeing him." Lucius raised an eyebrow, but didn't speak, so Narcissa continued. "I - Sirius is my, cousin ..."  
"He's a blood traitor," said Lucius softly. Narcissa ignored this.  
"I want to see him."  
"No - it's dangerous." he told her firmly.  
"Please, Lucius, you said I could have_ anything_."

He sighed heavily. Narcissa was so persistant. He strode about the room, twirling his wand in his hands. He posed momentarily to glance out of the window, attempting to pursue a look of deep contemplation. He turned, his eyes glittering. "Don't you understand, silly girl? If The Dark Lord finds out ..." he supressed a shudder, "Oh, I don't know what would happen ... but if you really want to, Owl him. And that's all, for the time being."  
"Thanks, Lucius," she grinned. "I would of done it anyway." And with that, she stood up and left the room. Sitting at a desk in his vast-study, she selected a pot of ink and a twirly quill, before writing her letter on a roll of parchment, with the Malfoy Crest printed on it.

_Padfoot,  
I've been taken to Lucius Malfoy's residence. He's being okay at the moment, but ... I don't like this. I don't want any of it - but deep down I know wishing it to leave and wanting it to are two different things. I hope you're all okay. I'm so sorry, Padfoot. We should never of left Hogwarts, it's all my fault. I'm so sorry. I'm not allowed to correspond with Moony or Prongs in any way, shape or form - but I'm being slightly daring and am asking you to pass on my apologies and love. Don't blame any of this on yourself, though, because it was entirely my fault. I hope we can figure out a way to fix all of this. Not through charms or magic, but by general relization of matters. Oh god, I miss you all. So much. You'll never understand how much._

Love, Narcissa.

A tear splashed onto the letter she was composing, smudging the word "love" slightly. Sniffing, she rolled up the parchment and put it in a crisp white envelope, before tying it to a fluffy owl, which pecked her affectionatley before flying off. Sitting back down at the desk, she flicked her wand absent mindedly at the sleek looking radio, which burst into life. The end of a song she vaguely recongized was finishing as she tuned in, and a cool woman's voice took over. "... And that was _Perma Frost _with their Number One hit, _I've Got A Chill And I Think It's You. _I'm Olive Colens, and it's eight o'clock. The weather for tonight looks rather chilly, so I'd bundle up warm personally. Now, after that astounding weather report, I think I'll get to the news quickly - then to the competitions for this evening!" Narcissa rolled her eyes, but listened intently whilst gazing at the fire.  
"Several more attacks on Muggles in mid-London earlier on this evening, culprit unknown, fire at the old bridges just one hour ago ... and what's this? Excuse me for a moment ..." there was a pause, and then the presenter gasped in horror. Narcissa looked expectantly at the radio. "Another murder - Hydra Snow - employee at the Ministry of Magic, was found to be under the Imperius curse. As we all know, that is one of the unforgiveable curses, cast by ... well, you know. Upon having the curse broken, Hydra was trapped in insanity, and eventually hung herself. All these murders are rather odd, aren't they? My apologies about the news mainly consisting of death tolls ... my apologies indeed! Now, to the competition, could YOU win a Nimbus-"  
Narcissa zoned out after this upsetting and rather blunt news, and was only vaguely aware of someone entering the room a few moments later. Lucius sat rather gingerely next to her, looking a bit concerned. "Are you okay? I saw Fluffy - that's the owl, silly name I know - fly off with a letter. Uh," he cleared his throat, clearly not used to having to direct the whole conversation, "Do you want some dinner?"  
"Yeah, OK," said Narcissa quietly, standing up and heading to the door. Lucius followed, muttering, "I think we'll get a proper meal, not just slop or junk - how about..." she wasn't really paying any attention to him, but nodded whenever there was a pause. They entered the dining room, and he pulled a chair out for her out of manners. She stubbornly delibrated over sitting down, before taking her place. She drummed her fingers on the table in a rhythm, as if hoping to wind him up. Lucius sat opposite her, reading a copy of the Daily Prophet, ignoring her completely. After dinner had arrived fifteen minutes later, she was so tempted to eat. But something in her throat restrained her; choking her from the inside. She pushed the food around on her plate, taking forkfuls in her silver fork, but letting it clatter back down to the plate with a soft thud. She did, however, drain her glass of Firewhisky, but Lucius refused to give her a top up, claiming she would be wallowing in further self pity. He was trying to be nice, she knew that, but she just couldn't deal with it. "Where am I sleeping?" she asked abruptly, shattering the silence. He glanced at her, an eyebrow raised.  
"Well, it clearly won't be with me. Ah ... you can have the guest room. It's rather large - kingsize bed, fridge ... yes. Of you go then, if you're tired. Goodnight." And with that, he went back to his newspaper. She blinked.  
"Thanks, Lucius. Goodnight."  
After she'd got ready for bed, she wandered out onto the balcony and gazed at the moon. It was a full one. She imagined Remus transforming, along with Sirius and James as ritual. Would they miss her from were they were? She looked at the stars. "I miss you."

An hour or so away, Sirius had transformed back into himself, and glanced up at the twinkling stars. One appeared to wink at him. Stretching a little, he turned his head further towards the sky, and spoke. "I miss you." The heavens opened and rain fell down, big dark clouds hiding the moon. He hoped she missed them as much as they missed her.


	25. Chapter 25

Narcissa awoke that morning in a hot sweat. She groaned, dragging herself out of bed with self-force. As she did so, she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror - and wasn't suprised to see she had big, dark circles under her eyes, and a rather pale expression. Picking up a fluffy dressing gown that had been draped at the end of her bed, she put it on before padding out of her room. She descended down the winding staircase, and saw Lucius in the hall. He glanced at her, an eyebrow raised and a small smirk creeping onto his face. "You're a sight for sore eyes," he said in an arrogant manner. She ignored him, and wandered into the dining room, slumping on a velvet-covered chair. Everything about this place was so posh, so imposing. A loud _crack_ next to her indicated Dobby the house elf had arrived, whimpering slightly. "Mistress," he said in his squeaky voice, his eyes as round as tennis balls, "An owl has come for you, miss. Master Malfoy says, he says it's from your cousin, miss." Narcissa sat a little straighter, looking curiously at Dobby. "Thanks, Dobby ... where's Fluffy? The owl," she added, when Dobby looked confused. He clapped enthusastically and pointed at the windowsill, were Fluffy was sitting, looking quite composed as he ruffled his feathers. Pushing her chair back, Narcissa strode over to the owl and undid Sirius's reply quickly, before settling back in her chair and reading what he had written.

_Dear Cissy, _he had written in his untidy scrawl,

_I can't even begin to explain how wrong you are blaming yourself. It's not your fault, it's no-ones. It's just one of those things that goes wrong, and no one's at fault. NO-ONE. I miss you too, even though it's only been over a day. We're not bothering to pursue our education; what's the point? We've already got excellent careers ahead of us. Can you spot the sarcasam? I can. Last night I looked at the stars and, as soppy as it sounds, I thought of you.  
Can we meet? You and I. And pretty-boy-Lucius, if he insists._

_  
Love, Padfoot._

She scanned the letter quickly, and as she was wondering how to reply, Lucius entered, carrying food on a silver tray. "Not getting your servant to do it?" snapped Narcissa, quickly putting her letter in her pocket. He smirked, sitting down and buttering himself some toast. "Now now, Cissy ... you don't want me to think you're not only a grump in the mornings - but at the breakfast table, too? My my ..." She glared at him, feigning deafness as she sat opposite him. He placed the toast he had been buttering on her plate, but she just stared at it.  
"You know, you actually have to motivate yourself for it to be consumed," he pointed out stiffly.  
She was about to throw the plate at his head, but remembered Sirius's reply. So, calming herself, she smiled sweetly at him and picked up the toast, eating it delicatley. He smirked, pleased, and opened the Daily Prophet. "Huh ... another murder."  
"Is it Voldemort?" enquired Narcissa coyly, finishing her toast whole. He glanced at her.  
"Yeah ... he didn't like this unlucky one." He indicated to the newspaper article.  
"Ever noticed how the people Voldemort doesn't like end up dead?" she grabbed Lucius's toast and began to eat it at top speed, suprised at how hungry she was. She hadn't eaten properly for ages, and this food was pretty scrumptious. He chuckled, leaning forward in his seat and pressing his fingertips together, surveying her through cloudy eyes, his faint eyebrows raised as if in mockery. "Well - that's usually the case. And - people who aren't ... faithful to The Dark Lord also end up dead. But this man - Godfrey Pearl, had valuable information - refused to relay it and so ..." he mimed slitting at his throat, "Then it is only natural for him to end up dead."  
"What kind of stupid name is Godfrey Pearl," muttered Narcissa, taking a swig of Pumpkin Juice. Lucius looked suprised at her bluntness, a flicker of worry tracing his face for a brief moment.  
"Uh ... yeah. Anyway, what'd your letter say?" he asked, changing the subject swiftly.  
"Sirius just wants to meet up."  
"I see." he murmured, his grip around his clear goblet tightening.  
"Can I?" She glanced at him hopefully. His eyes narrowed, and a sense of forboding flooded through him.  
"Here? I don't want that ... thing, in my house. But you can go meet him in Diagon Alley, if you want."  
"Why the hell would I want to meet him there?" she snapped, kicking her chair back in agitation. Her anger only seemed to amuse Lucius, who chose his words very carefully, before saying them in a toneless voice, "I doubt The Dark Lord would suspect you meeting him there."  
Narcissa had to restrain herself from pouring Pumpkin Juice over his head. "Fine, _fine. _In that case, do you mind if I send him a response?"  
He merely grinned.

After Narcissa had sent her a reply to Sirius, she wandered around the manor house aimlessly, after showering and dressing. It was so boring here ... suddenly, something caught her eye. The newest type of Nimbus; she wasn't even sure if had been released yet. Trust Lucius ... she grabbed it and ran out into the vast fields which couldn't even be considered as an orchard or garden, and mounting the broom, she zoomed off around the sky. It felt exhilirating to have the wind in her hair and the warm sun on her face. She hovered down carefully, noticing Lucius watch her. His expression was anger with a dash of admiration.  
"That broom wasn't meant to be used ..." he said weakly. She shrugged at him, touching down perfectly.  
"Should of locked it up then, shouldn't you?" she snapped, clambering off the broom. "Can I have it?"  
"No," he snapped, snatching the broom off you and storming back into the manor. Narcissa sighed and wandered down by the lake, sitting at the edge. She was suddenly reminded of only a few weeks ago when she had been soaking up the sun with her best friends, wagging a few boring subjects to just hang out. This lake wasn't as magically inclined as the Hogwarts lake she was so used to. Granted, it did sparkle and shine, but the atmosphere was different - cold, almost. Shuddering, she bowed her head as she became lost in her memories.  
She must of fell asleep, because when she came around, someone was shaking her awake. She blinked a few times, letting everything come into focus. Lucius pulled her to her feet. "Narcissa - come inside. It's lunch time."  
Obediently, she followed him, her hands in her pockets. She hoped "it" wasn't obvious. Lucius gave her some sandwiches and a drink on a tray, before ushering her to her bedroom, as if understanding she needed some time on her own. He wasn't so bad ... but the majority of the time he was a git. She snorted to herself, munching a sandwich without further thought. In an attempt to de-bore herself, she turned on the radio, grabbed a book, and attempted to settle down.

A little later on, the window seemed to whisper to Narcissa. Then stones were thrown at it, causing her suspicions to arise. She heard Lucius open the front door, stifling a yawn. "You know, Black, most people tend to knock on a door before entering."  
"I didn't know your stupid security password," grumbled a voice she recongized. Narcissa crept out of her room, and glanced down from the balcony. She saw Sirius at the doorway, being blocked by Lucius.  
Lucius's lip curled. "I thought you were intelligent. The password is _pure-blood_, Black, something you're familar with, yet ah, how you befoul the family inheritance ..." Sirius had to contain his anger, and smiled falsely at Lucius. "So, where is my dear cousin?"  
"In her room," sniped Lucius, his eyes swimming with great dislike at Sirius, "Go see her, if you wish."  
"Wow, thank you, your highness," said Sirius sarcastically, bowing. With that, he pushed past Lucius and wandered up the winding staircase, his footsteps drawing closer and closer. Narcissa rushed back into her bedroom, but he saw her. "Hey! So you were watching that little dispute, then?"  
She grinned. "It's good to see you too, dear cousin."  
He took her hand and let her lead him to the bedroom she now occupied.  
"Huh, nice room," he said, flopping down on the bed. This was followed by an awkward pause, so clearing her throat, Narcissa sat down next to him. He looked at her, his blue eyes shining. "So ... how are you coping?"  
"Okay," she replied truthfully, "But I'd rather be with you ... all of you."  
He smiled faintly. "So this is the end."  
"Not completely."  
"Narcissa - be realistic. When you get ... married to him, we'll hardly ever see each other. This is why I said we can never truely be together." He looked alarmed as tears filled up in her eyes."Narcissa, don't cry ..."  
"I - I don't want any of this," she said, forcing her tears away."But I guess I have to accept it. We tried to run away from it all and look were it got us." She sniffed, and looked back at him directly. "Can we still, write ...?"  
"Yes, of course," he replied firmly. He stood up. "I better get going." She stood up too, and gave him a final hug, burying her head in his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close to him comfortingly. He kissed her forehead affectionatley. "Narcissa ... don't forget us."  
"Never," she whispered. And with a faint smile, and a look of concern in her cousin's eyes, he left.


	26. Chapter 26

**Lol ... this chapter is pretty sucky. I've been drifting in and out of Writers Block (or just general loss of muse, so yeah, you've been warned it's not good. And hell, this has got to be one of the shortest chapters I've wrote in a while. Ughhh :x I am soooo sorry D But I really want to get this chapter "out of the way" to continue with the rest of the chapters, which I have heaps of imagination for. It's just, I'm not too good at wedding stuff. Especially difficult weddings such as these... sigh. Ah well, enjoy.**

"You look like a whore."

Narcissa turned around, her eyes narrowed at the comment that was being thrown so distatefully towards her appearance. Lucius Malfoy was standing in the door way, a cocky expression on his aging face. He was looking her up and down with unmistakeable desire, but with a hint of lust. He had pointedly said this wedding dress looked good on her, but now it was 'too slutty.'

"So I can't wear it now?" she snapped, rubbing her cold bare arms.

He smiled. "Do you WANT to look like a whore in your wedding pictures? I will appriceate them, no doubt, but future predicament would judge differently, my dear ..."

She made a rude gesture at him and wriggled out of the dress, discarding it in a heap on the tiled floor. She instead selected a ruby-coloured one, which was complimentary to her figure. It was as vibrant as the colours of Gryffindor; and oh, how she wanted that to show in "future predicament!" The dress was perfect, there was no denying it. Lucius scowled, and scuttled off out of the room. It was going to be the smallest wedding in Malfoy/Black history - Narcissa wanted it private, Lucius wanted it public. Narcissa had won - thanks to a few hexes and threats. The wedding was going to take place in the grand hall - a quick ceremony, and bam, Merlin was your uncle. Lucius was yelling at her to hurry up, and glancing at her reflection one more time, she left the room in a flourish, dress twirling. The ceremony was indeed fast; she wondered how much Lucius had had to bribe for the wedding to be simple and meaningless.

"You take her?"

"I do."

"You take him?"

She paused. "I do."

"You are hereby married ... can I go now?" The little fat man conducting the service looked anxiously around the superior building, wondering why two rich people should want such a poor wedding. His eyes kept darting to Lucius's wand, that was shooting off red sparks occasionally.

"Yes," snarled Lucius, "Get out of our sight." The man gave a sort of yelp, before turning and running out of the door, without bothering to close it. Lucius sighed pointedly, turned his head to kiss Narcissa. She turned her head away, and let him kiss her cheek. That was all he would be allowed to do. Suddenly, the blinking image of a black dog appeared for a nano-second, and glanced unconvincingly at them, before dissapearing into the shadows. She knew it was Sirius ... it had to be.

"Weird dog," muttered Lucius, "Doesn't act like one."

"Shut up," Narcissa said, jabbing him in the chest with a polished finger. She made her way towards the door, and glanced out. No-one was there, waiting for her. "Perhaps it was a trigger of light," she heard Lucius say, but she knew better.

Suddenly, Luicus cried out in shock as a swirl of dark, clouding smoke appeared in the centre of the hall. Voldemort had arrived. He swept a glance over them, sneering. "I see the ceremony is over. Didn't go for a fancy one, I see, Lucius?"

"No, my lord." Lucius indicated to the lounge, "Shall we?"

"Yes," replied Voldemort crisply, "And, I am need of a liquid refreshment." He followed Lucius into the lounge, without glancing at Narcissa. He stopped at the doorway to the lounge, and looked at her, with those dead eyes. "Are you not joining us, Narcissa?"

She hesitated.

"I would prefer it if you did," he snapped. He seemed to realise the tone of his voice wasn't appriceated, and so he lowered it to his usual, sleek voice. "Come on, Narcissa, dear. We have things to discuss."

She followed him obliginly into the lounge, and hestitantly perched on the end of the couch by Lucius. Voldemort took a seat opposite, his eyes boring into hers. Lucius waved his wand murmuring the usual retrieval charms, and soon the three of them were drinking Firewhisky.

"So," begun Voldemort, drumming his long, snake like fingers on the couch, "You are both married now." They did not need to answer him, for he merely took another loud gulp of his drink, before continuing, as if playing for time. "You're too thin," he told Narcissa, a frown creasing inbetween his eyebrows. She raised an eyebrow. "I don't like a woman who's too thin ..." he trailed off, but continued to rap on the couch in a slow rythm.

"My lord ... what has desired you to visit?" Lucius enquired, his eyes glittering. Voldemort smiled.

"A request that you once agreed to, old friend."

"I ... what request would that be, my lord?"

"Narcissa," said Voldemort, now ignoring Lucius completely, "You are to produce an heir, remember? It must be a boy. I don't want a girl to carry on where I'll be leaving off, tempomarily, mind ... understood?"

Narcissa nodded, looking stunned. Voldemort's expression relaxed, and he stood, running a hand through his neat hair. Pulling his cloak around him more, he inclined his head to them both, before disappearing with a faint pop.


	27. Chapter 27

Two years passed.

Life for Narcissa had threatened to turn her into a snobby good for nothing pure-blood, but she refused to let herself sink that low. Diamonds glistened at her ears, neck, wrists and fingers; they made her feel somewhat more important. Of course - she only wore them when _Lucius_ requested her to, which was usually when they were at posh parties of Bellatrix's, or meeting up with Voldemort. Whenever she attended one of these parties or meetings, her dresses would be far too complimentary of her figure, causing the males to talk to her chest instead of her face. _Pervs_, she thought.  
On another note, she had constantly written to Sirius for two consecutive years, but he had never replied. Not once. It broke her heart to think he didn't care anymore; and had broken his promise of keeping in touch. She still wrote to him though. Long letters, short letters, general notes. As she was re-drafting her current prose for him, an owl appeared at her door. She did not recongize it, but it's features were somewhat striking; a short, squashed face with furious amber eyes that were staring curiously at her, it's beak, perfectly shaped, open only to carry the letter, it's brown feathers healthy looking. Cautiously, she dropped her quill and edged closer to the owl, as if wondering whether or not it was an illusion. It wasn't - it was a letter addressed to her in handwriting she hadn't seen in so long, and her heart skipped a beat. Carefully, but with trembling fingers, she undid the envelope, and a white letter fell into her hands.

_Narcissa, _the first difference she noted was the use of her full name, not his renewed nickname for her that was often used to mock Lucius,  
_Thanks for your last letter. Infact, thank you for all of them. I'm sorry I didn't reply, but I just couldn't. Too much is going on right now and I can't cope. It's been like this ever since Voldemort threatened us. Moony is having trouble getting a job, Prongs is kinda stressed out too - Lily wants a child but he does not. Not yet, anyway. I haven't seen Wormy in ages either, he's just dissapeared from our lives as if he was never there. Quite odd, really. And me? I'm on my own. I work, I sleep, I eat. But nothing seems real, it's like something that keeps skipping backwards and is broken. You know what I mean. How are things with Lucius and you? Mainly you, though. I don't care about him.  
Write back,  
Love Padfoot._

And that was it. Two long years had passed - and that was _it?_ She was tempted to throw his letter in the flames, but stopped herself just in time. He had replied - he'd actually replied! And he hinted that he still loved her. The day was glorious already. Grabbing some parchment and ink, she almost stabbed her wrist with her quill in her haste to reply to dear, dear Padfoot.

_Padfoot, you raving ... er, person!  
Oh my god - you .._

No. That was too silly. She tossed that to the flames, which burnt it to cinders, and relished it's appriceation by burping loudly.

_Padfoot,  
It's brilliant to hear from you at long last. I was beginning to give up hope of you ever responding, if I'm honest. I'm sorry about the way things have turned out for you all, and although you tell me not to I still feel responsible. Can't Moony get a job at the Ministry, or something? Please send my regards to him, Prongs and Lily. I'd say Wormy, but you haven't seen him, so what's the point? In answer to your question ... I'm alright. I think I might be ... pregnant. I'm a bit fatter. And that's saying something as I never used to put on weight. Or maybe it's these new Butter-roll things - they're lovely, you'd like them. Lucius has been alright with me. A bit distant, but who's suprised, eh. Can we meet sometime? I need to see you. I love you, and Moony, Prongs, Lily etc. Always.  
Love, Narcissa._

She dropped her quill in a flourish, and folded the letter carefully into a white envelope, before passing it to the brown owl. It hooted loudly and after recieving her response, flew off and out of her life. For good? She didn't know. She'd just have to keep wishing, wouldn't she? And with that, she grabbed a bottle of Firewhisky and began to drown in her sorrows.

--

Voldemort was sitting quite calmly in his office, scanning the latest information on the Ministry. Did they honestly think they could take him down? He supressed a dark bout of laughter, and pushed the notes aside. Standing up, he walked over to the mirror that hung between two single ebony bookcases. He looked into the mirror but did not see a reflection; he merely saw two scarlet eyes burning back at him. The Horcruxes ... he needed to check on them. One was quite safe, at Hogwarts; the others hidden completely. Apart from the little Badger ... he stepped over to the fireplace, and spoke into the emerald flames. "Bellatrix?"  
She appeared in a flourish. "Yes, Lord?" He smiled with amusement, she was so eager to please. It was good though, she'd do whatever he wanted her to without complaint - or questions. As long as he gave her a kiss or two, she'd be like a puppy who'd got it's biscuit. He stroked her face and complimented her, in which she giggled like a school girl. The sound of her gleeful laugh cut through him like a blade through fresh skin.  
_Get to the point, Tom,_ said a voice in his head. Yes, he would get to the point. "Bella, I have a request for you." Ah, she was going to do it already. Her eyes were shining and she looked overcome with emotion. "Anything, my lord, anything..."  
"I would like you to hide this Badger in your vault in Gringotts."  
She looked slightly abashed, confused, even. Her perfect eyebrows raised and her expression became questioning. "A Badger ..." she glanced at the one he was holding carefully in his hands. "Hufflepuffs, I am thinking?"  
_Clever girl, Bella, _he thought. "Yes," he chuckled, stroking her face, hoping his eyes were showing admiration. They clearly were, as she shivered with excitement as he stroked her face. "Can you do this for me . . . Bella?"  
"Of course, my lord," she gushed. But her expression fell for a moment. "Out of curiousity, my lord, why have me stash a monument of Hufflepuff?"  
His face darkened. "Is that really any of your business, Bellatrix?"  
"No," she replied in anguish, her eyes watering. "My lord, I crave your pardon . . ."  
The merest image of a smile flickered onto Voldemort's face. "My dear Bella," he purred, "So smart and inquisitive ... my dear girl, are you thinking of becoming an auror?"  
She laughed coldly. "My lord," scoffed she, flicking her dark hair off her pale face, "You know my allegiance has always lain with you - and not with the ministry."  
"Let us hope it will remain that way, my girl," he replied, pressing a kiss on her forehead and placing the badger in her hands, "Go." She nodded, and with that, disapparated. He sighed, running a hand through his dark hair as he made his way back to the desk. That girl was so needy. He liked her, yes, more than he should, perhaps. His Death Eaters were loyal - but she always seemed to creep back into his mind somehow. Smirking, he settled himself back in the Emerald chair, and glanced briefly at a documentation. There was just one more thing to do ...


	28. Chapter 28

His blue eyes scanned her response with anger and suprise combined. She was pregnant? With Lucius's son? "Ugh," said Sirius, throwing the letter aside with disgust. Still, he had expected it. He knew it would happen, but it was such a slippery business. He knew what Voldemort wanted Narcissa to do, in order to stay alive. And of course, Sirius wanted her to keep her alive - even if it meant taking things this far. Damn it! That slimey git Malfoy was going to pay. Grabbing his cloak, he wrapped it around him and left the house, banging the door behind him. He would go to James's. He could of apparated there, but actually walking there let him burn off some anger. He wrapped once, twice, three times on the wooden door. It swung open. A beautiful woman with vibrant red hair answered, and wrapped him in a hug immediatley. "Sirius," she said cheerfully, "James is in the lounge." Sirius smiled at her without bothering to speak, and made his way through to the lounge. At the sound of somebody else's footsteps, James looked up. "Hey Padfoot," he grinned. "Firewhisky?"  
"Sure," replied Sirius, "Why not?" Why not indeed.  
As James poured them both a generous measure, he glanced at his best friend with mild concern. "Anything wrong, Padfoot?" He handed him the glass of Firewhisky, which Sirius downed in a single gulp.  
"You could say that," replied Sirius darkly. "I have these feelings ..."  
"Stop right there," said James playfully. Sirius smiled benignly and fell silent, contemplating his options. An outsider of the matter would probably say to him to grow up and forget it all, but somehow, he just couldn't. She would probably be angry with him anyway, not replying for two years. Wow, why hadn't he replied? There'd been so much going on and it wouldn't of been appropiate.  
"So anyway," said James, cutting into Sirius's reverie, "Are you going to discuss, or not?"  
"It's Narcissa-"  
"_Narcissa_, eh? Oh ... I know. I know what you're going to say," his voice was taunting in a playful manner, "You like-like her."  
"How do you know?" Sirius looked suprised, and James laughed pleasantly."  
"I know everything," replied James nonchalantly. "It was kinda obvious though, mate. You know. _'Oh Narcissa, look at my stomach, yes I do work out, I'm so sexy . . .' _Methinks that might of gave it away, just slightly."  
Sirius punched James in the shoulder in a friendly manner. "Shut it."  
James grinned. "Sooorrry ... so. Problem? Oh yeah, I know. She's with Lucius, right? That can only mean one thing," he snapped his fingers mid thought, "Aha - she's pregnant?"  
"Possibly," replied Sirius, marvelled at James's intelligence.  
"Ahhh ... and so you're kinda jealous?"  
Sirius rolled his eyes at the bluntless of this statement, but nodded.

--

"No, oh flobberworms! No." She stared at the potion which would tell her whether she was pregnant or not; and she _was_. She'd just turned twenty ... she couldn't have a baby. It was unorthodox! Not so soon, anyway. Would it be as evil as Lucius? Muttering profanities, she marched downstairs looking for Lucius. "Lucius, where are you?" she shouted angrily, her voice echoing around the house. A cough silenced all. She turned, and saw Lord Voldemort standing in the hall, uninvited, with a smirk on his face.  
"Problem, girl? I assume you would not be shouting the odds if there wasn't." His tone was mocking, and his eyes seemed to laugh at her. She'd never really noticed before - they were so ... magnetic. She felt herself smiling coldly, power overseizing her.  
"There may be a problem, but is that really any of your concern, Voldemort?" Uh oh. She'd gone too far - his face contorted and he shot forward, grabbing her by the throat with one hand, his other hand on her shoulder.  
"Yes, dear girl, it is my business. I think you'll find anything and everything is to do with me - and speak like that again, girl," he threatened, his eyes narrowed with disgust, "I'll make sure the last thing you see is green light."  
She swallowed. "Yes ... lord." He released his grip and she staggered forward, choking a little for air. He regarded her as if she was pathetic, a smirk replacing that cold smile of his. "So what is the problem, Narcissa?"  
"I'm pregnant." She hadn't meant for it to come out so abruptly, but this didn't seem to restart his anger, infact, his smile grew wickedly. He stroked her face patronisingly.  
"Gracious, I'm pleased to hear it. Do you know the gender?"  
She shook her head, unable to restrain herself from smiling with pride. "No, but by the way it kicks me - I'm sure it's a boy." His smile grew, and he took her arm without speaking and led her to the kitchen. He forced, rather pushily, Dobby to make them all drinks. Dobby obliged, but shuddered and whimpered whenever Voldemort looked directly at the elf. "I don't like house elves much," he said coldly, taking a sip of his drink, "They annoy me so."  
Narcissa smiled. "Dobby's a good house elf, my lord."  
"So I see," muttered Voldemort, slamming his now empty glass onto the work top with such force that Narcissa flinched. "So, will the baby be born soon? I should imagine so, you look borderline obese. So, perhaps in another month or so, the child should be concieved?"  
She nodded. "Perhaps."   
His tones became sharp again. "I don't want any of these Mungo healers or Magi-Wives bothering you either. Your pregnancy, should you take this," he pushed a small tablet towards her in a tiny leather box, "will be virtually painless. And - don't question it," he added when he saw her open her mouth indiginantly, "take this now."  
Obediently, Narcissa swallowed the minute tablet. Voldemort's smile grew. "Good girl," he cooed. "And I'll send Lucius over to you - I forgot to mention he's been working over time on me." His grin was so ... cold. It frightened her.  
"Naturally, my lord ... farewell."  
"Yes, farewell."  
And with that, Voldemort vanished. Narcissa picked up a mirror on the worktop, and for the briefest moment, she saw her eyes flash scarlet.


	29. Chapter 29

**Riiight.. uh. I accidently said in the last chapter about Narcissa concieving the child - my dear friend Steph (Lady Clark of Books - do her challenge or get your chocolate confiscated for eternity) pointed out I'd made a scientifical mistake. Soooo, here is my correction: not concieved, BORN. Oh yeah.**

Voldemort had been right about one thing - it _was_ painless.

As she stared at the blonde-haired baby in her arms, she realised that she had not yet thought of a name for her new born child. The baby boy stared at her with shocking grey eyes, so like Lucius's, his white blonde hair thick around his head. His skin was very pale too. He looked almost sickly, but she knew he was not.  
A cloud of smoke appeared and caused her to cough; Lucius and Voldemort had arrived.  
"Painless?" queried Voldemort, glancing with apphrension at the child in her arms.  
"Quite," replied Narcissa, with the flicker of a smile. Lucius approached the bed and gazed with wonder at the child, fatherly pride over coming him. He stroked the baby's head gently - lovingly, even. His eyes gleamed with pride.  
"Lucius tells me you have not yet thought of a name for him," continued Voldemort thoughtfully, stepping away from the bed and helping himself to a drink. Narcissa frowned for a nano-second, before confirming this. Voldemort raised his crystal clear glass at them as if toasting. "I would like you to call him Draco - that was the name ... never mind. Call him Draco - _yes?_" The threat in his tone did not go un-noticed, but Narcissa was too tired to care.  
"Yes, my lord," said Lucius, answering for her. Voldemort smirked.  
"Good. I best be going ... things to do."  
"Will you be requiring assistance, my lord?" asked Lucius, looking hopefully. Voldemort laughed coldly - Lucius was so desperate to get on with Voldemort it was sickening at times. His lip curled, and Lucius was silenced. Voldemort approached him, eyes cold. "No, I do not require assistance," he told him harshly, his eyes burning, "And you should tend to your wife and son. I don't appriceate it when men abandon their children to continue life without them."  
Lucius looked startled. "My lord, I was not implying such a thing. I was merely wondering should you require assistance, then I will be more than happy to help you, my lord." Voldemort continued to frown, his handsome face flickering from anger to disgust. "Very well then," snapped Voldemort, before dissapearing in a cloud of smoke. Narcissa looked worried. "Lucius ... what did he mean by that? It was as if he was talking from past-"  
"I don't know what he was on about, Narcissa ... I really don't."  
Temper seized her - it was so obvious he was lying. "In that case ... LUCIUS MALFOY, IF YOU EVER GET ME PREGNANT AGAIN I WILL AVADA KEDABRA YOUR WHITE ARSE FROM HERE TO HELL!"  
Lucius looked startled. "Hormones," he muttered to the baby, "I feel for you."  
She grabbed a cushion and threw it with perfect aim at his head. It hit him - hard. "Serves you right," she said nastily.

** Let's fast forward a year - we're nearing the end of July now . :) **

Draco was one now - and he was so like his father, it was uncanny. Despite being a toddler, Narcissa had made sure his manners (to purebloods and family members, obviously) were in tact. "Mummy," he said, looking up at her as he played on the floor, experimenting with his toy replica train of the Hogwarts Express, "Where's Daddy?"  
"Call me Mother, Draco," corrected Narcissa, looking at her son with a smile. "Your father is at work."  
"Daddy's always working," said Draco crossly.  
"Call him father, Draco."  
"Why?" He was looking at her with a rather challenging expression. Ah, so much like his father. Persistant, awkward ... slightly annoying. Devious, even. Last week he had been chasing Dobby around the house and had locked him in a broom cupboard, and cried when Dobby apparated out.  
"Because I told you so, that's why!"  
He just grinned at her and started laughing. "Mummy silly." She sighed, that child took no notice whatsoever. The doorbell sounded, and Dobby hustled off to answer it. Narcissa sighed and stretched out on the couch - she was so tired nowadays. It'd help if Lucius was there, but no, he was always working overtime with Voldemort. And their latest plan . . . she hadn't heard from Sirius in a while. Last time was a month ago. His responses came in dribs and drabs, never constant or immediate. She sighed. At least he was replying, now.  
She heard her elf squeak, and cast a curious look over to the door. Dobby appeared, looking fearful. "Miss? I have some news from Lucius, miss..."


	30. Chapter 30

**I've decided to put a little quote at the beginning of every chapter from now on - as this is a landmark for chapter thirty.. w00t!! I'll try write a long chapter for you guys for a treat.  
**_"__If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals." - Sirius Black, Goblet of Fire_

Narcissa looked at Dobby with wonder. "Send him in, Dobby." But before the house elf could move, Lucius strode in, his pale-blonde hair falling over his face. His stony grey eyes looked cold, and he narrowed them. "I did not realise I needed permission to enter my own lounge," he said crispsly, seating himself down on the armchair nearest the fire. Draco stared at him fearfully.  
"Draco, go play with Dobby or something," snapped Lucius, not taking his eyes off Narcissa. Draco obeyed, picking up his toy train and skittering out of the room to follow the misfortunate elf, who could be heard running up some stairs in rapid speed. Lucius looked somewhat distracted - his eyes kept skittering across the room, unable to look her in the eyes anymore.  
"Lucius," her voice was firm but gentle, "What's the urgency?"  
"I thought," he replied, his tone abrupt, "That you would like to know some information before I returned to work. You're familiar with Wormtail?"  
"Yes," replied Narcissa, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. Lucius continued to look uneasy, shifty even. He cleared his throat as if playing for unnecessary time, before relaying the information she needed to hear. His expression was somewhat cautious; as if he was suspecting Lord Voldemort himself would intrude and punish him for warning her. He looked at his hands rather than her sparkling eyes; his hands were somewhat more of a comfort zone then her awaiting embrace. "Wormtail has become somewhat unfaithful, Narcissa," begun Lucius, pressing his hands together before cracking his knuckles which sent tension down her spine. She loathed it when he did that. "He has been feeding information to the Dark Lord as to were Lily and James Potter may be."  
Narcissa's hand turned into a fist; whatever colour she had in her face had drained. "Why would he do that?" she said hoarsely. Lucius shrugged in contempt, and he reminded her so much of Sirius for a moment, just by shrugging carelessly. Her eyes clouded, and she cocked her head to one side and waited for him to continue intently. "How should I know, Narissa? As far as I am concerned, it's a friendship that has lost it's touch. And in saying so, what I'm trying to get across is ... oh, Narcissa. Warn Sirius. Remember, Voldemort still has a debt to reclaim."  
"Why are you helping me?" she asked suspiciously, standing up and smoothing out the creases in her dress. "You dislike the lot, don't you?"  
Lucius looked aghast.  
"Yes, I do. But they are your best friends, and he is your cousin. It's only ... right," he replied weakly, running his hands through his hair in mild agitation. She gave him a quick hug. "Lucius, thank you."   
He smiled wearily. "Pleasure, my dear. And now, I must go to work." He dissapparated, and Narcissa sighed, grabbing some parchment and ink from the side table, which whistled at her. It appeared all of their furnishings whistled or burped, or had some magical enchanment placed upon them. Narcissa ignored the noises, and quickly drafted out a letter to Sirius. It was very simple. _'Padfoot - we need to meet, NOW. Come to my house. Love Cissy.' _It seemed simple, and so she handed it to Fluffy the owl, who hooted happily at being given a job to do, and flew out of the window. Draco scuttled back into the room with Dobby, who looked a bit weary of the young child. Draco dropped his train onto the carpet with a bang, but Narcissa didn't reprimand him. There was no point; there was too much on her mind right now for her to berate a child who'd merely dropped a toy. He narrowed his pale eyebrows at his mother, and scowled. "I want pancakes, mummy."  
"Fine," she sighed wearily, now looking directly at Dobby. "Dobby, could you oblige?" The house elf, who was mysteriously covered in flour nodded weakly, before dissapearing into thin air. She needed Sirius, and she needed him _now_. She hadn't told anybody about the migraines, or the nightmares. For the first time in her life, she wished she had paid attention in Divination. Perhaps this meant something. Suddenly, a wave of inspiration grabbed her, and she ran off into the kitchen, dress swirling. She made the fastest cup tea in a lifetime; and drank it quickly, ignoring the fact her lips were burnt. She gazed at the tealeaves, and it was a clear sign. Narcissa was supersticious, but was this really coincidental?  
Someone cleared their throat and she started; dropping the cup to the ground with a fantastic smash. The tealeaves, which had shown the grim, seeped into the green kitchen floor tiles quickly, along with a few remaining droplets of tea. She looked up at him through framed eyelashes and a smile crept onto her face. She couldn't contain herself - it had been months since they had last met properly. "Sirius!" she flung her arms around him and buried her head against his neck. He stroked her hair with quick but soft brushes. "It seemed important," he murmured. He let go of her, and his blue eyes flashed with concern. She looked thinner, and her eyes seemed so ... cold. Different. He blamed Lucius. "Cmon," he coaxed, "let's go to the lounge and you can tell me all about-"  
"Mother, I want more pancakes!" the shrill voice of Draco could not be ignored as he strode into the kitchen, a surly expression on his usually cute face. He stared at Sirius, then grinned. "You're Sirius - aren't you?"  
"I, uh ... yeah. Yeah I am," said Sirius, his usual swagger returning as he considered her child. Draco looked like Narcissa alot, but had Lucius's mannerisims - which meant Draco was probably going to be a brat.  
"Father dislikes you," said Draco thoughtfully, unaware of the fact he had pancake mixture all around his face. "I don't like you either. Mother, what's Sirius doing here?"  
Narcissa was disgusted. "Apologise at once Draco - you do not treat your family like scum."  
Draco scuffed his shoes and tried to look sorry for himself. "Sorry, Mr.Sirius,"  
"That's okay," said Sirius, lowering his voice so only Draco could hear, "but next time, I'll hex you." Draco looked terrified and ran off out of the room, tripping as he went. Sirius was mildly satisified, but Narcissa was frowning. "Sirius, you shouldn't of-"  
"Shush, Cissy," he sighed, helping himself to Firewhisky. "Want some?"  
"Okay. But take them through to the ... outside," she replied hurriedly, sweeping off to open the doors leading out to acres of wonderous green. Sirius followed quietly, carrying the clear glasses with swirling orange liquid. He handed one to her and their fingers brushed; just. Her insides felt as if they'd been corrupted by butterflies but for some reason she felt relaxed at the same time, as if her brain was co-operating and telling her to calm. Calm ...

"So ... what did you ask me here for?" Sirius had finished his drink and was now staring with the same intensity as he had done a few years ago. Narcissa missed it, often. She tried to smile but couldn't, and decided the only way to tell him was the quickest. "Wormtail isn't who you think he is," she said quietly. "Sirius, you will want to know this."  
Ah. He looked alert now, his eyes wide open as he surveyed her with curiousity. He looked at her enquiringly, and she swallowed. "He's been passing information to Lord Voldemort regarding Lily and James." When Sirius displayed no emotion, she felt she should continue. "As in, where they are currently, what their motives are as such, who they are corresponding with. Sirius ... he's a spy. He's not your friend."  
"How do you know this?" he said finally, cracking his knuckles as he averted her eyeline.  
"Voldemort told Lucius, and Lucius felt it was right to tell me." Sirius didn't reply. "I think it was quite noble of him to relay this information ... it could put us all, you included, in danger."  
Sirius glowered at this sudden revelation of truth inspired by what had appeared at first to be a trivial visit. "Are you quite sure? Are you positive this isn't a set up, dear cousin?"  
She smiled faintly. "Yes, Padfoot."  
He stood up. "I should probably get going, then . . ."  
Narcissa clambered to her feet ungracefully. "Can't you stay for a bit longer? It's been forever, Sirius. Don't go."  
Sirius sighed deeply and looked into her eyes. "You've got to have some hope in me, Narcissa." Her eyes flickered with sudden anger. She didn't appriceate mind games. She stepped very close to him so their bodies were touching, and whispered in his ear with a quote she loved. "To hope is to look forward with desire; and usually with a measure of confidence in the likelihood of gaining what is desire, my dear cousin."  
"Merlins beard," he said, "since when did you get so knowledgeable?" He could see how much her eyes sparkled now they were aligned perfectly.  
"Always have been 'knowledgeable' dear cousin," she grinned, and gave him a slight push in the chest. "Go sort out your business, then."  
"What? Oh, yeah, okay ..." He squeezed her hand before dissapearing into thin air. She sighed, and went inside, wondering if Dobby felt like making another round of pancakes just for her, because a sudden need for food had begun to gurgle in her stomach.  
She walked into the house to find Dobby playing with her son. "You are the Hogwarts driver," he was telling Dobby clearly, "and I am the big bad wizard, and I shall blow up this train!"  
"I don't think that's an appropiate game, Draco," scolded Narcissa, standing over the two of them with her hands on hips. Draco looked at her and grinned toothily.  
"Where that man go, Mummy?"  
"Mother, Draco," she corrected, "and Sirius left."  
"Good, he's got odd hair like daddy." Draco observed crisply, taking another bite of pancake and making it crumble all over him. He was such a messy eater, like his father.  
Narcissa couldn't even be bothered to correct him, she just laughed, but inside she was shaking with worry. She just hoped Sirius wouldn't do anything reckless or dangerous; but he was just that sort of person. He always _had_ been - why would that change now? Why did Voldemort have a problem with James anyway? She didn't have any idea. She wanted to speak to James but it was far too dangerous. He'd be slaughtered instantly if he comminucated with her. Maybe she could owl Remus ... no, no she couldn't. God damn it, god bloody damn it.  
"I need to go shopping," Narcissa told Dobby and Draco, "Dobby, could you mind Draco?" The house elf looked terrified but nodded in agreement. Smiling, she approached her fireplace and grabbing some floo powder, she said clearly, "Diagon Alley!"  
Of course, shopping was the only remedy for times like these. She was making her way to the Quidditch shop to look at the new broomsticks in mild interest, when a dark haired woman stepped out of the shop in a black corset, with a black shawl covering her other-wise bare arms. "Narcissa," she said smugly, "how nice to see you."  
"Bellatrix," simpered Narcissa fakely, "how are you?" Bellatrix smirked and indicated several shopping bags. Rodolphus emerged a moment later, carrying a brand new type of Nimbus. He flashed his gleaming white teeth at Narcissa in which was meant to be a smile. She shuddered slightly, but forced her lips into a smile. "Rodolphus," she acknowleged him unwillingly.  
"Narcissa," he smirked, "have you seen Severus, oh ... never mind ..."  
Severus Snape appeared with bloodshot eyes and black hair stuck to his head. It looked like he hadn't sleeped in months. His face was gaunt with a slight yellow tinge, but other than that he was deathly pale. His lips forced themselves to smile. "Narcissa," he greeted weakly, his voice barely above a whisper.  
"Severus, are you alright?" Narcissa was overcome with sympathay for her old friend, who looked like he was going to faint any moment. He such his head fiercely and learnt forward to whisper in her ear. "Soon, it will be soon, but he won't listen to me, he won't stop it."  
"Ignore Sev, Narcissa," interjected Rodolphus rudely, "he's gone a bit crackers recently." Bellatrix giggled and punched his arm playfully, and he wrapped a hand around her skinny waist. Narcissa ignored them.  
"Severus - is it to do with Lil-"  
He looked aghast as she mentioned Lily, and tears filled his eyes, and he stalked off, looking ludicriously bat like. Rodolphus rolled his eyes and tutted at Narcissa, looking cross. "Don't mention Lily Potter," he hissed, "he just starts crying."  
"What have you done to James and her?" snapped Narcissa, anger seizing her once more.  
"Don't talk to Rod like that!" snapped Bellatrix, glaring at her sister. Narcissa ignored her, and continued to glare at Rodolphus, who was smirking.  
"Not me doing anything as much, Narcissa dear ... but the dark lord himself. Come on, Bellatrix, let's go." Bellatrix walked off with Rodolphus in a huff, muttering under her breath about her sister. Narcissa felt rather angry - what had upset Severus so? Lily had done something, perhaps? She thought back to her school days as she gazed in the shop window, when it hit her.  
Severus Snape had loved Lily Evans - and she was going to die - and there was nothing anyone could do about it ... or was there?


	31. Chapter 31

**Let us go forward a few more months ... sorry. I know I keep skipping XD This chapter was kind of hard to write -- Ah well, enjoy. :)**_  
"Yes, but the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters," - Sirius Black  
_

Halloween approached quickly - the air had become alot colder for starters, with chilling winds at no extra cost. The green leaves had long turned orange and brown, flowers and grass dying as post winter frost skittered across the stems and blades. With the nights going darker earlier than usual, Narcissa felt it was necessary to take extra precaution - this being not going out at all in the dark hours. But of course, Draco wanted to participiate within the muggle event of trick 'n' treating. "I want to go!" he had whined, pursing his lips in what he hoped to be a winning plead.  
"Fine," Narcissa relented unhappily, "Your father can take you."  
Only, after this had all been arranged, Lucius backed out at the last minute, with any form of explanation. She presumed it was work and this angered her - could he not go running to Voldemort for just one night? Just one?

Probably not.  
So they sat at home playing games to pass the time, and Draco was content with alot of candy, so he now had to no reason to whine or plague Narcissa with his hammy fists to take her out. She was reclining in her arm chair, reading the daily prophet without real interest, when Lucius returned around ten o'clock. She looked around for Draco in sudden panic, as if suspecting he had been kidnapped, but no, he was snoozing on a mountain of candy. He had chocolate all around his mouth. He looked quite cute, but Lucius didn't seem to think so, his scowl pointed this out quite clearly. "Narcissa ..." his face was un-naturally pale in the light from the fire-powered lamps; his eyes seemed quite frightened too. What had happened?  
"What's happened, Lucius?" she leant forward and took his hand in sympathay, but he snatched it away, and strode over to stand by the fireplace, narrowly missing tripping over their sleeping child. "The Dark Lord has fallen."  
Narcissa was shocked to the marrow - if he was so incredibly powerful, how on earth had he died? Lucius seemed to read her mind, and answered her unasked question with a bitter tone. "His killing spell backfired."  
"Who ... who was he trying to kill?" she asked weakly, dread plummeting into her stomach.  
"James and Lily Potter."  
"And - did he succeed?"  
He paused, and looked at her directly. "Yes."  
"No ... no." She sunk further into her armchair and lost control; Lucius had never seen Narcissa like this before. "But if he killed them ... how did it backfire?"  
Lucius' jaw muscles tightened, as if finding it hard to reply. "He could not kill the boy. I don't know what happened; but the boy survived the killing curse."  
Narcissa had tears pouring down her pale complexion now, her blonde hair matting to her face. "My god ... my _god_ ..."  
"But that's beside the point," said Lucius coldly, "I may be sentenced to eternal imprisonment in Azkaban; along with your dear sister ..." The news suddenly brought her back to her senses - at least, for a moment. If the Death Eaters were going to be convincted, then that meant that Rodolphus was going to go to Azkaban too, along with the rest of the Death Eaters. Questions swarmed around her head like angry wasps - how did Voldemort know were Lily and James were? Why did he want them dead? Why why _"WHY?" _she shrieked hysterically, not caring were her so called 'allegiances' stood anymore. She let herself go and began to punch Lucius in the chest as if it were all his fault.  
"Narcissa, calm yourself-"  
"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, TWO OF MY BEST FRIENDS HAVE JUST BEEN MURDERED AND ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOURSELF!"  
Lucius paled, "Please, Cissy-"  
"SHUT UP!" she roared, "JUST SHUT UP! AND IF YOU GO TO AZKABAN - LIE OR SOMETHING! DON'T YOU DARE GET YOURSELF PUT AWAY, WHAT WILL IT DO TO DRACO AND HIS FUTURE? WHAT ABOUT ME? YOU STUPID, STUPID MAN!"  
The door flew open and Sirius Black emerged, his face mingled with tears and sweat. His dark hair was messier than ever. His eyes kept darting behind him, and he ran towards her. "Narcissa, I swear, it wasn't me-" he grabbed her warm hands and placed his icy cold ones against hers. And in the haste of it all, he ran to her and kissed: it was unreal. More aurors entered and grabbed Sirius, pulling him away. "It wasn't me - get your hands off me! How dare you!"  
"Let him go!" yelled Narcissa, forgetting she'd just been kissed by her cousin in the middle of a raging argument; "He's innocent!"  
One of the aurors raised a sarcastic eyebrow at her and smirked. "You do know it's thanks to your cousin Lily and James are dead? Secret Keeper aswell ... tut tut."  
Narcissa was as white as a ghost now; the other aurors paused in dragging Sirius away. "Is that true?" she whimpered.  
"I made Wormtail secret keeper," he whispered hoarsley, his eyes brimming with tears, "Remember? And Lucius was telling you Wormy had become somewhat unfai- AHHH!"  
One of the aurors had hit him with a stunning spell; "Shut up you traitor - Azkaban awaits, Mr. Black - I'm sure the dementors will be very happy to see you."  
"But I'm innocent - I, I am!"  
They did not listen to his pleads, but instead held onto him tightly to prevent any possible escape - and then dissapeared into thin air. With the shock of everything piling into one, Narcissa fainted.

"Mother? Wake up!" she stirred as small podgy hands pulled at her cheeks and hair. She opened her eyes and blinked several times as her surroundings came into focus. Draco's enquiring face was gazing at her. He cared about her! How sweet. "Mummy, you're lying on all my candy!" And with that, he began to cry loudly. She'd squashed his bloody chocolate frogs. She pulled herself to her feet, and Draco retrieved his food, and stroked their packaging before pulling it off viciously and shoving it all in his mouth. She smiled faintly; Remus would of been like that had she accidently squashed _his _chocolate frogs. Narcissa somehow doubted he'd burst into tears though. She looked at the doorway and saw two more aurors standing there, questioning Lucius with a grave expression.  
"Are you aware, Mr. Malfoy, that He Who Must Not Be Named has died?"  
"He has?" Lucius portrayed a look of innocence, but the man snorted disbelivingly, and prodded Lucius in the chest with his ebony made wand with so much force that tiny red sparks flew out. "But weren't you working under his command?"  
"I'm afraid my mind has many blank spaces ... goodness, goodness ..."  
Narcissa supressed a dark laugh. Lucius was a dreadful actor - but the aurors now seemed to be swallowing all this Cod Swallop! The female auror looked sympathetically at Lucius and stroked his arm. "I think he's been under the imperius curse," she muttered to her partner, who seemed to half believe her. "Hm ... I don't know Alex. In the meanwhile Mr. Malfoy, you shall await trial in azkaban - I hope you haven't forgotten were that is?"

Lucius was shunned into silence, and smirking, the aurors marched him off and out, not paying an ounce of attention to Narcissa or Draco. Silence filled the empty spaces, until someone burped.  
"Sorry," said Draco, grinning cheekily. Narcissa cracked her knuckles and spoke to her child. "Draco - stay here. You can eat as much food as you want. I'll be in my study ... move or I shall hex you."  
He shivered. "You sound like S-Sirius," he stuttered, looking terrified.  
Indeed she did. She shook her head and ran off out of the room and to her study, were she grabbed some parchment with such force that it almost ripped in half. She scribbled a note to Remus - restrictions to their friendship were long finished now.

_Remus, _she scribbled frantically, ink splodging all over the place,  
_James and Lily have been murdered. I don't know if you know this. Voldemort has fallen. Sirius is going to Azkaban, and so are the rest of the Death Eaters - and Lucius. Harry survived the killing curse.  
Don't come here. It's too dangerous. Just owl back. Please.  
Narcissa._

Now, where was that bloody owl? Ah - there it was. "Fluffy!" she coaxed in a false voice "come get the letter!" The Owl hooted indignantly and flared it's eyes at her crossly - he did not mind delivering letters, but this late? He'd just been sleeping! He swooped down to her and pecked her hard on her arm, before retrieving the letter and flying out of the window.  
And now ... and now to wait.

But fortunatley, she didn't have to wait long. Remus apparated in her study in the pit of silence, that she started violently and fell off her chair. "Remus!" she scolded, sitting on the floor in a ton of papers and books, "you - you shouldn't of come here-"  
A flicker of a smile crossed his face as he watched her on the floor. "Want a, er, hand up?" he couldn't remove his amusement as he offered a hand to her ink-covered one. She took it begrudingly and he pulled her to her feet. "So ..." she begun, but he interrupted her as he burst into tears. Christ, she hated it when people cried, she was awful in situations like these. "James can't be d-dead!" he stuttered, flinging his arms around her and burying his face into her shoulder, "He's too strong! He is not dead! I won't believe it - I won't!" She hugged him soothingly but he pulled away, and for the first time in her life she saw the shadow of the wolf flit across his face. "So - Voldemort is dead?" he said harshly, his voice now free of sobs. She cocked her head to one side for a moment but then nodded mutely. He grinned evilily. "Good. And the Death Eaters are-"  
"Being rounded up to Azkaban," she finished quietly.  
His smile grew. The news of everyone going to eternal improsement seemed to give him happiness. "Good! And that includes ..."  
"Lucius, yeah." She narrowed her eyes at his renewed joy, and as she had presumed, it faltered. Typical Remus - he was sentimental in his own ways. Although, Lucius was working against the good witching and wizard establishment, which she personally disliked (as would any non-death-eater-person, she had grown close to Lucius now; not in the romantic perspective, but the friend one. And when she was anyones friend, she would remain loyal, always.  
"Will he get out of it?"  
"I think so," she said loftily, "I think he's confused as to were his loyalties lie."  
"Well I would of assumed that would of been obvious, Narcissa, a man's loyalties lie with his wife and family, not his job. Maybe he'll come to realise that now. It'll be okay. Er - do you want a cup of tea?"   
She nodded, and he walked with her to the kitchen, and made the tea in silence. He handed her a scarlet mug and she sipped it delicatley. It was perfect, he always made their cups of tea just right. That was one of the things she had liked about him - his tea making abilities! She snorted into her tea and he looked bemused, so she composed herself. "I can't believe it, Remus, I ... wait a moment," she wrapped both hands around the mug, sending instant warmness through her body, "Where will the boy go?"  
"To his only living relatives - his sister's aunt."  
"Not Petunia!" said Narcissa with clear disgust, "she's awful!"  
"They're the only family he's got," said Remus shortly, placing his now empty mug on the worktop. "I better get going ... I'll come see you later tomorrow. Please don't do anything wreckless. Goodnight."  
He dissapeared, and left Narcissa quite alone in the now empty kitchen, Lucius' absence roaring at her. Silence was so freaking loud.


	32. Chapter 32

**You know what? I really don't like writing depressing chapters! Ah well ... enjoy. .**

_"Rita stared at her. So did Harry. Luna, on the other hand, sang "Weasley is our King" dreamily under her breath and stirred her drink with a cocktail onion on a stick."_ - _Order of the Phoenix_

Narcissa arrived at the funeral grounds dressed in black, accompanied by Remus. Draco was being looked after by a relative, but he was of little importance to her at the present time. Remus found them both seats in the middle with a respectable view. He burbled on, trying to relax the atmosphere, but it was all in vain. She stared at the large, black coffins at the front of the depressed ceremony. Everyone appeared to be crying or holding back tears, all reunited in their grief for the passing of Lily and James Potter. Pillars situated either side of the two black coffins and the stand for were the conductor would be, intwined with climbing ivy and roses. A powerful aroma of flowers overcame her and she felt quite sick. She never had liked Roses. Lilies were her favourite ... oh no. Even the name of classic, beautiful flowers brought tears to her eyes.  
"Are you alright, Narcissa?" asked an old but powerful voice somewere in front of her.  
She wiped her eyes frantically, before retorting, "Does it look like it?" There was a short silence, and she remembered her manners. "I'm sorry-" she began to apologize, but was cut off by the pleasant voice.  
"Not at all, my dear," chuckled the voice, and it was only when she looked up she recongized Albus Dumbledore smiling waverly at her. The twinkle from his blue eyes had dissapeared, and an anger she had never seen before on his face replaced it. Another voice cut through Dumbledore's harshly. "You've got a nerve, showing your face here."  
Narcissa glanced up to see the aging face of Bathilda Bagshot glaring at her with redemption. "What's that supposed to mean?" she said, completely nonplussed.  
"Your husband is a death eater," said Bathilda with a cold overtone to her usually sickly-sweet voice, "and so is your sister!"  
"That doesn't mean I am, Bathilda," snapped Narcissa, her eyes blaring with new found dislike for a woman she had once respected. Dumbledore intervened by placing a hand on the accusor's shoulder, and said quite pleasantly, "Not now, Bathilda, respects ought to be shown to whomever has turned up in the honour of James and Lily."  
"I don't care," shrieked Bathilda shrilly, causing people to turn and stare at her and Narcissa with a gaining interest, "I don't care if all of your Death Eater pals-"  
There was a few shrieks at this remark. Bathilda looked proud at this and continued: "Are going to get revenge . . ."  
"They've been confined to what appears to be an eternity of imprisoment," said Narcissa apphrensively, "So I doubt they will be 'seeking revenge' any time soon." Bathilda snorted disbelievingly but turned away, scowling. Remus looked with concern at Narcissa but she pretended not to notice; and instead concentrated on the view infront of until it became a bleary view. Suddenly, some drums begun to play as the ceremony begun. Heads turned as the conductor of the ceremony walked up in the middle of the aisle with watery eyes.  
"Deary beloved, we are gathered here today for the funeral of Lily and James Potter ..." Narcissa drifted off as the conductor began to relay a very long speech about how they did not deserve to die. Narcissa wasn't the only one who had begun to cry. Remus was holding her hand so tightly it began to hurt but she didn't bother pulling away: there was no point. After the long ceremony, people began to leave, but some remained to pay final, personal contributions to her best friends. She and Remus made her way to the front by the coffins. Remus delicatley stroked James' coffin and looked as if he was about to say something, but became too choked up and turned away. Narcissa, however, managed to speak a few words. "I'll miss you. We'll keep an eye on Harry ... don't worry." That was all she managed to say before bursting into tears. Remus pulled her away from the coffins with suprising force, and he walked with her out of the ceremony grounds.  
"Remus? Remus!" His head turned a fraction at the voice that was calling him, and he saw it was Molly Weasley, who was wearing a very tearful expression on her face. "I'm so sorry, Remus, he was your best friend, and-"  
"Not now, Molly ..." he said, raising a hand to silence her. She silenced, and looked at him sorrowfully, before placing a hand on his arm in sympathay. He forced a smile before turning away with Narcissa. They walked for some time in silence, down winding empty streets she barely knew. "Do you want to get a cup of tea or something?" questioned Remus hopefully, before adding, "And some Chocolate ..."  
"I don't feel up to consuming anything right now, to be honest Moony," she said in a false tone of voice. He raised an eyebrow but nodded, and gave her a quick hug. "If you ever need me, just owl me, okay?"  
She nodded, and the hug ended when he disapparated. She hated it when people did that whilst hugging her.

She spent a long time that day staring into space silently. She had many, many thoughts running around her mind, along with questions that would remain unanswered and silly theories. Was _that_ why Severus had been weird with her that day in Diagon Alley - because he knew of Lily's future fate and couldn't do anything about it? And Sirius, in azkaban, forever until death ... the thought was too horrible. He was innocent, but he was being plagued for a crime he had not committed, along with Lucius. Although, knowing Lucius, he'd bribe the Minister with a nice donation to get his sorry arse saved. Maybe he could get Sirius out too ... she'd have to see. But even that seemed impossible. She sighed again. But, all the other Death Eater's _weren't_ guilty at all, even though they were totally to blame. Bellatrix had been carted off to Azkaban laughing manically, swearing she was faithful most to The Dark Lord as she was serving her time just for him. Narcissa supressed a laugh. Deranged Bellatrix. Yes, that was the perfect describing word for her. Deranged. Manic. Insane ...  
"Mother?"  
Draco's voice interupted her disturbing reverie of creating insulting describing words for her sister, and she snapped her eyes open so violently that Draco started. "Yes, Draco?"  
"When is father returning?" his little face was now an angry scowl as he spoke of Lucius. Narcissa wiped her suddenly damp eyes as he questioned her. She'd never cried over Lucius before, never. James would of shrewdly put it down to hormones, as he often did if she was in a temper. She begun to laugh, and Draco looked a bit put out. His mother was so odd at times.  
"I ... I don't know Draco," she said, tears threatening to spill again. "Soon, I hope."  
"OK. In that case ... can I have pancakes?"  
"Knock yourself out," she said wearily, but she sat up suddenly as Draco proceeded to grab a heavy book. "Draco, I was just kidding-" Too late. Draco had whacked himself in the head with a heavy book, and a rather stupid expression crossed his face as he crumpled to the floor.  
"Damn it!" she cursed angrily, lifting her son up to place him on the sofa. He wriggled and fell out of her arms like a fish that didn't want to be caught, and landed on the floor. His fall was cushioned by the amount of candy that still remained there, and he giggled stupidly. "Want pancakes me ..."  
She rolled her eyes. "Dobby? Can you get some pancakes for Draco, please?"  
"Yes mistress," said a timid voice from behind the door, before leaving with a loud _crack._

Albus Dumbledore had saved Severus Snape from going to Azkaban - and possibly being sentenced to eternal imprisonment. They both entered his office in silence, and Dumbledore sat at his desk, indicating with a swift hand motion that Snape should sit opposite him. He watched as the broken man sat slowly, gripping the sides of the chair as if worried he may fall. His head was bowed, his black hair covering his eyes. Dumbledore was surveying him with a cold expression that gave away no emotion. "You loved her, didn't you Severus?"  
"Yes, headmaster." Snape's voice was nothing more than a choke; he looked up with tearfilled eyes.  
"I hope you remember your pledge, Severus?"  
"Certainly," whispered Snape, his eyes spilling the warm tears down his face. Dumbledore hesitantly offered Snape a Chocolate Frog, and to his suprise, Snape took it, but did not eat it. "Eat," Dumbledore told him sternly, "it'll help."  
"Wasn't that the werewolves theory?" retorted Snape icily, but he had begun to unwrap the chocolate. Dumbledore raised an eyebrow.

"As a matter of fact, it _is _Remus' theory. Severus, you should try and be more pleasant towards him. He's going through the same grief as you."  
"He is grieving over that arrogant Potter," spat Snape with vemence, shoving chocolate in his mouth at the same time, "he didn't care about Lily like _I_ did."  
"Alas," said Dumbledore calmly, "When a man experiences a loss like no over, he often believes he was the one who loved the deceased most. Severus," he held up a hand to silence Snape's retort, "I know you loved Lily alot - but so did Remus. She helped him when no one else would."  
"What ... what do you mean?" stuttered Snape, looking curious despite himself.  
"I don't think I should tell you that," said Dumbledore pleasantly.

Snape looked aghast. "Please, Albus. I ... I need to know."  
Dumbledore sighed. "In that case, this information shall remain between you and I soley, Severus." Snape nodded, and so he continued. "Remus Lupin was, in his sixth year, a broken man. He had a hard time coping with his werewolf affliction along with general troubles in life - the fact he could not control his friends antics, for one, another being his confused love for a certain girl, struggling with NEWT preparation ... all the general stress of a sixteen year old boy. Although he tried to talk to his friends, and they helped, he still felt something was missing. Sirius and James were very popular-"  
Snape snorted.  
"- very popular," continued Dumbledore, unwrapping another chocolate frog absent mindedly, "and sometimes, I believe Remus felt pushed aside. And let us not ignore the fact Peter Pettigrew was too ... intelligently challenged to even begin comphrending what Remus was going through. And so, Remus sought comfort and friendship with Lily. She helped him, she _understood_, she comforted him. She helped him get through his depression when he was about to give up. He loved her quite alot, Severus - like she was his sister. Not in the romantic perspective, whereas you," he paused, watching Snape who was now listening intently, as if he were a small child who needed alot of reassurance, "you truely loved Lily Evans. Despite everything, always. And Severus, I am guessing she loved you too. But fate intwined and here is were her journey ended."  
Snape swallowed. "I should of tried to stop Voldemort-"  
"Did you not say he forced you to believe there were finer, pure-blood women out there who would take your heart quite willingly?"  
"Yes, but-"  
"Then you would of had no chance," said Dumbledore simply, a trace of sympathay shooting across his face as he considered Snape. "Although, a man can dream."  
"I dreamed," said Snape, his eyes glittering, "that she would be mine. She was my best friend - the b-best friend I've e-ever had." He had began to cry again now, sobs choking him.  
"Severus, Severus ... I believe she knew this."  
"What?" Snape sat up straight now, his sobs subsiding quickly. Dumbledore revealed the glimpse of a smile, and took a bite of his chocolate frog before replying to him.

"Remus mentioned it a while ago," he told Snape, "they were discussing you. She felt sad your close friendship had ended, but could never start it again. Too much tension between all of you. However ... she told Remus she loved you very, very much."  
"Oh." Snape was at a loss for words now, and a faint pink tinge crossed his face.  
"So you see, Severus," continued Dumbledore, swallowing the remains of his chocolate, "not all was lost."  
"No, no it was not," replied Snape. "I need to rest now, headmaster ..."  
"Naturally, naturally," murmured Dumbledore. "Goodnight, Severus."  
"Goodnight, Headmaster," replied Snape, bowing his head before leaving the office. Dumbledore went to select another chocolate frog when, blasted skrewts! There was none left.  
"Typical," he murmured, "I knew I shouldn't of gave one to Severus. Ah well ..."


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N: Just so you guys know - Confessions of a Black will -always- be the most important story to me. XD I am allowed to have other stories in progress, you know. So - COAB is my main one currently, but my other two projects are "Remus Lupin: My December" and Steph's challenge which I hope to write more of very soon. :) Thanks for all the lovely reviews and favourites - it's much appriceated! And sorry for the short chapter. /**

_"'But you are normal!' said Harry fiercely. 'You've just got a-a problem-'  
Lupin burst out laughing. 'Sometimes you remind me alot of James. He called it my 'furry little problem' in company. Many people were under the impression that I owned a badly behaved rabbit.'" - Half Blood Prince_

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I own nothing. Never will, unless J.K Rowling decides to give me possession of Sirius Black -demented fangirl look- [moving swiftly on -coughs-**

**  
**One year passed. Lucius still wasn't out of Azkaban.  
Narcissa was becoming very depressed; she'd lost interest in food, her social life, and life in general. Her hair had began to fall out whenever she brushed it - lots of it, not just the ordinary amount. She refrained from brushing it if possible. Her expression had become a tired, pale one, and her eyes had lost their glitter. Nothing seemed to matter now. One morning over breakfast (she merely had a black coffee whilst Draco ate strawberry flavoured toast - his newest obsession) an owl arrived, crashing head-first on Draco's large pile of strawberry flavoured toast; causing them to fall magnificently as if they were dominos. Ignoring her son's cries of dissapointment and anger, she lazily reached for the letter with her slender fingers, and opened the white envelope slowly. A letter fell out, and she began to read it.

_Dear Narcissa Malfoy,  
Our priorities have solely been to keeping the wizarding world happy, and keeping up with peoples day-to-day priorities. The reason we are writing is because of Mr Lucius Malfoy, employee at Ministry of Magic and contributor towards elementary funds. We have reason to believe he is still in Azkaban awaiting trial, and so, after pulling a few strings, we have made it so his trial is tomorrow morning at ten o'clock. We hope you can make it._

Warm regards,  
Cornelius Fudge, Minister for Magic.

She sighed impatiently and dropped the letter to the table, wiping her mouth. Of course, she knew Lucius would worm his way out. 'Contributions towards elementary funds' meant a bribe in other words. She snorted and stood up, brushing herself down even though she was vacant of crumbs. She hadn't interacted with anybody for ages - unless you included a few letters with Remus, and spending time with Dobby and Draco. Draco, it seemed, had forgotten he even had a father, even though Narcissa made a point of speaking of Lucius to her son at least once a day, so he'd stay fresh in his memory, but this was all in vain. She knew what she had to do ... she had to speak to Severus. Standing up, Narcissa made her way to the work-top, were she had stashed parchment and a spare quill, and wrote to Severus.

_Dear Severus,  
Lucius' trial is tomorrow at ten o'clock. This is just a personal notification if you're unaware of it. I'd appriceate it if you showed up, I have the uncanny feeling I'll be needing moral support. Any news on Harry?  
-Narcissa._

She tied the short letter to Fluffy's leg, who had been perched on it's stand, half-asleep. Fluffy hooted happily and swooped out of the house quickly. Narcissa rolled her eyes ... that owl was so loud. As she contemplated buying another owl, she absent-mindedly made her way to the armchair besides the kitchen fireplace, and sunk into it, overcome with fatigue; and it was only eleven 'o clock. From the warmth of the flickering flames, and the comfiness of the armchair, she fell asleep. For once, it was not dreamless.

_She was in Azkaban, visiting Sirius. Why she was there was beyond her. She passed Lucius' cell without so much as a glance, and she heard him shout weakly, but all the energy in his face had drained, his voice barely above a whisper. She made her way straight to Sirius. "I've come to rescue you," she was saying in a smooth voice,. He looked at her with an expression that could only be defined as infatuation, and he grabbed her and they begun to kiss passionately. "This can't be real," she said to Sirius when they paused for breath. Sirius, who she had just been kissing passionatley, suddenly turned into Voldemort. His scarlet eyes flashed with cold amusement towards her. "Oh, but it is," said Voldemort, who turned into Dumbledore. He had chocolate all around his mouth and was pulling empty wrappers out of his cloak and throwing them at her, as if they were confetti. "Give me all your chocolate!" he was screaming at her, looking demented. The dream changed quickly.  
Dementors glided softly into what now appeared to be her funeral ceremony and began to surround her coffin and the people who had come to show respects. Their eyes were gleaming. Fresh, human flesh to devour ... one lifted it's hood to perform the kiss on her - she was suddenly alive again. She drew her wand and shouted, "EXPECTO PATRONUM!" but nothing happened. Remus appeared from the crowd and she begged for him to help her, but he walked away into the shadows. She felt two cold hands touch her face, and ... _"AHHHH!"

"Goodness, Narcissa," said a silky voice she recongized instantly, "Perhaps I shouldn't of bothered coming to your aid." Still in a hot sweat from her terrifying dream, she glanced up to see Snape surveying at her with disdain. "Did you have a nightmare?" he asked curtly, his black eyes glittering somewhat maliciously.  
"No, Severus, I merely-"  
"Narcissa, I know you're lying ... but let's forget that now. How are you?" he snapped his fingers impatiently at Dobby, who sorted drinks out a few moments later. Curling his lip, he turned his attention back to Narcissa, who still had bright red cheeks. What a strange dream that had been.  
"Coping," she muttered, taking a sip from her drink. It tasted vile, she had lost her acquired taste to drinks other than Coffee and water. She hoped sincerely he wouldn't mention James, Lily, Sirius or Remus - she feared she would loose her mind if he did.  
"I see ..." he said softly, holding his glass loosely in his hands. She noticed his wrist was scarred, but when he saw her look enquiringly at it, he pulled his sleeve down furiously, blushing. "I assume you are pleased that Lucius will be released?"  
"Extactic," she replied unconvicingly, an eyebrow raised. He smirked. "No, it will be good to have him home," she continued, only half truthfully, "The manor feels quite empty without him, and Draco's forgetting who he is."  
"Really?" Snape regarded her with a spark of interest she hadn't seen before. She nodded lazily and made no further attempt to go into detail, until he insinuated with a slight nod she should continue. "Really," she said calmly, "I do try to help him remember Lucius by making a point of mentioning him at least once a day, but Lucius is nothing to the boy. He could care less, he really could."  
"Have you been eating?"  
"I-what?" What indeed. The sudden change in topic un-nerved her, as Snape looked at her in utmost concern, a strained smile on his face. He took her hand slowly, and examined it, his lips pursued as if he was about to kiss it.  
"No. Your blood flow isn't as accurate. Narcissa, you have to eat." He dropped her hand and she raised an eyebrow.

"How did you know?"  
"I'm a self-proclaimed genius, Cissy," he breathed, his eyes glittering. "_Accio toast_!"  
"Mother, that man just stole my toast!"  
"Quiet, Draco."  
Snape smiled at her. "Eat." She took the toast slowly but brought it to her mouth, and ate it in a few quick bites. Oh merlin, it was delicious! She really had missed food. Living off black coffee and plain biscuits did not suit her. It felt perfect to be indulging in such a scrumptious food, even if it was Draco's. She figured he would just have to object a little longer --- until she finished his toast. She remembered how the marauders had forced her to eat in her seventh year. That was so long ago, now ... the toast became stuck in her throat and she choked, her eyes watering. The toast flew out of her mouth and hit Draco on the head, who started wailing.  
**"Silence**," snapped Snape towards Draco, who quietened instantly. He turned his attention back to Narcissa, flicking his hair out of his eyes. Such a Sirius-thing to do. "Well," said Snape awkwardly, not being good at coping with emotion, "I'll be here tomorrow at eight to escort you to the ministry." He squeezed her hand sympathetically for dissapearing with a soft pop.


	34. Chapter 34

A/N: **Unfortunatley, these past few days I have been quite ill and unable to eat proper foods, and have had horrible back pain. Therefore, my imagination has, as they say "Done a bunk." However, I will try my best to write and not dissapoint you. :-) Thanks for the continued support. (Sorry for the despairingly short chapter. I apologise most sincerely x.x)**

_"I would assume that you were going to offer me refreshment," Dumbledore said to Uncle Vernon, "but that would be optimistic to the point of foolishness." - Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince_

They waited.  
And they waited.  
"Trial called to order," murmured an old wizard who looked as if he would drop asleep any second; he wore an expression of utmost fatigue. He glanced at Narcissa before inclining his head towards the Minister for Magic.  
"Thank you, Edward. Please bring forth-" he was cut off as Lucius was brought in, not in a cage as Narcissa had imagined, but quite freely, his black robes he had gone to prison in quite fresh. His hair was in perfect condition to, and he gave it an involuntary flick as if to emphasize this. So, he'd been given the time of a life in Azkaban, had he? Extra privlidges?  
For a moment, she wished he wasn't being released.  
"Lucius Malfoy, under the courts eye, do you deny being loyal to He Who Must Not Be Named and participiating within activities that are as follows; murdering, torturing, kidnapping, attacking, selling innocent people to society?"  
Lucius resumed a blank look. "Minister ... I believe strongly I were under the Imperius curse."  
"That," said the Minister, "is most likely under durrestiction. Cleared off all charges." He banged his hammer down as if pushing this fact a little more, and the court stood and begun to leave, muttering their suspicions to one another freely. Snape had an eyebrow raised and leant forward to Narcissa, his black hair framing his cheekbones. "I guess the bribe payed off well," he said softly.  
"Guess so," she replied quietly, standing up as Lucius strode arrogantly over to them. He looked suprised that Snape was there but did not push the matter; he instead took her hand and pressed his lips against her skin. "It's lovely to see you again," he said in a reserved tone, "Where is our son?"  
Ah. Where indeed. She'd left him with a Ministry offical outside the court room, but he didn't seem to hear this as he strode out, not bothering to wait. Opening the double doors, he almost flattened Draco.  
"Hey - what's your problem?" shot Draco angrily.  
Lucius turned very slowly, his face bleached with anger. "What did you say to me boy?" Narcissa and Snape had caught up, and looked shocked as he was about to threaten their son. "- Lucius - No, that's Draco. Our son?"  
"Did you bring him up to be this badly behaved?" breathed Lucius. Before either of them had a chance to answer, he slapped the child hard across the face. Draco's cries filled the air around them and Narcissa leapt forward to defend and attend to her son. "Are you alright Draco?" she soothed, rubbing his sore cheek. She looked up at Lucius. "What the HELL is your problem?"  
"I see you've mollycoddled him into a mummies' boy!" snapped Lucius, turning to leave. "Let's all go get a drink or something, and some food, I'm parched." And he strode off quickly. Snape shrugged at Narcissa and followed Lucius.

Life with Lucius Malfoy was not enjoyable.  
Granted, it was pleasant and had it's certain bonuses; unlimited money, being able to have whatever she wanted - but the way he treated them both wasn't paticularly nice. He loved them, yes, but if something upset him he often got into a sulk, and refused to speak to anybody for days. Sighing, Narcissa went about her normal ordeal, igniting the lamps once their flames had died down.

_- Let's fastforward a fair few years - _

Draco was eleven now; and once he had learnt to obey everything his father requested, was showered with gifts in return. Broomsticks and Quidditch gear, mainly. He'd already accquired his wand - what else did he need?  
"Robes," mused Narcissa, "Come on, dear." So off they went to Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. Opening the door, Narcissa reassured Draco she'd be right back, and went to check on something. Draco stared silently at the boy next to him with glasses, and began, with Malfoy arrogance, to reel off what he thought and how things should be done. The boy next to him never introduced himself, but merely nodded at Draco whenever there was a pause. "Who's that giant oaf, anyway?"  
"Hagrid - gamekeeper at Hogwarts," Harry told him with a cold over-tone to his voice. Draco nodded, already bored. Narcissa returned and recoiled at the sight of the boy; he was so much like James and Lily. "This is my mother," drawled Draco. Narcissa extended a hand and Harry shook it, before stepping off the stool and saying, "Goodbye," to them both, going off to pay for his robes.  
"What an odd boy," said Draco coolly, "Mother, I think these shall do. And I'm quite hungry too, so I want an ice cream."  
"Yes, of course ..."  
They took his robes to the counter, Harry gave a small wave to them as he left the shop.  
"Mother, why do you look at him with such curiousity?"   
Narcissa gave Madam Malkin a handful of gleaming Galleons. "I knew his parents," she said vaguely, picking up the bag of robes and inclining her head towards Malkin before leaving.  
"How?" Draco enquired, as they both made their way back into the swarm of people. Narcissa did not answer straight away; she pretended to be examining the newest broomstick with some thought. She remembered when she had bought James and Sirius brooms in Seventh year ... tearing herself away from hurting memories, she looked at her son and tried to be as honest as she could. "We were - his parents and I - friends in the last year of school."  
"Oh." Draco examined the broomstick too, with keen interest. "Mother, can I have one?"  
"No," scolded Narcissa, "First years aren't allowed-"  
"- Aren't allowed broomsticks, yeah I know. But maybe, I could smuggle it in, and -"  
"The answer is no, Draco," she said firmly. "Come on, let's go get you an ice cream."


	35. Chapter 35

A/N: **First off, I'd like to apologise for my long hiatus from writing. To put it mildly ... I couldn't be bothered. But now I'm writing because I want to, not because I have to, if you understand. Unfortunatley, I'm writing this with a migraine and stomach pains, but it's giving me something to do. So, without further ado ...**

_**"Another ten points from Gryffindor. I would expect nothing more sophisticated from you, Ronald Weasley, the boy so solid he cannot Apparate half an inch across a room." - Severus Snape**_

Two years had passed, and the tension within Malfoy Manor had not dislodged. Draco had flourished into a somewhat arrogant thirteen year old - an incredibly smug one at that - who would spend time with his father discussing how the wizarding society would be better without muggleborns - or in their harsh words - Mudbloods. Narcissa had been out that paticular August morning, no were busy - just sitting in the many acres of land they posessed, watching the peacocks Lucius had insisted on buying earlier that month strut about, keeping distance from the perfume-covered, slim woman. Diamonds and other fantastic jewels glimmered from her ears, neck, wrists and fingers, catching the light whenever she tilted her jewels towards the sun. This had become a rather irritating habit, but Narcissa only appeared to do it when she was unsettled about something. And this time, it wasn't about Draco not doing his summer assignments, or Lucius' daily rants about the Ministry - it was a piece of shocking information in a newspaper she constantly read. She hadn't showed her husband or sun the newspaper yet - she wanted some peace and quiet before accusations flew about. Shielding her eyes with one hand from the sun, she continued to read the freshly printed newspaper. A man with messy black hair stared up at her, not mutely - he was screaming and looked possibly deranged. His eyes no longer glittered and his face was rather hollow, his skin accumulating a yellow-ish tinge. She knew who it was even before she read the headline; 'MASS MURDERER ON THE LOOSE: NONE OTHER THAN THE NOTORIOUS SIRIUS BLACK.'  
Glaring at the article, she smoothed out the few creases on the page of the article, and continued to read, a rather scathing expression on her face.

_It has come to our attention that the killer of Lily and James Potter, Sirius Black, escaped Azkaban Prison last evening. Officals at Azkaban are baffled but nevertheless, this won't hold up the ten thousand galleon reward money to anyone who finds Black! However, in that light, we advise people NOT to go looking for Black, because he could be dangerous to those more unsuspecting. The dementors will be circulating around where we have ideas Black could be, but the dementors will not interrupt day to day business of the wizarding world. Ministry officals will soon be sorting out leaflets advising the best steps to your safety against Sirius Black._

In other news, the Weird Sisters...

She closed the newspaper. She cared not for news of her son's secret favourite band; she cared more for her cousin and the danger he'd gotten himself into - the prat! What the hell was he thinking about, escaping from Azkaban? This would make him the first escapee known to the wizarding world ... shuddering slightly at the aspect of what could happen if found by the Dementors, she stood up, narrowly missing tripping over a peacock, and stumbled somewhat ungracefully into the manor. Draco was sitting at the breakfast table, eating some sort of bread and cheese. Lucius was sat opposite him, writing last minute notes for his memo. At the sound of his wife's footsteps, Lucius looked up expectantly and smiled with perfect white teeth. She returned the smile in what she hoped to be a convincing way, but as she relayed the news, her voice broke. "Have you seen the daily prophet yet, Lucius?"  
He shook his head mutely, and she dropped the paper with the correct article on top of his work without speaking. Draco licked his lips, demolishing the remains of his meal, and glanced at the newspaper with curiousity. "Anything good, father? Have they finally decided to imprison mudbloods?"  
"Draco," snapped Narcissa, her voice quivering, "do not use language like that in our home - I won't accept it." Lucius, on the other hand, chuckled, still reading the grave news. "No, Draco, unfortunately not ... here's something that may catch your interest though." He flung the newspaper in amusement towards him, and he grabbed it quickly. "Sirius Black, notorious murderer ... who cares?" he said loftily, dropping it onto the table. "He won't come after well connected people like ourselves, will he mother? On another thought, though, his name is familiar." He thought for a moment and then said, "Wasn't that the man who threatened to hex me?"  
Lucius looked outraged. "Hex you? When was this boy?"  
Narcissa rolled her eyes in despair. "He was only joking, Lucius-"  
"When was this?" he demanded, knocking his memo over in uncontrolled temper.  
Draco smiled. "Simply years ago, father."  
Lucius looked grumpy. "Could of told me that early," he muttered, but then smiled, "But you're right Draco, that man won't come after us. Narcissa, perhaps you had better re-read the line were it states _we should not go looking for black._" The last seven words were over exaggerated tremendously, and Draco sniggered.  
"Aren't you - aren't - don't you care at all?" Narcissa stated furiously, her pale cheeks flooding with anger. She jangled her diamond bracelets impatiently, and Lucius smiled at this frequent glimpse of temper they often saw in her nowadays.  
"Not really," Lucius replied, shaking his head, "Why should we bother? He's Harry's godfather, is he not? I'm pretty sure no one will be letting Potter know that little statement ... might drive him loopy."  
Narcissa wanted to throw the nearest heavy object over Lucius but restrained herself only just. Draco was grinning at his father with admiration, and Draco decided to push the matter a little too far. "I never knew that father. Put perhaps the statement might just _slip._"  
Lucius and Narcissa simulatenously said: "No, it WON'T!"  
Draco scowled. "Why can't I tell him?"  
"You just can't, Draco," scolded Lucius, glaring at his son.  
"But we all hate him," he whined, "can't we upset him a little more? Please?"  
"I don't hate him," said Narcissa coldly, "And no, you may not Draco."  
He stood up, kicking his chair aside. "FINE," he snapped, "I'm going to my room."  
"You better not tell him, Draco," warned Narcissa as Draco went to the staircase.

Draco just grinned.


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N:** ... _Wow. I haven't updated this fic in two years. This is due to real life issues, general lack of muse, growing up, and growing out of my Harry Potter faze. But I've re-read this story recently, and although a little dismayed at the amount of typos, incorrect tenses and the fact I haven't written each character to their full ability, it's still good... the idea is good. The concept is interesting. I think I'm one of the first people to write from this angle, which is good. I have delibrated about doing several longshots, planning to span them out so many chapters... but alas. I cannot keep to my word. Before I start new stories, I must finish the old. And so that is what I am doing - updating the old and labelling them as completed. I know only a few people read this fic, but I don't mind. If I don't know you, and you have come across this fic out of bordeom or if it was something you were looking for... then I hope I can do you justice. Drop a review, I'd love to hear from you all. I'll do my very best to reply. *__**Sorry for the short chapter, but I felt compelled to update**__.*_

--

It was ten to eleven, and Draco Malfoy was standing with his parents outside Kings Cross station. To anybody whom was not from the Wizarding Kind, they would have appeared quite bizzare; several muggles had stopped to stare at the owl in it's cage, which was hooting loudly. The muggles who passed heard words like 'Hogwarts' and 'Wands' and 'Not to be cursing the Potter boy, Draco.' But alas, this was London, and the many people who passed through it were often strange. And so the muggles hurried on; not wanting to meet the fierce gaze of the man with pale blonde hair, whose dark green velvet cloak fluttered gently in the breeze.

"Muggles... absolute filth..." Lucius clapped Draco on the shoulder, smirking. "Let me know if you're _going _to do well this year in Quidditch, Draco, last year you were an absolute disgrace..."

Draco looked affronted. "Father, that wasn't my fault!" He looked at his mother for support.

"Leave off, Lucius darling. Now Draco - have you got everything?" Narcissa sighed and picked up one of Draco's suitcases. It was clear her health had detoriated during the summer break; her wrists were bony, her body skeletal. She would rival any witch from Witch Weekly, with her slim body and beautiful looks. But her beauty had come at a price. Although her hair had been carefully styled into ringlets, the shine wasn't there. Her face was gaunt, her eyes sunken.

Bellatrix was in Azkaban with Rodolphus and a mere handful of other Death Eaters, who declared themselves loyal. Narcissa hadn't heard from Remus, Sirius or Peter Pettrigrew for several years now, and she was beginning to think that she never would.

They made their way through the trainstation, and waited for Draco to run through the solid-looking arch. "Be good, darling," Narcissa said softly, kissing her son's head. Draco wriggled away, and darting a pat on the shoulder from his father, ran towards the arch at top speed. Within a moment he had vanished, and both Lucius and Narcissa stood in silence for a moment or two.

"Come on now, dearest," purred Lucius, sliding a hand around her waist, "We have things to celebrate... great things..."

They began to walk in time; Narcissa looked at her husband enquiringly. "What things?"

"Don't act dull, petal." She was so used to Lucius' sneers now that they simply bounced off her.

"I am not acting dull," she snapped.

Lucius chuckled. "Black is on the loose... I did tell you."

"No you didn't!" Her words came out shriller than she had intended-- several people stopped to look. "You said he had tried and failed!"

He brushed a strand of hair off her face, laughing, "It is so nice to hear you eventually accept your cousin is nothing but a _failure,_ Cissy."

"He's not! HE'S NOT!" Narcissa's tears were running now, her dam had been burst. Exhaustion and misery swept over her and she leant against a muggle newspaper stand, breathing heavily.

"Get a hold of yourself woman," whispered Lucius sharply, grabbing her by the arm. They apparated back to the mansion within a split second, finding themselves in the living room. Narcissa threw herself on the couch, weeping. "Dear god... you are such a misery darling... I would never have married you had your parents not bribed me so generously..."

"MY PARENTS!" she gulped between her tears, "Wanted me to marry you because you had money! What could they bribe you with?"

He simply looked at her. "Bella was right ..., you really are gullible." And with that Lucius left the room, slamming the door behind him.

Fluffy the Owl hooted happily, flying around the living room. "Oh, shut up you stupid owl..." Narcissa rubbed her ears and watched the bird with mild irritation. She missed her friends dearly - maybe if she closed her eyes long enough, she'd be back in the past, holding hands with Remus in the snow. . .


End file.
